Not really. There are many other boards that offer paid membership and the forum software for this board is not very old. It’s running on vBulletin 3.7.3. Most boards are around the 3.8.x version. 3.7.x is not that old.
I don’t know; maybe it’s due to the large user base.
I agree that the operation of this board is pretty crappy. Get it updated to 3.8.x or 3.9.x (anything 4 and up at this time is shit and won’t work well with this board).
Does this mean Marley managed to ban the database this time instead of us?
For me it was down prime-time on a Sunday, when there was bugger all on TV and I’d watched all my DVDs. I was bereft.
C’mon, “staff,” you’ve got your orders. Hop to it! 
Yes, no doubt they’ll jump right on that.
I’m not a tech person, so what exactly is a “database error” anyway?
Other weird things keep happening. Advanced Search often tells me I have to wait X period of time before I can Search again even if it’s the first Search I’ve made. (And no, I had not clicked on New Posts either.)
It’s known in SDMB jargon as a “frequent occurrence”, not to be confused with “Hi Opal”, “zombies” or “1920’s Style Death Ray”.
Thank you for explaining that in layman’s terms.
Fine. Maybe not “decades” old, but feels decades old.
Anyhow, I kid. Love this board to death, just wish someone would get down in there with a can of WD-40 or some shit.
But if it was a white screen. . . 
You’re velcome. I am hier all zee veek. Try zie viel. Tvip your vaitress.
I love it too, and I get withdrawals when it’s down. It’s just down for far too often and for far too long when it is. Honestly, it’s a bit embarrassing, especially given the solid nature of Vbulletin on EVERY OTHER WEBSITE EVER, the amount of mods we have, etc. The moderators need to be empowered with basic knowledge of how the squirrels operate, and lash them into line as cruelly as possible when necessary.
I mean…many of us pay for this shit, me included. I hate to keep beating the drum, but Jesus Fucking Christ…what is it with the constant downtime and database errors? It can’t be that complicated given I witness other boards using the very same software that never have the amount of issues this place has.
I hesitate to ask, but I will anyway: what in the fuck is the problem? Mods…why does this place have so many and frequent meltdowns when compared to other boards using the same (ubiquitous) software?
And the answer can’t be “we get more traffic than other boards” either.
It’s his birthday, and he decided to take a break.
What database is SDMB using? Is vBulletin also a DB?
I got the DB error message, too. Not a white screen. I’ll blame the white supremacists here for that anyway.
I got the white screen when trying to access The Straight Dope, and the DB error message when trying to access the message board.
OK, I only tried the message board.
I love how the “why does this particular messageboard that uses incredibly generic and common software have so much downtime?” question gets ignored repeatedly. And if they don’t ignore it, its “I don’t know”. How do you not know? Who’s running this shit anyway?
I mean this in a tongue in cheek yet serious way. Who? Why? Where? What?
I just don’t get it. I suppose it’s supposed to be a part of this board’s “charm”.
The database is the system that holds the data. For a message board, the data is posts, usernames, that sort of thing.
When you try to view a page of the SDMB, your browser makes a request that goes to a web server, and the web server returns HTML for your browser to render. But in order to know what HTML to return, the web server needs to retrieve data from the database. If that retrieval of data fails for some reason, that’s a database error. (The system probably records a much more specific error, but to us it just says “database error”.)
So what is the SDMB’s DB? Microsoft SQL? Oracle? What?
A small army of hamsters with chalkboards. There’s this huge room with them all lined up scritching away with their chalk, recording everything that happens on the boards.
Thank you. (I liked FoieGrasIsEvil’s explanation though.)