no, no, no…you fine folks have found foods which are disgusting, yes. But none of them, none of them are as vile, foul, unnatural and (dare I say?) evil as chitlins (or chitterlings).
I tried them once.
once.
For those who don’t know what they are, I’ll pre-apologise for telling you. They are pig intestines, washed and boiled. Often eaten fried.
When I tried them, it was because it was something I had never had…either they weren’t washed well enough, or they’re supposed to smell like pigs–t. I’m not sure which.
I said to myself, “well, sure they smell like something you’d step in if you weren’t careful. But there are plenty of foods which smell bad but taste just fine! Give 'em a try!”
Well, I was right. There are plenty of foods which smell bad but taste just fine. Chitlins are not among them. They taste exactly the way they smell.
And the texture? EWWWWW! Imagine hot dog casing filled with warm cream cheese. The worst part was, after my first bite, I thought, “Well, maybe it’s a taste that grows on you! I’ll try another forkful!”
What evil mind could have come up with this stuff? It is the sickest most vile thing I have ever had the misfortune to taste (right above shampoo… don’t ask)
Pretty much anything Kraft drives me nuts, and I have major problems with anything that is called cheese but is not real cheese. Except the Kraft parmesan, that stuff is about the only one I can actually stand simply because it mixes into the spaghetti easily.
Actually Miracle Whip is a must have for, when combined with Jello you have the basis of that Southern classic-the congealed salad. Throw in some pickled peaches and that is good eating. Especially with salty, smoky country-cured ham.
I, too, must cast my lot with the Parmigiano people. It is just so good. On the other hand, I won’t make grilled cheese sandwiches with anything but Velveeta which is heresy to my brother.
I think the only foodstuffs I won’t touch even though I’ve tried them several times are licorice-flavored things such as fennel, tarragon and anise. Just can’t stand them.
I’ve also never been able to bring myself to try either tripe or chicken feet so I can’t really call them vile but mercy, they don’t look that appetizing.
Another corn snack. What is it with corn and cheese … and garlic. At least this one lists the garlic on the pack.
Opened the packet and the first smell is like a room at a school camp. Smelly, sweaty, unwashed jocks, almost dusty, but definitely not clean. They only list cheese powder on the packet, so by the smell, it’s limburger.
Most of the chips are in their triangular shape, albeit isosceles rather than the depicted equilateral.
Has the texture of corn and rock, ground up by Neanderthals, bashing the corn between rocks and leaving the rock behind.
Eventually gets soggy, but in the meantime, the sharp edges when the chip is crunched are capable of being used as scalpels.
One chip, two cuts in the mouth and with the amount of salt being used here, not a happy feeling.
BTW, since the OP directly takes issue with my choice of foodstuff, I feel moved to defend myself.
I eat pasta fairly often, but not often enough to justify getting the real parmesan cheese. I’m afraid that if I get even a small block of the stuff, I will not be able to use it within the 1.5 months or less that is probably required, and it will go bad, and I will have wasted a significant amount of money, as often happens with very many foodstuffs I buy.
If you have another option for me (besides the FoodSaver, which I have been tempted to get for other reasons), please let me know!
Oh, and I would like to add my vote for Miracle Whip. and a dozen other things I can’t think of right now.
Onions were thrown to earth from the pits of hell by the Devil himself.
What’s so horrible about onions is the fact that people like to hide them in food, and then tell you “You can’t even taste them!” or “They dissolve!” No, they do not dissolve, and yes I can taste them. Plus, it’s not so much the taste as it is the texture.
Well, I have to say that I buy the real Parmigiano Reggiano in blocks up to a pound and have never, ever had it go bad on me. Hell, I’ve got rinds in the fridge that are several months old (I use them in the pasta water when I remember) and none of them have a spot of mold on them, just a bit dehydrated, so I wouldn’t worry too much about it.
Strangely enough, I put real butter and real shredded cheese (Tillamook Cheddar) on microwave popcorn. It melts so nicely in the bag.
Velveeta & velveeta substitutes. Macaroni and Cheese out of a box. Any product that has the word “cheez” in it. Formed chicken. And just so you know, pickled food is generally a mistake. And that’s just the beginning.
Friends of mine used to go to Italy once a year and buy an entire round (“truckle”?) of parmigiano. They would keep it on top of a kitchen cupboard, and hack bits off it every time they needed some. It never went off, because it’s a dry cheese. I think the worst that could happen is that the fat in the cheese goes rancid, but that didn’t happen within the year.
Most of my hated foods have been mentioned already. I’d extend the contempt expressed for Miracle Whip to most “mayonaisse” that comes in a jar.
I was raised in a family that was real big on crap food. I was visiting my mum recently and she was proud as punch about the ‘decadent’ cake she made for the visit-- from a mix, covered in Cool Whip, with a thick layer of supermarket “Bavarian Cream” in between the layers. She was hurt when I couldn’t bring myself to eat it. Quote: “That’s real Bavarian Cream!” Sorry ma, real Bavarian Cream doesn’t come in a gallon tub and keep indefinitely in the refrigerator. And generally speaking, it doesn’t make you gag.
Other horrors from my childhood-- “Lemon Cheez” and “Marshmallow Fluff” – both abominations from Kraft, if I recall correctly. I could usually find some sugar-deprived sucker who’d trade sandwiches with me at school lunchtime, but I got those things every day. And Nutella. It’s really a miracle that I survived.
Anything from Kraft seems more like psychological warfare than sustenance to me. Philadelphia Cream Cheese?? You can’t fool me – that’s caulk. Don’t get me started on their salad dressings. Talk about dressing down.
And is there another company in the world that markets something they call, without even blushing, an Aseptic Juice Drink? Jesus!
