Weep like a...

Weep like a hiker in the woods who has had to take a dump and squatted over a bear trap. Not at the precise moment, of course…about two seconds later when he hit the end of the chain.

Weep like a musical saw trio.

Weep like a musical saw trio playing “Crazy.”

Weep like a musical saw duo after somebody shot the bass saw player.

Weep like you’ve been rode hard and put away wet.

Weep exactly like a submarine is not supposed to do.

You should incorporate this into a totally inappropriate sentence should you ever enter the Bulwer-Lytton contest.

I thought the only answer for this was “Weep like a little bitch with a skinned knee,” but I like everyone elses better.

I like yours almost as much as my own.

Weep like a little girl at an Nsync concert.

Who’s in too deep. And needs his sleep.