Houston - Humid, hot, polluted, ugly as sin. I know, I lived there for 20 years. It gave me a two decade long sinus headache.
Beaumont, Texas - Twice as humid, hot, polluted, and ugly as Houston and filled with really trashy people.
Oklahoma City - I have nothing good to say about this city. In fact I have nothing at all to say about this city.
Waco, Texas - The only people who live here are either crack heads or crazed Baptists. Some are both. A huge tornado hit it 50 years ago and they never bothered to ever fix it. Waco looks like how every city will look once the zombies take over. Dr. Pepper is the only good that ever came out of Waco.
Newark, New Jersey - Its Newark, I don’t have to elaborate.
Lubbock, Texas - Man I’m bored thing about being in Lubbock again.
Pretty much every city in Lousianna besides New Orleans.
Los Angeles - Really just a glorified Houston. This is a horrible city filled with horrible people. Why do people pay so much to live here? I’ve seen better airports in the Third World. The only good thing that ever came out of LA is me. I don’t understand how these people ever got the idea that they are in competition with New York City.
Take about one eighth of Houston, but keep all the billboards. Remove all the trees. Slap a thick layer of concrete over every exposed patch of dirt that hasn’t been covered with a truck stop, foundation for a 120 foot tall billboard, junkyard, used tire store, strip joint or tractor trailer dealer. Add Juarez next doot, a third world city twice El Paso’s size; a place where tires are burned for heat and the crime rate makes downtown Johannesburg seem like a small Japanese town in comparison.
El Paso is proudly dysfunctional; a place where television commercials for drug and psychiatric treatment hospitals dominate the airwaves. It’s ugly by choice; it has zoning, but allows billboards and business of any size, any height, in just about every place, in the name of commerce.
Of all the cities in the United States, El Paso will provide the most challenge to all of your senses. See for yourself.
Is there anything redeeming El Paso? No. Some might say “great Mexican food,” but the comida Mexicana is much better 40 miles to the north in Las Cruces, New Mexico, an infinitely more liveable and aesthetically pleasing city. Sure, Cruces has its problems. They’re nothing when you consider that a contributing factor to the city’s boom is a flood of former El Paso residents who would rather take an hour-long commute over living in a cesspool.
It’s an evil, nasty, putrid, hellish pit.
I found Martha’s Vineyard merely overhyped. Not bad, but no attractions, either. (Except when compared to the cesspool that is Boston)
I believe, Canberra is a nice place to live, but I wouldn’t want to visit there. That is, if you want a suburban 2.3 kids, a lawnmower, and a dog lifestyle, it’s got cheaper housing, and better infrastructure than Sydney or Melbourne. It’s probably safer too. Canberrans assure me that it’s a great place. I couldn’t even find a pub there, and had to cross the border back into NSW to have a beer.
As a tourist, your assessment Crusoe, is pretty accurate. You can see the sights in a day, and then you’d be wanting to hit the road.
I lived there for five forgettable years. Other than the people, I don’t recall anything memorable about the city. Oh, wait - it had a lake with a water fountain in it.
I wouldn’t say that I hate it, though.
I lived in Canberra for a couple of years and loved it:
- a well educated and politically knowledgeable population;
- great cafés and restaurants;
- interesting galleries and museums;
- very talented local music scene (at least in those areas, classical and choral, that interest me);
- incredible social / sporting infrastructure;
- close to national parks for bushwalking;
- no pollution;
- no traffic problems;
- great weather;
- cost of living considerably cheaper than Sydney etc.
I didn’t find it a boring place to live at all.
Salt Lake City, located in Utah, the state that voted overwhelmingly for W without him ever making a campaign stop there. SLC can be grey and dreary, and the traffic is horrible simply because too many people in too many cars aren’t paying attention to the other drivers on the road. The lack of cultural and ethnic diversity is apalling in this day and age. And believe me, if you are an “outsider” who just happens to move there but doesn’t belong to the right lodge or whatever the heck they call their houses of worship, then you are gonna be feeling pretty isolated. The nicest people in SLC are the ones who moved there from somewhere else. In most places around the country, people of a certain secular belief (naming no names, naming no initials) are generally polite and friendly. In SLC, those same people are more likely to kick the dog and beat the wife. In a cult setting, which trickles over into even public education, repression starts early, I guess.
I never saw so many kids in diapers allowed into apartment swimming pools. My pool was closed for 2 summer months by the health department due to obvious contamination by fecal material. Don’t even get me started talking about the “sisters” shopping at Target (all dressed alike, with the same hairdo) with their 2 dozen kids. Whew. What a nightmare. Like a whole 'nuther planet.
“I was visiting Salt Lake City. I think there was another Latina there, but she was on sabbatical.” - Marga Gomez
You obviously haven’t been here in a while.
Chicago’s wonderful, but I hate to drive there. If I were rich, I’d fly in, and have someone else drive. It would still scare me.
Amarillo, Texas–I heartily second this one. Nothing to recommend it. I would go miles to go avoid this place but fortunately, I no longer have to.
For those of you who hate Fresno, how about Herlong, California? How about Susanville, Calif.? These places are small, it’s true. Small and hatable and far, far from the beach. Fresno is paradise by comparison.
Oklahoma City–I don’t like it, either. I thought Tulsa was okay, though. (When I lived there the state motto on the driver’s license was, “Oklahoma is OK.” That seemed about right. Not great. But OK. Except for OKC.)
You know who just moved to Salt Lake City? Asia Carrera. Tell me that doesn’t say “reality show concept”.
Couple years - I was there immediately after the train/tunnel/explosion incident, and every so often a manhole cover would blow sky high in the street. I don’t blame that on the city in general, but it did contribute to the surreal atmosphere - that and the fire hydrants they let go because of all the gas in the storm drains or something. So, a couple years ago, but not so long.
It took me two weeks before my voice was quite the same.
Cleveland, Ohio. I was born there and grew up in a town 40 miles away. We had to go shopping there a few times a year, and I just hated it. Cold, windy, nasty, smelly, and generally unfriendly. And that miserable loser baseball team they have made me a lifelong baseball non-fan. It did have Jim Brown and Severance Hall, so it isn’t a total loss. But it’s close.
I’ve been there several times since it was ostensibly cleaned up. The stink is still more than I can take. And I live in Houston.
White Plains, New York, a traffic jam with a mayor. Also large swaths of Queens and the Bronx.
I hate Las Vegas. It’s tacky, it smells of vomit and cigarettes, and all the locals are just out to hustle you (I have yet to meet a genuinely friendly person there). I hate that tacky disgusting overrated town. Why do people think it’s so great? Every guy I’ve known who went there for a bachelor party has gotten jacked by a stripper or ripped off somehow. I even know a groom-to-be who had his wallet stolen by a stripper and then got kicked out of the club, and was forced to walk several miles home in the dark. The dance clubs are awful. The cab drivers are awful. Everyone and everything is fake. Yech.
Lethbridge, Alberta is a cesspool. I lived there for many years. It has no culture of any type and is full of christian conservatives. Heck, most of Alberta sucks.
Disclaimer: Alberta Rockies are cool. Edmonton is cool.
I forgot, I hate Columbus, Ohio too. The only redeeming quality it has is that a friend of mine lives there.
I don’t think any of us in L.A. honestly thinks we’re in competition with NYC for the title of America’s Cultural Capital. Overall, no other American city can compete with New York because it’s the biggest, oldest, and richest city and has been that way for centuries. We know that. But we’ve come a long way since 1960, when the city didn’t possess a single art museum.
At the same time, though, I’m not going to defend our Kar Krazy Kulture. I hate that too.