Warning: GTA IV for PC sucks!

Just a warning to any and all PC gamers out there. GTA IV, recently released for PC runs like a one-legged dog with a broken leg. It has it all: DRM, crapware, random crashes, glitches, et cetera.

The install process is insane. It’s two DVDs so you know it’s going to take a while. But getting the game onto your machine is only the beginning of the challenge. You then have to sign up for the Rockstar social club (if you don’t you can’t save your game) and a Windows Live Game account (if you don’t you can’t play at all). Windows Live Game of course requires a patch and you have to exit the game to install it due to a known bug. So once you’ve gone through these procedures, you have to pass a validation check (makes sure you’re not time-traveling to the past) and then type in your special code to activate the game. And then maybe, if you’re lucky, you can start the game and watch in amazement as it becomes a comedy due to the lagging putting the audio out of sync with the character movements.

Also forget about using your own controller. If you have an XBOX 360 controller for PC you’re set. If not you’re out of luck. The controls can be remapped except for the most important one, the right mouse button. It’s permanently bound to some stupid camera function which is much less useful than the “walk” feature I used in the other games. You’re forced to use W-A-S-D to move around which I absolutely hate.

So if anyone out there was excited about this game, don’t be. It requires a major patch and a very new computer to run smoothly. I’m running it on a dual core with 4GB of RAM and it still runs like a dead pig. I’d recommend waiting at least six months and getting a new computer then before even thinking about trying to run this game. And don’t use an ATI video card because that’s not The Way It’s Meant to be Played ™.

Graphically, the game is very nice and incredibly intricate. But you can’t even wander around admiring the scenery. Your stupid cousin keeps phoning because loan sharks won’t leave him alone and you have to keep rescuing him. I have a feeling I might be able to sell him down the river at some point in time and I sure hope so because I’ll do that with glee. And that reminds me: as I was rescuing him yet again, I had to chase some douchebag. When I finally caught up to him I slammed into a pedestrian and was about to run him down as well. The game didn’t like that and completely crashed my system to a black screen. It was such an epic crash that my monitor lost signal. It wasn’t a ctrl-alt-delete and restart the game crash. It was a hold down the power button until your system shuts off crash.

To add insult to injury, you get a girlfriend about two missions into the game. If dating is as much of a PITA in this game as it was in San Andreas… I’m really looking forward to a bunch of bitchy phone calls from my neglected girl who’s all upset because I’m trying to make progress in the game instead of doing stupid dancing contests! FFS! If I wanted DDR I’d buy DDR!

So be warned: fun game if you actually get to play it. If.

Whoever was in charge of the port should get sued. I don’t know what the hell they were doing for the past 7 months, but whatever it was it had absolutely nothing to do with porting GTA IV to PC.

A friend of mine has a a modern PC with a quad core CPU that is two generations ahead of the xbox 360 and a GPU THREE generations ahead of what the XBOX 360 has with about 4 times more VRAM and over 4 times overall system RAM and the game, according to him, looks WORSE on the PC than on the xbox 360.

It’s inexcusable.

And then they have the unmitigated gall to make you sign in to two (three if you get it on steam) different online services before you can play or load a saved game?

I can already hear them bitching a few months from now on how no body bought their game because of pirates and refusing to take responsibility for a sloppy, unfinished port with over kill, unreasonable DRM.

Fuck Rock Star, Fuck EA, and fuck the asswipes who worked on this steaming pile of shit they call a PC port.

Well, shit - I just bought this for my brother for Christmas, and our PC is pretty old (2 years, probably only a 1Ghz single core processor, 256MB RAM - though I could be wildly wrong about any of these). My brother thinks it is just over the minimum spec for the game, he’s been looking forward to the release for months - should I take it back to the shop and get something else?

Probably. I heard good things about Deadspace. Fallout 3 also has the sandbox feel and there are no nagging girlfriends or cousins in that. And even if there were, you’d probably be able to off them at your leisure :slight_smile:

Man I’ve been expecting this thread. I have been close to pitting it myself. I know this is The Game Room, but we should have a one time hybrid-pitting exception for discussion of this game.

Great game, ***horribly ***executed for the PC. Just like the OP, I was yelling at my monitor before I was done installing (oh but wait! once installed, the first stage of the game is figuring out how to launch it!). I have some quirks with my system, and thought it must have been something wrong on my end, but by now I know the truth … it’s just a shitty product.

The absolute worst, rock-bottom failure in it all is the Games for Windows Live service. From this day forward I will stay a mile away from anything that requires that bullshit. The double sign-in is annoying enough, but it’s over the top when one of them can only log you in a third of the time, and takes 2 minutes to fail before you can move past it. It simply should not take 2-5 minutes to launch a game. I expect games released two years from now to still run better on my current system (1 yr old) than this shit does.

(Is there some voodoo to make loading easier? Am I just not getting it? Is GFWL really as bad as I am experiencing? Does anyone else log in more than 50% of the time?)

I benchmarked at about 30fps, which ain’t bad, and plays well for an indefinite time … .but inevitably it begins to lag until finally becoming unplayable. Sometimes it happens rather suddenly 10 minutes in … sometimes two hours later. Rebooting helps, but with Vista and GTA4 … to get back to playing is like 10 minutes, and I usually just do something else instead.

With that said … it is of course the game of the decade. When it works. I just hope they can fix a lot of the troubles with a patch at some point.

A couple things … you can set your phone to Sleep and not have to get calls from your people if you just want to roam around.

The girlfriends will offer benefits later on, but are not required in any way. Not for the story or for 100%.

Sorry, no.

I haven’t had most of the problems reported in this thread (I’m running on a pretty new quad core machine with pretty graphics card) but it did lose my progress / saved games. Twice. FUCK!

