Viking Penis Ensues

I recall hearing or reading someplace that Viking Berserkrs went into battle with erections visible. To me this sounds like you’re simply asking for trouble (warriors with their penises cut off aren’t very efficient – they tend to be distracted), but maybe it’s supposed to be a macho or intimidation thing.

In any case, I haven’t been able to find anything on it in books or on the Internet (although I have found some interesting research on attitudes toward size in the Sagas. You will, too, if you look.)
So is this an Urban Legend? Or is this acually recounted somewhere, but it’s obscure?

This site says:

Finn Again – Yup, I know. But it doesn’t say anything about Viking penises, which would probably be covered if they remembered to tie the belts on their bear skins.

Whatever the origins of the term, the Vikings Europe was familiar with went into battle with chainmail.

Regarding the original OP does anyone really think something like this could really happen? What fetish would allow a large group of males to become so sexually excited at the thought of battle where, in all likelihood, they would become injured or killed. Sorry… unless these guys were complete animals I don’t buy it. Is there any other cultural reference anywhere in the world to this kind of behavior?

That is precisely my question. I don’t remember where I heard/read this, but now I want to find out if it has any credibility anywhere.

I recall a Tarzan/Doc Savage crossover by Philip José Farmer along the lines. The basic idea is that trying to kill another person, when you are sure you will win, turns the crank of many people.

I have overheard a few police officers say that when they are in a car chase, with lights flashing and sirens blaring, that they got hard. Apparently an involuntary reaction to adrenalin and elevated heart rate.

It would not surprise me if berserkers had similar reactions.

That’s be A Feast Unknown. Interestingly, this porn novel had two G-rated sequels, The Mad Goblin and Lord of the Trees. weird guy, Farmer.

But that’s not where I heard about this phenomenon.

I had heard (I’m not sure if I read it) that Hitler got an erection when he did those great speeches to the nation. This could be the same kind of excitement - an ‘I can take over the world’ thing - the rising of the hubris (teehee).


Fighting and dominance often does trigger that reaction . Stallions fighting will many times get erections , an I remember in the ‘old days’ watching pro ‘rasslin’ , the wrestlers often had hard-ons .

That’s all I have to add . :cool:

Well, if you can’t keep it up during battle, there’s always the option of a cock ring - seriously - if the disp[lay of a raging boner is part of the uniform, designed to confuse or intimidate the enemy (and of course there may very well *not/i] be a shred of truth in it all), then a carefully-tied leather thong or something would probably do the trick.

FWIW (not much, I know), I’d heard the same thing, but about Celtic warriors, not Vikings.

I vividly remember watching a film of wild chimps attacking a stuffed leopard, and the males all had prominent stiffies. They were all banded together, screaming, alarmed and ready for battle. I can easily envision human males experiencing the same phenomenon.

Maybe the used their erect johnsons to club the enemy to death. If the enemy was male, of course. With a female enemy er… well you figure it out!

Were the actual penises or just ceremonial phalluses? The men of Papua New Guinea come to mind–many tribes there wear “phallocarps” all the time–huge, often brightly painted and decorated wooden penis sheaths. Perhaps the Vikings you’re thinking of (assuming you didn’t just dream the whole thing) wore phony phalluses.

In his book Keep the River on Your Right, Tobias Schneebaum describes his time living with a cannibalistic tribe in South America.

Following a raid on a neighboring village, the men were all erect as they gathered around to eat some of their victims, after which they engaged in intercourse with each other.

I don’t think he mentioned whether this state of affairs was in effect during the attack.

Maybe I’ve just got an odd idea in my head, but I can’t quite picture vikings wearing belts. I mean, honestly, would barbarians take the time to coordinate the color with their shoes :wink:

From reading about the Berserkers, I recall they they kept themselves in a state of euphoria by eating agaric mushrooms.

And from reading about the various effects of hallucinogenic fungi, I recall that one of them is priapism.

Now that this connection has been made, whenever I see an pile-on tackle involving the Minnesota Vikings, I’ll always hear the song “Commanche” (from Pulp Fiction) in my mind.