This thread seems like a time warp. My oldest sis was in this situation and there was never any question that there would be an abortion from her or from my parents. Seeing as how she’s now in her 50’s (and was then 17) and still doesn’t have children after 25 years of marriage, it was the right decision for her. I do have a child and would hope, had I gotten pregnant in high school, they would have suggested the same for me.
Wow. My son is 16. If he got someone pregnant. Abortion.
We lived in a neighbourhood where a lot of children were being raised by their grandparents or other family members. However my mother told me (when I was a sheltered and naive 12 years old) that she was done raising children, and so, should I find myself pregnant and want the baby, I would be raising it my own self.
But really, if I had gotten pregnant as a teenage I would been off to Family Planning for an abortion without even considering an alternative, and I wouldn’t have mentioned it to my parents.
My best guess? After screaming at me and hitting me until they were exhausted, my parents would have dragged me to the closest clinic for an abortion. As I too would have wanted an abortion, force would not have been necessary. But if I had said I did not want to abort, I can imagine them using whatever methods necessary (force, threats, drugging) to be sure they got their way.
It’s all speculative, of course. People can surprise you, so who knows what would really have happened. I’m very glad I didn’t have to find out.
My parents would never have abandoned me or turned me out, I know that much. But they certainly wouldn’t have condoned abortion - they’re pretty strict Catholics. I don’t know what they would have done, to be honest. Either adoption or raise the kid themselves, I think.
I don’t know what I would do if it were my daughter, but I would certainly consider abortion as an option.
My parents would have counselled adoption, or keeping it.
I would probably have had an abortion without telling them- which would have involved borrowing money from friends and a whole heap of lying, but that’s what I would have done.
My friends and I all had a pact- should anyone get pregnant and need an abortion their parents wouldn’t fund we’d loan the money and organise some sort of “sleepover” type cover story. Devious yes, but smart and resourceful. Thank Og it never came to that.
My sister got pregnant at 16 (the dummy) and my parents, who are absolutely anti-abortion, told her if she chose to keep the child, she would be raising it herself because my folks had raised their family. (This sister was the youngest, and my folks were in their later 40s.) Thankfully, sis was smart enough to know that she wasn’t responsible enough to be a parent, so she gave her son up for adoption. At the time, I seriously considered having her and her baby come live with me, but I was still in the Navy and about to go overseas, so that really wasn’t an option.
She really did make the right choice - it was a *lot *of years before she matured. She has made it as easy as possible for her son to find her if he wants to, but I don’t think she’s actively pursued him herself. I think he’ll turn 28 this year - my baby sis could be a grandmother and not know it… :eek:
I don’t see what it has to do with history. There have always been abortions, and there have always been people who don’t want them.
I hope she chose not to have children, and it’s not that she was just unable to have any. A friend of mine (in her 60’s) was forced to give up her child for adoption (her parents wanted her to abort; she wouldn’t) and was never able to have any more when she was older. It’s pretty much the tragedy of her life. I mean she’s a lovely woman with a nice life and a career and all. But dude, the pain is awful.
Assuming I had a choice in the matter (as Dio is quite correct), my parents would definitely frown on abortion, but I have no idea how they would have felt about adoption.
Since I wouldn’t actually have a choice, I do know that, if the mother decided to keep the child, I would have been encouraged to try to marry her.
My parents would have counseled abortion on the grounds that no one that age is emotionally equipped to be a parent or maintain a healthy pregnancy. Had one or the other party to the pregnancy offered a strenuous opposition to abortion, they would have counseled adoption (and probably ridden herd on the expectant mother to make sure that she didn’t do anything to put the fetus’ health in danger).
I can’t imagine them urging a high schooler of either sex to attempt to raise a baby under any circumstances. To the best of my knowledge, my parents felt that this wasn’t in the best interests of the parent or the child. Marriage, too, would have been out of the question. My parents were relatively young when they got married (I think Mom was 20 and Dad was 23), but they acknowledged that it was a different era *and * my Dad was financially able to support a family. That’s not something a couple of high school kids in the mid-1980’s could muster.
My parents would have presented the options as adoption or raising the child, but I’m not sure they would have leaned towards one or the other. Basically, they would have sat down with the new parents (both of them, if possible) and discussed the pros and cons of either. Neither one would have considered abortion an option, and I’m not sure how they would have reacted if the kid(s) in question had brought it up.
My dad would have said for me to make the best decision I can for myself, and not for him, the father of the baby, or anyone else. Then he would have repeated that.
He gave me this exact advice (except for the ‘father of the baby’ part) in many situations.
Well, I DID get pregnant at 15. The “solution” was to have the baby and give him up for adoption.
And so I know that if I were to magically be 15 and pregnant again (oof, what a thought!!) and my parents alive, I would bear and keep my child.
Both my mother and father eventually realized that giving away my baby was a terrible mistake. In fact, my mother’s last words to me before she died were an apology for that mistake.
When I was in high school, abortion was illegal, and pregnant “girls” were not allowed to attend school. My older sister became pregnant during college and was required by the college to drop out. Of course a wedding was arranged as soon as possible.
I know of two shotgun weddings in my high school. I know one couple was eventually divorced and I believe the young woman eventually obtained a high school equivalency diploma. I don’t know what happened to the other. The fathers, of course, could continue in school or whatever with no problem except a possible “nudge, nudge, wink, wink” about his manliness and potency. The young women were forever after thought of as sluts.
Another option back in those days was to take an extended visit (usually to an “aunt”) out of state and reappear again the following year.