Have any of the console GTA ports (I mean since the games jump to 3d) been any good? I know I played a port of Vice City and it worked adequately. Especially with the Liberty City Mod. But, at the time the game was a year or so old and my machine was brand new with lots of bells and whistles yet things still ran slower than they should have.

I didn’t even bother trying GTA III reports were so bad for it.

San Andreas was pretty cool. It looked like shit of course, it was ancient in terms of graphics by the time it came out on the PC. But I didn’t have any issues with it.

Yeah I stupidly pre-ordered this on Steam because I got GTA:Vice City for free.

I was on a trip when the game released so I was able to watch everyone gnash their teeth and try to figure out how to get it working. Today I went through all the preliminary stuff to launch the game (update drivers, update DirectX, etc) and launched.

Rockstar Social Club - fuck you, skip. Games for Windows - have to sign in, update, restart, re-sign in. The whole process takes 10 minutes and I’m not even at a loading screen yet.

I finally jump though all the required bullshit hoops and the game starts. Opening sequence, done. Now drive home - wait. Why the fuck is the camera constantly spinning around my car? I can’t go five feet without crashing into something.

So I quit, go online again and find that gee, like some sort of freak I have a plug-and-play joystick hooked up to my computer. To get the game to work right I can either unplug the joystick or remove the drivers for it.

Fuck you, Rockstar. Fuck you for spending all your time adding unnecessary horseshit like Rockstar Social Club while failing to see if the game actually, you know, WORKS.

1 Ghz single core processor and 256MB ram sounds more like a 7 year old computer than 2 year old computer (and a low end one at that). You’ll have no chance of playing this game or probably any modern game if that’s the case.
Anyway, that’s too bad, I was thinking of playing the game when it got ported. Sounds like they did the worst they could.

I played the PC port of San Andreas and it was fine. Looked way better than it would on a PS2.

Both the ports for Vice City and San Andreas worked fine. Controls and aiming was a bit wonky, enough so you could tell it was a port, but not worse than that.

Yeah seriously, thats a cheap decade old computer. Expecting to play anything made in the past 8 years is simply expecting too much. You could buy a better computer for the price of the video game.

GTA IV, imo, honestly wasn’t a good game to begin with. It’s got all the qualities a good game should have, then they ruin it by constantly making you run shit errands for all your “friends” when really you just want to be seeing more of the story or, gods forbid, exploring some of the city. Turning your cell phone off helps, but everyone always gets pissed at you for one reason or another cause you can’t drive across the entire damn city in an hour just to waste time by bowling with them or something. I just didn’t enjoy the game at all

I read a recent article on IGN that interviewed the lead schmucks who are responsible for the terrible GTA IV port. IGN grilled them pretty hard on the technical problems that a lot of people are experiencing. Unsuprisingly, Rockstar blamed it on us not knowing how to update our own drivers. I tried to find the article but IGN’s website is a black hole of ads and suck.

This is indeed one of the worst ports ever. You can’t rebind certain keys in the control options. Why? I don’t know, it just won’t let you. There is no AA. It won’t let me set the graphics to High under video options on my quad core beast of a gaming PC. Yet it still runs like slop. The guys who were interviewed said they limited the options to protect us from ourselves. Looks like that worked real well, guys! :rolleyes:

Saints Row 2 is superior to GTA IV in everything but the graphics department. I think they’re releasing a PC version soon. You should check it out.

Oh fuck. Count me in as another guy who essentially spent fifty smackeroos on a copy of Vice City. I knew I was below the minimum specs when I bought it, but it was a case of 1.5 GHz dual-core, 2GB RAM, and 256MB video card versus 1.8 GHz dual-core, 2GB RAM, and 256MB video card. What’s really pissing me off is that it worked perfectly the first two times I played it, but now it refuses to load the textures and keep them for more than a split-second. I can see nothing except the cars and the skybox.
Of course, part of this could be because I decided to buy a laptop with DirectX10 video card, rather than a cheaper and faster DirectX9 card, because I figured it would be good future-proofing. Well, turns out I got a 8600M GS 'stead of an 8600M GT, which means I got the one card that nVidia doesn’t release drivers for. Fuck my life. Time to play Dwarf Fortress.

Wish I read this during the pre-release Steam had going. So I bought the game and got Vice City too. Vice City is awesome and I’m glad I was able to play that again but the download is 16GB at 70kb/s and I found out my video card can’t handle it. It is very resource intensive.

I don’t know if this link will work but it’s the article.

And god damn did those Rockstar guys sound like weasels. They tested on beta drivers that weren’t out when the game was released. Might have mentioned that with the release!
Also, they said a lot of the error message people were getting on install were just error numbers and not messages telling what the problem was (For example needing a service pack.) Why in God’s name would they allow a crippled installer out the door like that? Dumb.

I hope the updated drivers fix everyone who has been having problems. Also, for anyone who bought it from Stream apparently there is a chance for refunds. It’s mentioned at the start of the article. I am not sure how that works, but it would be worth looking into.

As far as gameplay. I haven’t finished the game yet, but i have enjoyed playing the console version. I haven’t minded the phone calls at all. Either, I ignore them when they occur. Or, I take the call say yes and call back right away to cancel.

Ah, thanks for the link. Here’s the part of the article I was citing

Bolding mine.

What a condescending little shit. And guess what, even after they limited our options it still doesn’t run! Maybe that means it’s not the user?

I’m happy to report that the game does seem to be stabilized by a driver update and a patch. I was able to play through that Roman mission while bumping into all sorts of stuff and the game didn’t crash. Let’s hope it holds.