What are things Americans find rude that other cultures do not?

[Mops]

@HazelNutCoffee

On a related note, I always found it odd that Koreans make such a big deal out of not having physical contact with other people (like handing change over, or during casual conversation) but have no problem with being squashed like sardines in a subway or shoving past each other when walking down the street…

On yet another related note, Americans with yet another culture:

Some of the accounts by Americans staying in Germany that I read mention instances of people not only intruding into their personal space, but compounding this by rudely ignoring them.

Only, in a lot of cases, the intention of the person squeezing by would not be “compounding this by rudely ignoring them” but “mitigating this by politely ignoring them”.

[Juggler]

@ivylass

I’ve seen a couple of stories about this, like a Swedish (?) couple who left their sleeping baby outside a store in Manhattan while they shopped

This is not part of Swedish culture.

I think standing in line is something many cultures think they are the most strict about.

[Kyla]

@panache45

I’ve also noticed that in many European cities, it’s perfectly normal for same-sex couples to be moderately affectionate in public. In the U.S. it could be asking for trouble.

I wonder if this could be a perception thing. Do you live in a small town? (I’m assuming you live in the Cleveland area based on your location.) I’d definitely agree that you’re more likely to see same sex couples being moderately affectionate in public in, say, Paris or Amsterdam than in a Cleveland suburb, but my guess is that the acceptability of public affection in SSCs in some (not all, though, probably) large American cities would be pretty close to that in some large European cities. I’ve seen two men holding hands walking down the street in Chicago and it was no big thing. That’s definitely a big difference from the level of acceptability here in this part of Europe. (Where being gay is very much not okay.)

From GorillaMan:

On the other hand, many Brits dislike the American approach of pretending you’re loving every minute of serving the public. It’s just as obvious they don’t like their jobs, but with added dishonesty.

You know, when I was in Britain several years ago, I was interested to see a report on the evening news of a poll that said that a lot of British people would prefer to see more “American-style” public service. Do you disagree?

[Licentious_Ectomorph]

@ivylass

I wouldn’t say it’s rude, but I think there’s some sort of culture clash when European parents come to America and leave their kid in a stroller outside a restaurant while they go in and eat.

I’ve seen a couple of stories about this, like a Swedish (?) couple who left their sleeping baby outside a store in Manhattan while they shopped, not to mention the little girl kidnapped while her family was vacationing in Spain.

Here in the States, a small child wandering around would cause alarm bells to ring for me, and I’d never leave a toddler alone outside in a stroller while I ate.

Personally, I think leaving children outside of restaurants is a stellar idea!

[Bear_Nenno]

@Sampiro

… do not blow your nose into a handkerchief in Japan (it’s considered nasty- use disposable tissues),

It is nasty! Do people still use handkerchiefs?? Seems kinda old fashioned and gross to me. Can’t think of the last time I actually saw a person use one.

[GorillaMan]

@Kyla

You know, when I was in Britain several years ago, I was interested to see a report on the evening news of a poll that said that a lot of British people would prefer to see more “American-style” public service. Do you disagree?

“Would you like those acting in public service roles to do so with more enthusiasm and greet customers with a smile?” - of course that survey’s going to come out with a positive result. But give everyone a few days of real life grin-because-we-have-to encounters, and they might have a different opinion.

[ivylass]

@Juggler

This is not part of Swedish culture.

Which is why I put a question mark after it. I didn’t remember what country the couple was from, just that they were from some non-English speaking country in Europe.

[Butterscotch]

@ivylass

I wouldn’t say it’s rude, but I think there’s some sort of culture clash when European parents come to America and leave their kid in a stroller outside a restaurant while they go in and eat.

I’ve seen a couple of stories about this, like a Swedish (?) couple who left their sleeping baby outside a store in Manhattan while they shopped, not to mention the little girl kidnapped while her family was vacationing in Spain.

Here in the States, a small child wandering around would cause alarm bells to ring for me, and I’d never leave a toddler alone outside in a stroller while I ate.

Bolding mine. This is not normal behaviour in Europe! There has been lack of comment about that particular situation as pointing out that their children should have been watched would be closing the stable door after the horse has bolted. People believe the parents have come to that conclusion on their own and are frankly paying heavily enough without a press back-lash.

I know no-one in Europe who would dream of leaving their child alone in their car (for example), or in a stroller outside a shop. I think you are referring to a couple of incidents that have ben reported, but please don’t think those incidents demonstrate the ‘norm’ for Europeans.

To answer to OP: I was always taught to keep my elbows off the table when eating, so often keep one hand on my lap if eating just with a fork or spoon. In Italy is is considered quite rude to hide you hand under the table, people wonder what you are doing down there…

[smiling_bandit]

I’me gonna have to disagree with something - customer service is far better in America than in Europe, and people do enjoy it more. They certainly get paid better for it.

[dangermom]

I’m curious about the idea that smiley customer service is dishonest. Is it a general idea that to behave in any way other than exactly how you feel at the moment is dishonest?

I think Americans feel that smiley service isn’t dishonest, it’s just how people should act. You may not think your job is thrilling, but that doesn’t mean you have to take it out on other people and make their day unpleasant. A pleasant demeanor costs nothing, makes others happier, and is even good for your own mood.

That doesn’t mean that Americans are looking for fakey-fake grins and perky service. I think most of us find that sort of thing as grating as others would. We just like things to be pleasant and friendly. I am honestly happy to see, say, a familiar clerk at the grocery store, and we can exchange little bits of news or talk about things we have in common. It makes it nicer.

