I am wrapping up some of my last details (Finals) for college. Things have been an absolute mess this semester. Despite four years of looking forward to finishing school, the whole thing culminated up to a nerve-wracking couple of months where everything and anything went wrong. Being a human being, born of human limitations, I worked very hard to do everything I could to make sure things work out. There are still plenty of factors beyond my control, but there’s no sense in giving myself an ulcer over something I can’t prevent.
So, for starters, I’m not going to worry about grades. I know what I am capable of, I know I have come through in similar situations. I also know even if I bomb a final or something goes terribly wrong with one class, I’m not graduating until late spring 2005 anyway, and I have to be registered anyway also to participate in a play. Granted having to repeat one piddly class would be very inconvenient, but it is not worth getting suicidal over. I make mistakes, I know that. I try to avoid putting myself in situations where I am forced to deal with the product of poor judgement in the past. So I will do all I can today and tomorrow to ensure this is the Best Semester Yet.
I am cast for the Bacchae (yay! 
) but the timing of this boon was complicated by the fact that I am supposed to be graduating this semester. However, I now know that I simply need to enroll in Open University, and it will not cost me an arm and a leg to be a registered student just so I can participate in the play. In a worst-case scenario, I would have to be registered Spring Semester anyway to repeat a class I got a ‘D’ in (which would cause me to be ONE UNIT short of upper division Engish credits required to graduate :mad: ) but I’m not fretting…open university…or finshing up part-time. I’m not destroying my future hopes here, just delaying some things.
Recently I have come to the conclusion that in many cases, people’s dreams are aspirations which people are not yet ready to sacrifice for. Whether this is a bunch of fortune-cookie hogwash or not, it did make me realize that if I really want to be a part of a play, I can. I’d have to put some other plans aside, but I could do it. If it turns out that I overloaded myself this semester, with five classes and three part-time jobs, causing my grades in school to suffer, then maybe spending a little bit longer to finish up isn’t so bad.
In wrapping up school, I think of a quote similar to that in the end of Platoon- In the end, it wasn’t about me overcoming school, but overcoming myself.
