What are your favorite James Bond one-liners?

I had interpreted the OP to mean best lines by Bond, not necessarily just by anyone in a Bond film. But with that broadened criteria, I submit, from The World is not Enough, this line by Zukovsky, after Bond ambushes him from behind a door, at gunpoint:

“Can’t you ever just say ‘Hello’?”

I’ve always liked Dalton’s comeback at the top of the IMDB’s quotes page for that film:

Kara Milovy: You were fantastic. We’re free!
James Bond: Kara, we’re inside a Russian airbase in the middle of Afghanistan.

'course, it’s dated now. Who remembers Afghanistan, and the Mujahideen? Ah, the mid-80s. Back when the Libyans were the baddies and people were worried about nuclear reactors. I remember blowing up Libyan SAM sites in F-15 Strike Eagle II, simpler times.

But, also this quip, from From Russia with Love:

[Moneypenny, M, and other officials are listening to Bond’s taped interview of Tatiana Romanova]
Tatiana: The mechanism is… Oh James, James… Will you make love to me all the time in England?
James Bond: Day and night. Go on about the mechanism.

It’s the delivery that does it; he says “day and night” as if she was offering him a cupcake. Bear in mind that Tatiana looked like this:

The lovely Daniela Bianchi there, one of a seemingly endless string of extraordinarily attractive women scattered throughout the Sean Connery Bond films. They all seemed to be get married to extremely rich people before retiring from the silver screen.

See, as a kid I thought the Connery Bonds were boring, because they didn’t have spaceships or Sheriff J W Pepper, but after buying a boxed set of the Connery Bonds a while back I’ve come to the conclusion that I was a stupid, stupid child. They’re entertaining, like a three-course meal, and I can’t imagine the impact they had on audiences in Britain in the early 1960s.

There is very little that is any good about Die Another Day but there is one absolute zinger in there from John Cleese as Q.

Bond: You’re cleverer than you look.
Q: Better than looking cleverer than you are.

Plays very well, especially as Brosnan plays Bond as a total dick in the relevant scene.

Actually, The first half is pretty good. It turns to shit when the invisible car is shown, and it’s dismal from then on.

Another one, when meeting Bond for the first time.

“Ah, the famous double oh seven wit, or half of one.”

From The World is Not Enough, with Denise Richards:

Dr. Christmas Jones: The world’s greatest terrorist running around with six kilos of weapons-grade plutonium can’t be good. I gotta get it back, or someone’s gonna have my ass.

James Bond: First things first.

Amusingly, now you mention it, Cleese has to show Bond that bloody car. I think we’ll have to agree to differ on DAD though. The shoe-horning in of Madonna is particularly egregious, as is the over-emphasis on in-jokes (just because it was the 20th of the series), all of which happens before Cleese comes on. As you note from there on it is pretty awful - any film that requires the whole franchise to be rebooted is not covering itself in glory. Shame really, as it wasted a pretty good set up (Bond spends 14 months being tortured after capture and has his licence revoked under the assumption that he cracked).

“shaken, not stirred”

I don’t think our opinions are noticeably different. As far as I understand you, we both think it started good and finished bad.

I actually saw DAD for the first time on Syfy the other day and I feel the same way. Interesting premise wasted on an otherwise silly film.

“bolan, mac bolan.”

“Just trying to keep the British end up, sir.”

The prolonged sword duel at the fencing club is also quite good, I thought.

“There were a lot of things he could say. “Son of a bitch!” would have been a good one. Or he could say, “Welcome to civilization!” He could have said, “Laugh this one off!” He might have said, “Fetch!” But he didn’t, because if he had said any of those things then he’d have known that what he had just done was murder.”

What?* What*?:dubious:

“I think he’s attempting re-entry.”
Of note, when I first heard this, I was too young to get the joke.

It went on too long and became annoying, IMHO. It might have been good, if it was a bit shorter. Being too prolonged made it bad.

I liked it.

To address the (mis)balance / Roger Moore / Man With the Golden Gun:

<eek> I’ve lost my charm!

Not from where I’m standing…

That would be a Sam Vimes quote.

One of the Roger Moore movies, and I’m roughly paraphrasing:

Bond has just finished bedding a lovely lady when he is called away for a mission.

She asks him to make love to her once more before he leaves.

Bond smirks, leans over to kiss her, and nonchalantly quips “I suppose it’s better not to go off half-cocked”.

I giggle just thinking of this scene.

In Never Say Never Again (I think, correct me if I’m wrong), Bond’s in a health spa, and a nurse is standing about six feet away from Bond, and tells him to fill a cup (for a urine sample).

“From here?”