I had trouble figuring out how to title this, so here’s the question:
You are interacting with someone (in the US) where English is not their native language, but they speak and understand it just fine. Is it rude to use a word/greeting from the other language? Would someone take it as offensive?
The situation I am thinking of would be at a Mexican restaurant, for example. If I say “gracias” instead of “thanks” to my server, would they think I was being rude or making fun of them, or being considerate in trying to connect? I am very, very Anglo, and speak Spanish at a “Sesame Street” level.
The things that rattle around in your brain pan when you’re bored.
I disagree. The only way to gain proficiency in a language is to use it in real life. If you know just one word, use that one word. Use the occasion to acquire one more word, and then use both for all you’ve got. Each time you try, pick up more words. Just gotta keep at it and not get discouraged.
People in general appreciate if a foreigner tries to learn their language and are usually willing to help out. Use whatever you’ve got every chance you get.
I don’t think we actually disagree. I meant, if she uses the one word, she should not be surprised at a reply consisting of more words, and at a more rapid pace than on “Sesame Street”. I absolutely agree that at some point you have to force yourself to take the plunge and use it.
I work in localization and have exposure to many different non-English languages. I have both spoken and written words or phrases in those languages to native speakers of those languages who understood English – saying or writing “thank you” in Portuguese, Finnish, or Tagalog, wishing someone a merry Christmas in French, etc. All the reactions have been positive. I think as long as you are using the language correctly and don’t mangle the pronunciation or spelling too badly, people see you are interested and trying to learn and mean no offense.
I’m from Hawaii and feel the same way when visitors try their hand at Hawaiian, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, etc., words or phrases they pick up. Some people are respectful and sincerely try to understand the language and proper context for it and nail proper pronunciation; others treat it as a novelty and babble the funny-sounding word they just heard and laugh at it. Just be more like the former and not like the latter and you’ll be fine.
Very unlikely someone would think you are rude in this case. I mean, it’s possible to say “gracias” in a rude or demeaning way, but it’s pretty hard to do so accidentally. There is always the possibility for misunderstanding, but you’re overwhelmingly likely to get a positive response.
As a fellow Hawaii local (not Hawaiian as that’s reserved for those with Hawaiian blood) I’ve had the same reactions when I use a person’s native language phrase, especially as a thank you or greeting. The person always chuckles and either praises me or politely corrects me.
100% with you on the second part. Be respectful of the language and as with sales, listen 90% and speak 10% only when you know you’ve got it right. If you want to accepted as local, just take your time and it will come naturally. And for heaven’s sake, be respectful! Back in the 70’s or 80’s, Tom Synder (The Tomorrow Show) announced that his next night’s guest would be Rev. Abraham Akaka and chuckled and asked if his last name was joke. I wanted to put my fist though the screen. I’ve NEVER and I’m sure 99% of those in Hawaii thought it was funny as Rev. Akaka and his brother U.S. Sen Daniel Akaka were VERY highly respected and loved.
I know how to say I Love You in at least five different languages. I’ve learned there’s not middle ground with this. It’s either taken too lightly or too seriously. Even just asking a female friend how to say it it in their native tongue can be filled with hazard." :eek:
Edit: Like most people, I also know how to swear in those same languages. I was helping out at a local Filipino golf tournament and one of the lady golfers swore in Tagalog after she missed her putt. She asked the other three golfers if they thought anyone else heard her. I was on the side and said: “I heard you and I know what it means!”. Her face turned red and everyone laughed.
I’ve had nothing but positive responses from Latinos generally and Mexicans specifically when I’ve used whatever Spanish I have. I started out ordering in a Mexican restaurant in Anaheim as part of an assignment for my first Spanish class, and worked my way up to reasonable proficiency from there, expanding to more complex conversations with strangers in various Spanish-speaking countries. Europeans sometimes mistake me for a Canadian, because obviously Americans are all monolingual boors, but folks in Latin America don’t seem to share this antipathy toward Americans and seem pleased but not terribly surprised to have a pleasant interaction with one in their native tongue.
I also got a pretty positive response with half a semester’s worth of French in Paris, though some of my classmates reported a different experience. I didn’t get the impression the locals thought they were being rude, though.
A plus to using a few well pronounced phrases in a restaurant may get something good extra on your plate or on the side.
