We have long since forgiven the US for Uncle Sam deodorant. We’ve forgiven you for KFC, Pizza Hut, Taco Bell, and Dominoes. We may even one day forgive you for McDonalds. We even like you for Sizzler.
Imagine then my shock at finding in my local paper yesterday an advertisement for “The Outback Steakhouse” (whose slogan should surely be "The Aussie food you have when you’re not having Aussie food).
This kind of betrayal cannot go unavenged. We intend to infiltrate your culture with Chiko Rolls and battered savs until you withdraw. We will send in guerrila troops to put beetroot and pineapple on your hamburgers. We will replace your chocolate spread with vegemite and your Budweiser with Fosters.
And if you still do not capitulate, we will undermine the cultural fabric of your nation by introducing pie floaters to the US - that’ll teach you.