Weasel disables Large Hadron Collider, pays the ultimate price

Link (NPR)

Could have been worse. I don’t think we’re equipped to deal with a vengeful Dr. Manhattan weasel. Looks like the LHC will be down for a few weeks. Definitely not ideal, but I’m glad the damage wasn’t more severe. I hope the little critter went down quickly.

Oh, sure it was a weasel. It definitely wasn’t the creatures from Kepler-186f, attempting to sabotage our invention of quantum propulsion.

Some pet weasel lost his life, but his owner holding him at the time is now Ferret Man!

Weasels are mustelids. They are predatory, carnivorous little creatures. They aren’t gnawers, though. That whole destructive “what can I chew that will cost somebody the most possible amount of money” thing is a strategy of rodents. The small furry creature that had its intrinsic field removed was much more likely some species of rat than it was a weasel.

So the weasel was framed while some rodent made it look like a suicide.

Weasels are well known for their Luddite inclinations. Second only to gremlins. You usually don’t encounter them in the field (well, yes, in the field, but no, not in a field of endeavor - a career as it were) because their plans are so cunning - hence the phrase…

Blackadder: I have come up with a plan so cunning you could stick a tail on it and call it a weasel.


Who Fwamed Woger Weasel?

I don’t know whether I enjoy that line more in an Edward G. Robinson voice or a Humphrey Bogart voice.

Here is a “before” picture of the poor guy, if anyone is interested.

The question is what did the Kepler-186F agent do before he tossed a weasel onto the power grid to cover his actions?
Remember the Iranian centrifuges and Stuxnet? :dubious:

Is a weasel (or rodent, whatever) so out-of-place in the LHC? According to the definitions as I understand them, a weasel (or rodent) is just a very large hadron, right?

Agent 247 reporting mission success.

It also works in a Phil Hartman as Zapp Brannigan voice.

Of course, I meant to say Billy West as Zapp Brannigan. Must have been an autocorrect problem.

I didn’t know Donald Trump was even in Switzerland.

“First actual case of weasel being found.”

How did it fry again? Weasel gripped live mesh…?

Could this have been the work of Straight Dope member Spice Weasel?

I was assisting Elzar with a cooking competition that day. Sheesh, next you’re gonna ask me if I knew him.