[Ximenean]

I do think Brits appreciate, and generally get, cheerful good service. The “have a nice day” fake American shop assistants are a bit of a stereotype we hold. In my admittedly limited experience I haven’t noticed sales clerks over there being noticeably more pleasant than they are here.

[ivylass]

@Butterscotch

I know no-one in Europe who would dream of leaving their child alone in their car (for example), or in a stroller outside a shop. I think you are referring to a couple of incidents that have ben reported, but please don’t think those incidents demonstrate the ‘norm’ for Europeans.

Okay, then those idjits must be akin to idjits here who leave their kids alone while they go party in a bar.

[carnivorousplant]

@elmwood

A coffee shop a few blocks away from me allows dogs inside on Sundays.

And that’s because…insert your own snide remark here…how does it come to pass that?

[GorillaMan]

@Usram

I do think Brits appreciate, and generally get, cheerful good service. The “have a nice day” fake American shop assistants are a bit of a stereotype we hold. In my admittedly limited experience I haven’t noticed sales clerks over there being noticeably more pleasant than they are here.

I’m probably overdoing it. However I was mainly thinking about waiters and other situations where people are making sure to earn a tip. (But we won’t go there!)

[elmwood]

@Butterscotch

I know no-one in Europe who would dream of leaving their child alone in their car (for example), or in a stroller outside a shop. I think you are referring to a couple of incidents that have ben reported, but please don’t think those incidents demonstrate the ‘norm’ for Europeans. .

Is that an American URL, then? I’ve heard many references to leaving children outside of a store or restaurant, alone in a stroller, as the norm in Scandinavian countries. Here’s a few I managed to dig up:

http://www.adventuredad.com/archives/international-stroller-habits
http://www.downtheavenue.com/2005/07/is_technology_m.html
http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m1355/is_n2_v92/ai_19487246
http://obscurestore.typepad.com/obscure_store_and_reading/2006/12/woman_who_left_.html
http://chezthompson.blogs.com/chez_thompson/2007/05/index.html (see photo halfway down page)

[The_Scrivener]

Referring to or calling people who aren’t your co-religionists as “infidels”. News flash to the Muslim world: it’s islamo-supremacist, arrogant and politically incorrect. It’s also ahistorical in the sense that in that the Judeo-Christian tradition preceded yours and provided the foundation for your faith, and that the name-calling makes, if anything, more sense the other way around.

[Full_Metal_Lotus]

Well…

I am Canadian… Years ago I worked as a Museum Curator in a small but very historically signifigant small town in South central Alberta (The original trading post was started by the CDN Equivelent of Lewis and Clarke).

We had artifacts and displays portraying both native culture and “pioneer” history of the area.

We got our fair share pf “ugly americans”… The worst was a guy (from Texas) who insisted on asking the “apprasied antique value” of every exhibit. It was a Sunday, and I was “minding the store” while our regular tour guide was busy giving birth.
Our various stone tools from the native history display “Well that’s an obvious fake! The world is only 6000 years old!”

“How much for the Ice Age Bear skull?” It’s not for sale it part of our collection. “C’mon… $200, I’d love to show them back at home how you guys fake up history!”

I got disgusted with him after a while and left him in the pioneer section… he asked me how much the plow was (it turned the first sod in the area, and is considered a federal historic item).

I told him its scrap Iron value was about 15 cents…
Regards
FML

[Muffin]

Canadian here, who drives Highway 61 to work each day, so I expect that my culture shares similar frustrations.

A couple that stand out here are “Indian time” and “consensus” http://www.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20060921.wmacgregor21/BNStory/National/home

When folks from remote reserves interact with urban business people, the differences in culture sometimes cause difficulties. An urban business person will want to have a meeting at a set time, and sign a contract with the representative that is binding on the Band. The person representing the band often will not recognize the importance placed on punctuality by the urban business person, and in any event will have to take any proposals back to the Band in which all the elders will discuss the matter and must come to a consensus before any contact is made. Although quite sensible, this can cause difficulties, for if the Band Council is young, often it will make contracts that conflict with what the elders prefer, leading to a division between the legal power to contract through the Council, and the on-the-ground actual power to not recognize or enforce contacts by the elders, which in turn results in the urban business person thinking that a deal is in place, only to find the community blocking the project, not being able to rely on the persons negotiating with him, and even then often sitting about waiting for for that representatitve to turn up to attend a meeting. Since band councils are usually elected along family lines, when one family is elected over another family, often a lot of contracts made by the previous ruling family are dishonoured because there originally had not been any consensus.

[Cardinal]

@GorillaMan

On the other hand, many Brits dislike the American approach of pretending you’re loving every minute of serving the public. It’s just as obvious they don’t like their jobs, but with added dishonesty.

I dated a Russian girl who got frustrated with “all the stupid smiling”. And she was a friendly person.

[Cardinal]

@Muffin

An urban business person will want to have a meeting at a set time, and sign a contract with the representative that is binding on the Band. The person representing the band often will not recognize the importance placed on punctuality by the urban business person.

I had an Argentinian roommate who was interning at our church. Even with the “preacher in jeans and a Hawaiin shirt” attitude of the church, it was more “on time” than he was used to at first, but then he acclimated, and when he went back home, he found himself frustrated with the “ah, whenever” arrival times of people.