Clean air. Both of my parents each smoked a couple packs of cigarettes daily and Dad also smoked cigars. In a little 2 bedroom house with six people in it in the winter, it would get just awful. It certainly didn’t help anybody’s health any. Now I live in a rural area and I just love how clean the air is out here.
I can have all the ‘meaty’ pieces from a chicken that I want. Although I’ll admit, I still like necks. Dad always got a kick out of the pile of polished vertebrae that remained when I ate the neck; I ate the marrow, too. And steak! A friend convinced me to buy a steak when we were grilling one day, when I was about 24. My first steak ever and yum! I’ve probably had a steak every year since then.
Another person for clothes and shoes. Growing up we had two sets that were alternated daily at the beginning of the school year. At Christmas we would get two or three more. Always just one pair of sneakers that were to last all year.
Now I try to not wear the same outfit to work more than once per month. I have over 40 pairs of shoes. It is an obsession because I have many many things I have never worn but I just like to have them.
Probably slightly higherend mall fashion clothes-BEBE, Blandana Republican and the like. My mom and dad only allowed us to dress from places like Caldor’s (they were one of those regional cheap stores Wallhell drove out of business in the US) and Zellers. If they were feeling generous, we might get an outfit a year from the sales rack at La Bay or Jordan Marsh. Umm, does La Bay even exist anymore? Eaton’s went out of business when I was in undergrad and Jordan Marsh is now Macy’s.
Otherwise not much. We had a really nice childhood. I will say that my parents also don’t believe in lots of gifts and giving children too many toys-we’d get one to share between my sister and I for Xmas and maybe something for our birthdays. Haven’t felt the need to overcompensate, however, as it’s been drilled into me that such things are wasteful and we’re better off saving the money for retirement/college.
One thing I’ve convinced MY parents about? Expensive sneakers properly fitted to your arch are much better for you!
Food cooked for the explicit purpose of tasting delicious, regardless of whether or not you could make a somewhat “healthier” version (that tastes awful) if you used plasticy lowfat cheese instead of real cheese, lowfat skim milk instead of regular milk, lowfat sour cream instead of real sour cream, etc, etc.
(My mom was and is rail thin, as were all of us kids, but she was convinced if we didn’t eat like that we would all get fat, the cardinal sin in her world).
Not only could I not have a minibike, much less a motorcycle when I was a kid, I was grounded for weeks at a time whenever my parents caught me riding a friend’s. I wanted one so bad I would have dreams about them.
So the first thing I did when I was 19 and living on my own was go out and buy a fuel-injected, 1000 cc Kawasaki Z-1 Classic and toured the American West.
Dining out with the kids, I think. We were desperately poor, and for us, dining out meant Captain D’s once a month (if we were lucky). I remember once, my mother talked Dad into taking us to Pizza Hut – we walked in, sat down, he looked at the menu, and decided we couldn’t afford it, and we all walked out – such humiliation. I will scrimp on other things to be sure my kids get the experience of dining out in nice (read: The Melting Pot) places regularly, as well as average (read: Chili’s) places so that they feel comfortable. My first real date, I was horrified that he just dropped money on the table as we walked out – what if someone took it? Shouldn’t he have paid at a register? I actually didn’t realise that’s how it works in a real restaurant. Ugh.
Aside from that, I think it’s clothing. I was the youngest of four and unwanted to boot. If I had clothes, they were hand-me-downs from cousins, because I wasn’t good enough to get my sister’s old clothes – those went to Goodwill. From the time I was 11, and able to make money babysitting on, I bought all of my own clothing, hygiene supplies, etc – you don’t wear name brands if you have to buy your stuff with babysitting money. My kids get whatever clothes they like (and look good in) and I know it’s overcompensation, but they’re good kids and have never asked for the $100 jeans or whatnot, so it’s cool.
Quiet free time. It didn’t matter how old or young we were, free time spent alone not doing anything at all was a precious commodity that we rarely got to enjoy. Yes, we got to play with our friends a lot, but sometimes I just wanted to be alone where it was quiet and I could think. However, if I was home, I was required to help with the household chores. Didn’t matter how old or young I was - if my mom was working, I was supposed to be working, too, and she was, and still is, one of those people who cannot hold still. If I wasn’t doing household chores, but was watching TV or something, I was supposed to be sewing or practicing knitting or crocheting. I still remember getting my first embroidery pattern at 4 years old - it was a donkey carrying a bunch of fruit. Before that, my busywork was to roll yarn and learn how to make a long string of crocheted yarn. My mom didn’t think I’d go to hell or anything for not being busy, but she’s never been able to fathom being quiet and still so you could think. She still can’t. I used to stay up into the wee hours just to get some silence while I was conscious. So now I feel really antsy if I’m not doing something. Although my son helps with a lot of things, even at 2 and 1/2, I still try to give him a lot of time to play and do nothing if he wants to.
Also, when I began dating my husband at 22 (has it been that long already?), I learned for the first time that vegetables that weren’t a salad could taste good. Previously I had thought they needed to be boiled to within an inch of their lives and/or covered in glop. Indian food was a revelation. I still remember him saying that he’d never met a vegetable he didn’t like. I goggled at him, but understood what he meant when I had my first taste of vindaloo.
