. . .I would probably have to say “Legally Blonde.” Ugh, I hate that movie! Anyway, what do you think?
If we’re talking bigger-budget, mainstream films (rather than the obvious, Ed Wood-level choices), I gotta say Mission Impossible. I really, really wanted to like that film. And I really, really didn’t. Blech.
If we’re talking films that I didn’t think lived up to their own hype (as opposed to ones I just didn’t get or didn’t like) then Mission Impossible 2 would be a prime candidate. A loose string of predictable set pieces with no real plot and two-dimensional characters. Tedious, tedious, tedious. It was even worse than the first film.
Waterworld.
Boy, how many times will this thread come up?
I will just respond, as always, the worst movie ever made was “Come Back to the Five and Dime, Jimmy Dean, Jimmy Dean.” Cher, Sandy Dennis, and Karen Black try to emote under Robert Altman’s direction.
The horror… the horror…
I generally like most of the movies I see.
And although I consider Mission to Mars to be the most boring piece of garbage I ever spent five bucks on…
Stargate was the only movie I ever actually fell asleep through.
Andy Warhol’s Bad
“Fantasia.” That piece of crap was an excuse not to write dialouge. And what was the bloody point, except for Mickey Mouse and some strange brooms, and a lot of other weird things? HATE HATE HATE it.
“Collision Course” starring Jay Leno and Pat Morita (from “The Karate Kid”). So bad it hurts.
Although “Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death” might just be a tie. This one stars the venerable Bill Maher (long before he was “Politically Incorrect”) and is incredibly bad.
Well, there was the day when I saw He-Man and the Masters of the Universe and Superman IV: The Quest for Peace back-to-back.
::shudder::
But, the only movie I’ve ever walked out on was The Flintstones. What a freaking nightmare!
Without question…
Star Wars Episode one. Blach!
Great, now I have to wash my fingers to get rid of the presence of that nasty combination of letters.
If we’re talking about movies that are so awful they are hilarious, the winner would have to be The Gore-Met Zombie Chef from Hell. By all means, watch this movie.
If we’re talking about movies that are so technically incompetent and imherently bad they don’t even have humor value, then it would have to be Crazy Fat Ethel II. Though I hate to put a movie in this category because it actually gives the piece of crap some kind of distinction.
If we’re talking about utter pieces of heavy-handed dung that some people consider art films, we have Gregg Araki’s Doom Generation and Splendor.
If we’re talking about movies that completely failed despite the amount of talent involved, It’s a Mad Mad Mad Mad World takes the cake.
Then there are the foreign films. Is there anyone alive who doesn’t think Red Desert was the most boring thing they’ve ever watched?
How about the most incoherent anime? Now THAT’S a tough choice, but I nominate Appleseed.
And a Special Lifetime Achievement Award should go to all those jaw-droppingly tasteless Mondo movies. Though, I think this genre is finally dying out. Thank you, Jesus.
Final Approach
Very Bad Things
Not really the worst movie I’ve seen, but it deserves special recognition because it’s always promoted as a comedy, but actual attempts at humor were few and far between, and what few jokes existed were pretty bland.
Anubis wrote:
Meesa Jar Jar Binks!
Yousa saved meesa’s life!
(Mua ha ha ha ha, I’m eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeevil!!)
This is an impossible question to answer. There is just too many terrible Euro-trash and Italian gore movies – anyone attempting to sit through them all would go crazy before being able to pick a single title for “All Time Worst.”
Having said that, THE STEWARDESSES (in 3D) is a film I remember being almost impossible to sit through. Off hand, the only film I can recall being even worse was the second feature I saw it with, made by the same people (also in 3D) but set in Hawaii. Plotless, meandering non-scenes that go on forever, with lots of driving back and forth between different locations, but not much every happening.
There was also an atrocious piece of trash called CATACLYSM (in the early '80s, if I recall), an OMEM rip-off that made me want to lobotomize myself so that I could obliterate the memory of the film from my brain.
Any of these films makes PLAN NINE FROM OUTER SPACE look like a gem by comparison.
Steve Biodrowski
http://www.thescriptanalyst.com
The Men’s Club. Especially if you factor in the acting talent that was utterly wasted.
Armageddon
If you thought Mission to Mars was bad, how about Red Planet ? Yipes!
Does anyone remember Highlander II? When they made the third movie, they just ignored that the second one even happened.
Gad, it sucked.