What are you absolute most hated movies of all time? Your "zero stars" movies

Cafe Society
21

The only movies that I have rated 1 on IMDB are

Screw Loose
The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle
Reptilicus
Sharknado
Operation Kid Brother (OK Connery was the US title)

I saw the last one in a cinema and the guys I was with insisted on staying until the end because we had paid to see it. I don’t think that I made it through the others as I have long been blessed with the gift of just giving up on stuff that I don’t like and turning it off or walking out. If I decide that something is tedious after only a few minutes I don’t bother rating it - maybe it gets better, but I will never know.

22

As I have mentioned many times on this board, Alien. Stupid people doing the stupidest things possible in the stupidest way possible just to provide cheap jump scares.

23

Dirty Dancing is the worst film I’ve ever seen.

24

Bite your tongue! I unironically like this movie, bordering on love.

It was fun! Jeffrey Jones’ Evil Overlord performance was an over-the-top winner. Even the woman who played the waitress at the dinner killed it in her small but amusing role. The duck practical effects were enjoyable to watch, as was Lea Thompson, who could make reading the phone book look sexy at the time, let alone lounging in bed in skimpy underwear. Cap it off with Thompson singing a song co-written by Thomas Dolby and George Clinton. . .how can you hate this piece of classic 80’s cheese?

My zero star movie is “Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter.” It’s supposed to be one of those movies that knows what it is and revels in it for laughs - except there really aren’t any. About 15 minutes in, Jesus gets a shave & a haircut, and gets modern clothes, so after that, he looks like, “Average Guy: Vampire Hunter.” Where’s the fun in that? The filmmakers couldn’t find it either. They lose the only thing the movie had going for it: the giggles from watching Jesus run around in modern times fighting vampires. No jokes, no Jesus, bad acting and bad filmmaking equal a big fat goose-egg.

Contrast it with another movie of its type: “Bloodsucking Pharaohs in Pittsburgh.” It stuck with its theme throughout, had real, likable characters with back stories and arcs, and had a decent amount of funny moments. Starring a cast of strippers, a porn star, and Chef Don Brockett from Mr Roger’s Neighborhood, it delivers everything “Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter” should have, but utterly failed to do. An enjoyable B-movie watch.

25

I’ve only seen two of the movies already listed here, Blair Witch Project and Howard the Duck, and yeah, zero stars for both.

I loved the HtD comic, and was so looking forward to the movie. But it was a boring piece of trash. And I’ll never understand what the fascination with Blair Witch Project was. I don’t remember much of it now, but I remember one time when they’re lost, find themselves next to a stream, and come to the realization that they’d been there before and were going in circles. It was all I could do to keep from shouting, “follow it downstream, you idiots!”

My contribution is a movie called Anaconda that was playing on the TV in a doctor’s waiting room many years ago when I was stuck there waiting for far too long, and the movie made it seem even longer. The characters were sufficiently unlikable that I was rooting for the snake.

26

The one that I always post in threads like this is “Punchline” with Tom Hanks and Sally Field. You would think that a movie with Tom Hanks about stand-up comedy would be hilarious, right? Nope. A friend of mine took me to see it for my birthday and apologized profusely afterwards. It’s the only movie I’ve seen in a theater that I seriously considered walking out of, and the only reason I didn’t was because I kept thinking it would get better. But it never did.

27

[checks title again] Alright OP, you asked for “Hated”, vs. “worst”, per se, in your title. You got it…

There’s movies which are simply badly made, or plotted, or acted, and our displeasure at those is understandable…

But it’s the ones which are so horrendously misconceptualized in their genesis that truly get my goat.

Take Starship Troopers. [please] OK, people insist this is a satire. The good satires that I have watched have subtlety, wit, and depth, even as various insanities and silliness march across the screen (Dr. Strangelove is a good example). This just relentlessly whacks you over the head with its Anvilicious message from start to end, from the idiotic characters to the brain-dead tactics (as such) to the ham-handed attempts at depicting the most pathetic propaganda imaginable.