Definitely shoes. When I was a kid, I had maybe 3 pairs at any given time: one “regular” pair, one pair of gym shoes, and a dressup pair. Now I have a ridiculous number of shoes. Part of it is because of my screwed-up ankle; sometimes a pair will feel fine in the store, but start to hurt after I wear them for an hour or two, so they sit in my closet. And part is because I still have a bunch of everyday shoes that I bought before I got prescription orthotics, and that don’t fit with the orthotics - I have been giving them away, little by little (luckily Mom wears my size, but doesn’t always have my taste). But I should really wear out some of the ones I have before I buy any more, even if they are cute, on major sale, and would go perfectly with some outfit or another.
Ya know, I almost said shoes, but then I realised that even as a teenager, the majority of my spending money went to shoes. Just call me Imelda, no joke, I have a shoe addiction. At least I am a frugal shopper – recently I got 7 pairs of shoes (at DSW) for under $35. Not under $35 per pair, but for the whole lot. Plus, since my daughter and I wear the same size and have similar taste, all the shoes get double-duty. I justify well, don’t I?
On one hand, we could well afford all our necessities, attended a lot of local activities, were provided with more toys than we needed, were encouraged to read & listen to music & have friends, and all good things.
But when I was a kid, we could only comfortably afford one big sightseeing multi-state vacation. I think that was the summer vacation before I was in fifth grade, and is was through the Kentucky caves & Tennessee tourist attractions, including the Onyx caves, various wax museums, etc. It seems corny now, but we loved it.
In 1995, unfortunately 3 years after Dad’s death, Mom & I splurged on a L.A. vacation where my brother lives. Now we do that almost every year. I do regret Dad didn’t live to do that. OR to experience the Internet. He’d have LOVED it!
Grew up poor (althought I really didn’t know it)
2nd hand clothes.
No vacations.
Always leftovers until it was all gone.
But we always had fresh chicken, vegetables, and fruit - we grew our own.
Breads were also home cooked.
No TV until 1962 (I was 8)
But I really wanted a guitar - and saved what little paper route money I made to buy one from a friend - $15.
They wouldn’t pay for lessons for “such a waste of time and money”
Taught myself, and I played every moment that I could. I wanted it that bad.
Now it’s how I make a living. And a damn good one.
Privacy, even if I have nothing to be ashamed of.
Albacore tuna, even though it costs more.
Eating when I’m hungry, and not having to wait until a specified mealtime lest I “spoil my appetite”.
Eating what I enjoy eating, not what my dad likes (and everyone else hates).
Pepsi - We were not allowed to drink it unless we were eating seafood. We had to drink milk at every meal.
My Dad convinced Mom that we would get sick if we had milk and seafood together, so it was the only time
we were allowed Pepsi. (Thanks Dad! )
Air Conditioning - We had a window unit that was only turned on 4 or 5 days a year, and only for a few hours
at a time. (Thanks Dad :rolleyes: )
My mom had a flying phobia and instilled it in me. Even though as a child I loved to travel, I was afraid to fly. It took several years after moving out to talk myself out of it, and she still tried to convince me I was going to die any time I boarded a plane. So, for a decade or so I flew somewhere at any opportunity. I had had enough driving vacations as a child, and I was happily overcompensating. I saw France, Germany and Hawaii for the first time!
TV, we didn’t have a tv in the house until I was 10. Even after that it was rationed. I used to go over to other kid’s houses and want to watch tv instead of playing. As an adult I still love it and it just keeps getting better.
Fresh herbs, and spices of all kinds. Also ethnic foods. I don’t cook much stuff at home that’s bland American food like my mom used to make.
Air travel. My parents always drove us kids everywhere. I hated it, because I got carsick and couldn’t read in the car. Queasy and bored is not a fun combination. Now, if I’m going somewhere much further than Columbus, OH (3.5 hours), I fly if at all possible.
Foreign travel. I never went outside the US until I was 21. From 2000 to 2007, I went on a foreign trip almost every year.
Sports! My dad would watch the occasional Israeli soccer game once we got Israeli satellite, and I guess I’d watch the Super Bowl with friends every year, but that was just about it. My dad wasn’t American, and none of my friends were sports fans, so I never really grew up watching sports. When I started college, I knew the basic rules of most sports (due to video games and some watching), but nothing about the history, the teams, the players, or anything. Somewhere between my 2nd and 3rd year of college, I suddenly realized what I was missing. Now there’s hardly anything that goes on in the sports world I don’t know about, and I spend a lot of time reading up on sports history to get myself up to speed. I spend my weekends watching football, and never miss a big game. I became an Atlanta pro sports fan (and not just in name only, as I had been my whole life, but actually watching games, reading blogs, knowing everything going on).
The other thing? Pets, but I haven’t overcompensated for that yet. I really want to get a dog, but am waiting until I get out of college until I do. I know that once I get out, I definitely will be getting one, as both my mom and sister hate dogs and I never was able to get one growing up.
)