On 21-July my neighbor across the street had a party. By midnight it was pretty obvious that the parents were not around. Most of the party broke up by 2 a.m. but a few enthusiastic participants and their hosts continued until about 4 a.m. This was a well behaved event. No loud music, no screaming dialogue, no nothing as far as I was concerned. I get up regularly each night to relieve back pain or a full bladder so finding the party still going on was not much of a surprise. I did not lose any sleep over it and was frankly pleased that my hitherto quiet neighbors could indeed “cut loose,” to some degree.
The event was repeated the next night. Also well behaved. It broke up about 2 a.m.
In my life I have never been a participant or even witness to an unauthorized “my parents are away” party. So the point of this post is to ask that question.
“Have you ever thrown or attended a party when you knew the parents didn’t know about it or would have objected if they were asked.”
Until last night my answer would have been no. And I’m 62 years old.
Summer of 1989. About a month after I graduated from high school, my parents went out of town for a week (I was the youngest, all of my brothers had long since moved out, I had the place to myself). So I got a keg of beer and invited all of my friends. It could have gone badly, but fortunately my social circle were in the sweet spot: kids who regularly engaged in minor misbehavior and knew how to keep it on the down-low, but no crazies who would get destructive. It helped that we lived in a working-class black neighborhood where trust of the police was low and no one would call them unless it got way out of hand.
There were challenges. My parents definitely did not keep a clean house, so I took it upon myself to neaten up before the party. I had to keep notes so as to return the house to its original state afterwards. My aunt who lived across the country was in town that weekend and I think she knew what was happening but if so she kept it to herself. Out of the blue, an already-paid-for pizza delivery showed up in the middle of the party and I think that was her signal that she knew what I was doing.
All in all, it was one of those things I look back on and say “damn, that was fun”. There are a lot of things I would do differently if I was 18 again but that’s not one of them.
My wife and I were out of town for a week and our 19 year old son stayed home to take care of the house and dogs.
I’ll keep it short… the dogs were in good shape and the house looked pretty good… but there was that bra hanging from the ceiling in the basement.
We are very good friends with most of our neighbors, and they just smile when asked and say that everything was fine but they have never seen that many cars in our cul-de-sac before. No police were involved so I guess it all worked out ok.
I have many, many, unauthorized party stories that I could relate, but two in particular stick out in my mind {they both occurred in the mid to late 80’s}.
First one: A set of parents are out of town for the weekend and a party at a friend of a friends house is announced. Somehow the party grew quite large until the entire house was filled with people. Then it happened… The multitude of people standing on the old wooden basement stairs caused them to collapse into the basement. By a stroke of luck no one was hurt {apart from bruises}. I suggested we get the extension ladder out of the garage to help people out. after that, the party then moved outside and just got rowdier. I soon told my friends that we should leave before the Cops show up. Then we heard the sirens. Fortunately, we were among the earliest to flee and were not caught. Those few that were caught were all charged with underage consumption of alcohol, possession of marijuana etc. I never did find out what the parents reaction was concerning the basement stairs.
Second one: Same as above only a different house. The Highlights:3 kegs were present. The shag carpeting in the living room was so soaked with beer that your feet got wet in your shoes. A young couple were caught “doing the deed” in an oversized kitchen pantry. Someone threw a planter off of the second story interior balcony {that overlooked the living room}. It shattered the large glass coffee table below. Party moved outdoors where more teenage nonsense occurred. Cops showed up again. a little more stealthily this time IIRC. Again my friends and I escaped unharmed.
When I was in high school there was a service called “The Party Pager.” It was a number to a pager and the outgoing message would have an address and directions. If you came to the house there’d be a huge house party with anywhere from a few dozen to several hundred people. You’d grab a beer, mingle, try to get out before the cops showed up or at least successfully flee. Usually it was the host themselves calling the cops because they didn’t know anyone at their own party. But the party pager would have another address, and if you went there’d be another party. You could hit five or six parties easily on a Saturday night.
It was just a few college kids with a cheap pager running the thing. Today it would be a pay app and they’d be rich until they got sued.
And of course my parents began their habit of traveling for weeks at a time when I was in high school so I threw my fair share of “unauthorized parties.” Never had the cops called or anything, but I never had people over for the last few days before my parents got home so I’d have time to clean and fix things if needed.
Me? No.
My daughter, yes. When she was in high school, I used to run away every summer for a 4 day music festival. One year, when I came home I noticed a few bottles of wine had disappeared. She claimed to have no knowledge of what happened. A few years later, she admitted to having a bunch of friends over. The cats were not traumatized and my bedroom was untouched, so I didn’t care.
She also went to a house party just before the start of her senior year. What was supposed to be fairly small turned into over 150 kids. The cops busted it after a 16 year old girl was wandering down the street in just her underwear. While many kids fled, my daughter did not. Ended up getting an underage citation. She had JUST started working and was bummed her first few paychecks had to be used to pay it off. We both joke about that night - she called me WAILING about getting caught, she was so afraid of what I would do or say. I laughed and brought soda crackers and water to help sober her up and also drove around the town looking for a few of her friends who disappeared. I guess I was not supposed to be okay with her actions.
As a teenager I only recall going to a couple of authorized parties, and not staying long. If you were looking for sex, drugs, and rock&roll it wasn’t going to happen at authorized parties. Maybe the rock, but it wasn’t likely to be the good stuff.