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- Well first off, being a boss is a different job than being a worker, as noted.
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- But anyway…he should quit.
… - If he wants to be helpful, then quit and then fire a parting shot: send a message directly to the top saying that he quit just because of his boss. They may not like her either - there’s a small chance they may ditch her and ask him to come back, but don’t expect it. “Jumping rank” (going over an immediate supervisor’s head) is not something to do unless you are quitting–your boss may be worthless, but reporting it to their boss makes the top person feel you are untrustworthy and undependable.
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I have to disagree with DougC. The “parting shot” is never a good idea. Stay and fix the problem, or walk away and say “thanks for opportunity to learn and grow here. I will be seeking opportunities outside the company, but wish you all the best.”
Also, FWIW, “managing up” has been brought up a couple of times but explained quite differently than I have always understood the term. Basically manging up is when you very carefully steer your boss into making good decisions. Think of Radar O’Reilly and LtCol Blake. Your boss may well not even realize that they’re being “managed,” but the team does better, and this is usually a good thing for everyone on it – boss and employee alike.
While I’m feeling grumpy, I have to say I am glad I’m not working with Meta-Grumble (“Covering for your boss (or anyone) is bullshit”). I cover for coworkers all the time. And they cover for me. It’s not bullshit - it’s what a good organization does to survive.
No one else has answered this, and as it happens I’m an employee of a very small non-profit.
Non-profits are always worried about making money, because they need money to cover their operating costs. We, for instance, stage avant garde music concerts–the kind of thing there’s no profit in any way you slice it, but contributes to the cultural experiences of people who live here. We try to keep the ticket prices low so that students can afford to come and to encourage people to come out and hear the stuff. At the same time, we try to pay the musicians a decent fee, and we also have to pay rental to venues, rent any needed equipment, etc. Our costs far exceed our income from ticket sales, we do get some grants but at the end of the year we’re still trying to cover those expenses. So you can bet that’s a major preoccupation of the board, trying to get money enough to keep doing what we do without compromising the purpose of the organization. I’m sure large non-profits aren’t much different, and have even larger costs to cover.
Psychologically sound procedures for problem solving…
Maybe you’d like to shed some light on this assertion and how it should pertain to our discussion? Just because we are both psychologists doesn’t mean we are superhuman. It goes with the same assertion my mother-in-law always says to me…Stop shrink’in my head with all that psycho-babble. i.e. - it simply doesn’t work with everyone. Lest not forget my friends boss is not on a couch in front of him. They are in a work environment.
Well, sitting there and allowing a problem to grow into a bigger problem certainly isn’t a good idea.
Maybe instead of bringing problems to the manager, you should bring solutions. ie instead of “we don’t have enough ball-bearing grease” try"we can decrease downtime by 10% if we purchase 5 gallons more grease a month - resulting in a 8% increase in revenue." No one likes being given a laundry list of complaints.
If you boss is still disinterested or even hostile then fuck him. Just make sure no problems can come back and bite you in the ass.
I have to agree with Dogman. Good managers hire people who are experts in their job. Then they give the direction and the tools to do that job.
Oh and with my Mr 69% done manager - he also happened to be an abusive jerk. Eventually the entire team complained to the Partner in charge of the project. The Partner basically told him “There seems to be a problem with the team. Since I can’t get rid of the entire team, I am going to get rid of YOU unless you figure out a way to get along with them.” Unfortately, now we had a jerk who wanted to be “best pals” with us but it was the right idea. If you have a problem manager and it is threatening the project, it usually is more effective if you can have the entire team bring it to the attention of their superior.
On the other hand, it still may do no good. At another consulting firm I worked at, my manager was a complete incompetant. I knew it. The team knew it. The other managers knew it. The projects director knew it. Even worse, the clients knew it. The project director even asked me if I think she should be removed. I told him “well…I haven’t really been here long enough to comment on her management style, but I support whatever decision you make;)”. Turns out she was connected to an equally incompetant and connected director so she stayed.
This is how I define it too. I call it “managing from below.”
My current boss used to be my peer a couple of years ago. We both put in for the manager’s position but he was obviously much more in tune with administrative work, while I was more of a hands on kind of worker. I’d say that I do know more about the inner workings of the technology in our company than he does, so he generally just tells me the goals of our projects and lets me come up with the ideas and implementations.
However, he seems to be getting sucked up into the managerial fantasy world of how things work on paper rather than in the real world. During our short staff meetings every week I generally have to reinterpret everything from manager-speak to employee-speak for every one else (I’m the only senior tech in the IT department). I’ve also increasingly had to arbitrate problems between fellow workers. Although I’m not technically a supervisor, that seems to be the role I’m taking on.
Which brings up another point I wanted to make, and that is taking care of problems at the lowest possible level. This was a valuable technique I learned in the military. The less problems make their way into upper management, the less shit that rolls downhill towards you.
My advice to the OPer’s friend, though, is that if he really likes his job to sit down with his boss and have an open, frank discussion about his problem with her. Psychology degrees aside, two mature adults should be able talk this through, though I know that’s not always the case. I mentioned before that I have to intervene sometimes between co-workers, and a current situation is a petty squabble between two people 15 years my senior! If things don’t work out in the discussion, he can part ways amicably and start looking for another job, or grin and bear it hoping that his boss’s boss will notice the incompetence. There’s no need for going behind the boss’s back unless she is truly hurting the company.
I’ve never met anyone who wasn’t smarter than the boss.
I’m not sure what it is that you think that I am “asserting.” But I am willing to look at the facts if you are. Again, no offense intended.
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You and your friend have degrees in psychology, if I understand correctly.
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Psychology is the science of mind and behavior.
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No one gets a degree in psychology without being exposed to basic techniques of problem-solving and emotional intelligence – just as you would not get a degree in biology without using a microscope or similarly functioning mechanism.
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The problem that you have presented for discussion (which is certainly appropriate for SDMB) is a very common problem. Most people with college degrees will run across this very same basic situation from time to time.
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The problem is so ordinary that it does not require “superhuman” abilities.
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The problem belongs to your friend, not to your friend’s boss. He needs to make decisions about his working situation. No couch required for anyone. He, as a psychologist – as an adult, for that matter – should be perfectly capable of using some traditional problem-solving techniques to work this out.
It is natural, however, to share life’s troubles with our friends and that is what he has done. He’s has talked to you about it. The two of you seem to have thought through some options because some of the suggestions that were made here were dealt with quickly as not being appropriate solutions. Good.
But instead of you two behavioral scientists being able to come to some conclusion about appropriate means of dealing with this, it is presented here – which is your right, but which does seem strange. It is a little like two etymologists not being able to figure out how to swat a fly.
There are volumes written on problem-solving. But if you need a few suggestions for techniques such as assumption elimination, attribute listing, problem reversal, etc., you might read here:
http://members.tripod.com/~eng50411/psolving.htm
Please do not let this discourage you from discussing some of these problems here. Not only could the responses be helpful to you, but others in similar situations also.