I used to have a shirt with a sumotori (sumo wrestler) on the front that said “hoitobo” which in Hawaii Japanese slang means greedy (one of the Japanese definitions for hoitou (ほいとう) is begging). We went to Dairy Queen and the girl serving us asked what the shirt said and I explained that it mean greedy. She had a good laugh and when she give us our cones, mine was twice as high because I was hoitobo!
I recommend being careful not to use the more formal or in the case of giving thanks, more gracious form of the foreign word or phrase as it may come across as sarcastic. Saying gracias is fine, but muchos gracias is probably too much at a restaurant unless you’re sincerely grateful for the service or preparation of the food.
I’ve never heard Japanese speakers saying the very formal domo arigato gozaimasu or domo arigato gozaimashita (both equal to thank you, very (very) much) in real life and it’s unlikely you’d in be in a situation (maybe short of someone sparing your life) where you should either.
I think words like hello and thank you are a special case anyway.
It’s common for people to only know those words in some language. And IME the listener will either not notice that they switched language for those words (because they are such common words, they may just directly get the meaning and not think about it) or will appreciate the gesture.
In Hawaii, (Yes, Hawaii again! :D), I and others use *Aloha *(hello, goodbye) and *Mahalo *(thank you) as a more sincere heartfelt way of saying Hello, Goodbye and Thank You. If the server at a restaurant is very attentive, I’ll give a quick Thank You throughout the meal, but will give a heartfelt Mahalo at the end of the meal as well as a big tip. I almost never use Mahalo Nui Loa in speech, but will use it in an extended email conversation where the other person does something I’m really grateful for. Using Mahalo as we go back and forth and end with Mahalo Nui Loa for the last outgoing message.
It’s one thing to throw out a “bonjour” or "gracias"or “aloha” (we’ve all seen Lilo and Stitch and “ohana” means family and no one gets left behind or forgotten), but don’t torture me, dude. If you have very basic foreign language skills and someone answers in fluent English, go with the English. And vice versa.
I run into this all the time. My Mandarin is pretty good but I’m not a native speaker. I can generally hold my own in a business conversation, but if go deep in a technical topic, I need some Chinglish or even switch to English. But I really don’t want to have to suffer thru someone speaking broken English when they are native level Mandarin. Drives me nuts.
If you can hold your own in a casual conversation for at least a few back and forth call and response, that’s good and most native speakers find it kinda cool (especially if they don’t speak a mainstream global language).
For example, at my main customer, one of the manufacturing leads is an Indian from Malaysia. Growing up, he went to pre-school with a bunch of Chinese immigrant kids and learned how to speak a decent level of “Meinanhua”, a Fukien dialect of Chinese that is spoken by the Taiwanese. It’s fucking hard to understand, and one really needs to study it or learn as a kid. Almost no one outside of parts of Fujian province in China, Taiwan, and some overseas Chinese in Malaysia and Indonesia speak this dialect. My boss, who is a native Taiwanese speaker, was tickled pink to speak to this Malaysian Indian in his local language. I’m not qualified to judge the language level, but they jabbered on like neighbors for a good 10 minutes.
When my local Chinese friend was describing what type of women I like, he told his native Japanese wife “He likes slightly goofy (my description to him) women.” to which his wife exclaimed “Goofy? Like Mickey Mousu?” We were both stumped about what to say until I said “Chotto kichigai!” and stuck my tongue of of the side of my mouth. She laughed (my friend didn’t get it) and caught on immediately despite my poor pronunciation and slightly risque choice of words. Chotto (a ltitle) was fine, but kichigai (crazy/retarded) is vulgar.
Next time you may want to drop the “camino”. In Mexico it used to be called Plaza Sésamo and now it’s just Sésamo.
I say go ahead; be prepared to accept corrections graciously. And if they start talking to you in Spanish, to say “lo siento, tanto no hablo. English please?” (sorry, I don’t speak that much Spanish)
I’ve spoken several languages in the past, but don’t feel able to converse comfortably at this point. I usually limit myself to a mucho gusto when the gardener guy introduces his crew guys, who are usually about as fluent in English as I am in Spanish. I see it as being polite without being condescending about things. My neighbor, who was originally from Nicaragua, agrees.
Even just asking a female friend how to say it it in their native tongue can be filled with hazard." :eek: