What "baby stuff" is unneeded?

You know the one baby toy I’m totally getting for anybody I know who ever has a baby? The best baby toy ever? This thing. It’s a ball with holes in it that rattles when shaken. My little guy can spent hours holding onto it, looking at it, and trying to put it in his mouth. Five motherfucking American dollars.

We do like the play gym thing with the mat and the arcs the toys hang off. He’s been practicing reaching on that. And my parents got him the Kick and Play piano thing, which is the most annoying thing in the world but he LOVES it, and it was amazing to watch him figure it out immediately. Not necessary, but if somebody wants to get you a toy, it’s a good one.

And you need, if you have a big enough house, a place to put the baby in every room you’re in. Our first few weeks we kept hauling the Rock n’ Play from room to room - that sucks. Get one of these $25 bouncer things - very easy to clean, cheap on batteries (they last forever), huge play value. He loved it then and still loves it now at 6 months. I think ours was even a little cheaper than that one - that’s the one my mom has. Because you are gonna want to be able to put that little scamp down, especially if you get stuck having to pump. Trust me.

And consider cloth diapers. We use prefolds and covers and it’s so easy, cheap, and we never have to remember to buy diapers. You’re doing a ton of laundry already, it’s not much more. (I say that in every baby thread but seriously - it’s not really a hassle, it seems to be better for his skin, it’s super cute, better for the planet, you can even resell them once you’re done, etc.)

We needed a TON of receiving blankets because ours is a spitter. Thought we had plenty, had to go buy more.

ETA - when he’d cry and cry, developmentally, in the “fourth trimester”, the only thing that would stop him was putting him in the bouncer and bouncing it with your foot. Worked every single time.

You’ve gotten good advice above…hard to know really because much depends on your house/lifestyle/parenting style/child’s personality. Something I *would *advise, though: Extra waterproof mattress pads for the crib.

Picture it: Sicily, 1923. Wait…no…I mean… Picture it: Your baby’s room, it’s 4:15 am, and the little darling has decided to vominate every ounce of her last bottle/breast all over herself and her crib. So now you not only have to clean her up and change her while half-awake, you also have to remake the crib…unless you take my advice and put three layers on when you originally made it up during normal waking hours. Mattress pad, sheet. Mattress pad, sheet. Mattress pad, sheet. That way, your baby can go through three sets of sheets before you have to remake everything. Especially helpful when baby is sick.

This saved my sanity multiple times.

Once word is out among your acquaintances and coworkers that you are expecting a baby, people with toddlers and preschoolers will be offering you all kinds of used clothes and blankets. I don’t think I bought an article of clothing for my son until I bought the outfit he wore to my brother’s wedding when he was a year old.

My son totally rejected all types, so this happens.

How big is your house? If your child’s crib is upstairs, and you need a safe place to put down a sleeping newborn downstairs, you will probably use the bassinet, but if you have a small one-story, you probably won’t use it. The newborn does not need it.

We had one, because we wanted something with a good seal to keep the dogs out. The dogs never got in, and it never smelled, at least to us. Again, that’s a lifestyle choice. We also had cats, so we had a mesh sort of tent over the crib. The zipper broke when baby was around 10 months, but by then, he was bigger than the cats, and capable of pushing them away or moving himself away if they got in the crib and snuggled with him when he was sleeping. We’d been concerned about two ten pound cats piling onto our 8 pound baby for warmth when he couldn’t move away.

If your washer has a double rinse setting, use it, though.

Also, if you don’t own a washer and dryer of your own, this is the time to get them. A much better investment then bassinets and changing tables. If you don’t have hook-ups, there are small ones designed for apartments that hook up to the tap in the bathroom or kitchen, and will drain into the bathtub or sink, and you can get a small dryer to match. Use your tax return. You will be doing laundry constantly.

Carter’s makes socks called “Stay-Put.” A baby cannot kick them off if it tries, and normally kicking off socks is a sport in the baby Olympics. They get points for both time and distance.

Also, even if you are breastfeeding, you might want to get one can of powdered formula. Pumping and storing milk is a lot of work, and if Daddy is home with the baby while Mom runs an errand (and really needs the time to herself, even if she’s doing something), it’s nice to know that if she gets stuck in traffic, or something else happens, Dad isn’t dealing with a screaming, hungry baby. Also, things happen. When my son was 14 months old, and didn’t absolutely need to be nursing, but still was, several times a day, I got a bad GI virus, and was vomiting and very dehydrated-- I couldn’t even keep water down. I couldn’t nurse him. He ate food, and had some PediaSure from a bottle for comfort, but if it had happened when he was smaller, he would have needed formula. I was breastfeeding, and I couldn’t keep up with my son at first, so for a while, he had a bottle of formula a day.

Thanks all. To the questions on size of house etc… we’re in a relatively smallish apartment, hence some of the concern of not spending a lot of $$ on things that will just add to our already significant clutter. :slight_smile:

In a pinch, I just used Coffee-Mate. :cool:

Sadly, the baby gadget I anecdotally found most useful was a baby swing-thing. Rocked the kid for a few precious moments of parental peace. :wink: But it takes up room, it does.

Here’s a freebie you may need. We used to keep 2-3 used bread bags (ie from hot dog buns) under the car seat for diaper changes on the move. We could change a diaper in the car seat and put the dirty diaper in a bag to dispose of later when a trash can was available. Beats leaving it on the side of the road or exposed to stink up your car!

Also, get a receipt. They won’t take the little brat back without one.

In a slightly more serious tone, if your parents or in-laws gave it to you without you asking for it then you probably don’t need it.

This is a good reference for new dads. Although the title is a bit facetious, it really is a good book.

Need…

My great great grandmother was born on the Minnesota prairie without wipe warmers or bottles.

You need a way to feed the baby. Breast or bottles and formula or both.
You need to keep baby warm - clothes (I liked baby sacks for a new born), swaddling
You need a way to keep baby clean - we used the kitchen sink and baby shampoo for the whole baby.
You need a car seat - new.
You need a way to carry baby that doesn’t involve holding baby everywhere you go - as newborns this might be the bucket or the car seat or a sling, a little older it could be a wagon or a stroller.
You need diapers - and a way to wash them or dispose of them. And something to take care of wiping after diapers (wipes, washclothes) and diaper cream
You need a safe place for baby to sleep (crib, packnplay, your bed - as newborns a clean floor works if you don’t have pets and won’t step on the baby) and in six months or so, a way to keep a mobile

You need the number of a 20th century pediatrician and whatever that pediatrician recommends you keep in the house as the parent of a baby.

After that you get into a ton of stuff that people find nice to have, “couldn’t have survived without,” or “well, I never used that” - like baby swings which keep some parents of colicky babies sane and other babies just get in them and scream.
Borrow what you can, buy used when you are able (good quality used clothes ARE better than cheap new ones - if you have a neighbor/coworker or relative with a kid about three to six months older and a Gymboree habit, cultivate them.) And start saving for college instead of buying rattles and toys.

and sleep now.

I took a lot of flack for not buying shoes for my kids until they could actually walk. Everyone was convinced their feet were freezing, which they weren’t but you can’t contradict your mother in law can you?

I had twins and everyone at my husband’s company went completely apeshit buying us gifts. Most of them were really lovely but certainly not absolutely necessary. Even with all the bassinets and pack and plays etc, they spent most of their time on a blanket on the floor. Once they started walking baby gates took care of containment. Many things like swings, bouncy chairs and jolly jumpers etc do prove to be useful but for such a short period of time, if you can get them second hand and be sure to pass them along, it makes so much more sense.

They had so many toys I was once asked by a tradesman if I ran a day care! To be fair they played with most of them but as cliched as it sounds, when I bought them the big fancy Playskool kitchen, they spent more time playing in the box it came in.

One thing you don’t need to get baby right away is a drum kit.

Not in the newborn category, but I skipped the high chair. I hated to waste the floor space, so I bought a booster seat that strapped to one of my kitchen chairs. It had a tray like a regular high chair, or I could seat the child at the table with us. I could also take the entire contraption apart and run the pieces through the dishwasher. It was much less expensive than a high chair and perfectly safe.

We got a changing table from Ikea, with a set of drawers for one side, a board, and a support for the other. Used it for both kids and the drawers are still in use 30 years later.

Wipe warmers and diaper genies did not exist when our kids were babies. We managed.
Unless there is some direct need, fancy clothes are definitely not useful. Yard sales around here are full of baby clothes, as well as thrift shops. Agree with that advice.

I don’t know if I +1ed it earlier, but the used clothes idea is great. There are a lot of people out there who buy expensive children’s clothing, and then resell it when their kids outgrow it. So you end up with the better made brands for far less than you could buy the cheaper stuff at Wal-Mart.

Thanks! I have that, it’s actually the only one I bought. Agree, it’s really helpful.

I have a whole library of parenting books I never actually read - or if I read, don’t remember. :smiley:

Oh, that brings to mind: if you register at the big baby stores you get a lot of little freebies. One of the ones in the bag from Buy Buy Baby was a can of formula. We intended to breast feed (which was… let’s go with problematic) but having the can there in the drawer was peace of mind. (See also: we weren’t going to use pacifiers, a ton of which we got for free in the same way.)

Only pre-parents have time to read parenting books.

Which is why the quantity of written material to help you raise your child peters off dramatically from pregnancy books to “how to raise your perfectly normal teenager.”

(There are lots of books written on helping you with kids with special needs - I suspect that the parents don’t usually have time to read them, but they at least buy them - with “perfectly normal” teenagers you just aren’t going to make time to figure out how to feed them and enforce bedtime.