Maybe the fact that there is no Sane Man in the film, who is or becomes aware of just how fucked (up) he and his society is, that is one of the problems. Such a character often has served, in better satires, to lampshade all of the lunacy happening around them, even if they in the end are thwarted in their attempt to either defeat the corrupt society they find themselves in, or to at least escape it. Adding such a person would have allowed the material to breathe, providing even more of a contrast between the craziness they find themselves in and the character’s all-too-aware horror at the situation they find themselves in.

But here EVERYONE has bought into it all, nobody rebels, nobody is aware of just how massively hosed they all are, even as the bugs tear their platoons and bodies apart. I guess I didn’t understand the point of the tactics, or the invasion itself: when I saw the opening clip, I didn’t grasp how ANYONE could believe that space rock could have been launched by a non spacefaring species from halfway across the galaxy, a trip which would have taken many millions of years…oh, it’s meant to be a propaganda film you say. Whee. Not even the looneys running this society would have wasted time, lives, and effort on invading a planet that far away. Or anything else depicted in the film, even from a meta-perspective.

There may be “worse” movies out there, sure. But if hated is my main criterion for this thread, then I don’t think I’ll ever see anything to surpass this abomination.

28

Pretty much any Spike Lee movie (though “hated” is probably too strong a term).

If the standard is “movies I walked out on”, then “New York, New York” with Robert De Niro and Liza Minnelli makes the grade.

29

Absolutely hated Transformers: Dark of the Moon. Not much a fan of the first couple either but this was such a big budget pile of crap that made a ton of money anyways it just depressed me. Loud, incoherent 3-second clips just mashed together in the most lazy way possible.
It depressed me because it was so awful it should have been shunned, end Michael Bay’s career, and make audiences say “we demand better” but instead made a crap load of money causing the studio to order more of the same.
Thank god for people like George Miller who can make top notch action cinema.

30

I’ve asked you before what parts you considered stupid and you never responded.

31

It doesn’t make sense, but in the mid-80s, John Candy made one of the worst movies ever. Summer Rental. An hour and a half of no laughs that feels like a week.

32

Youtube link.

I started some discussion of the movie in this thread:

33

I’ve always enjoyed the fact that its IMDb rating is 4.3. I don’t know if that was created via score-bombing or naturally, but it’s good either way.

34

I’m a big Jim Jarmusch fan. I loved the movie.

My most hated movie is The Turning Point. Shirley MacLaine in a boring slow movie.

35

I don’t hate any movies, but do really dislike Shawshank Redemption - cartoonish, predictable - and The Departed - um, cartoonish, predictable. Obviously I just don’t watch them, but they pop up on a lot of lists.

36

Wow. You’re like one of those people that doesn’t like chocolate, or the Beatles. A rare bird.

37

So did I! Have watched it several times, for me it is a work of art.

Now movies that depressed me because they are so awfully irredeemably bad? Take any Elvis movie, but particularly Blue Hawaii or Paradise, Hawaiian Style. I don’t know which of the two I once watched on television one afternoon to relax from the exams I was learning for and I am not going to check, as the other one is probably just as bad, but I felt traumatized afterwards, an that must have been over 40 years ago. It still makes me shudder when I think of how bad a movie can be.

38

The Two Jakes, a highly anticipated (by me) sequel to Chinatown. Sadly, someone let Nicholson sit in the director’s chair, and it just plain sucked balls.

Cheyenne Autumn, or as Mad Magazine dubbed it, “Cheyenne Awful”.

39

The Remains of the Day. Well crafted, excellently cast…but it just pisses me off! Basically, two-hours of me yelling at Anthony Hopkins; “Dude! Do…something!

40

I truly hated Andy Warhol’s Bad. The Mrs. and I both agreed to walk out about 35 minutes into it.