Is it me? It's me, isn't it.

The BBQ Pit
1

I love my job. I loved my job. I was a salesgirl in a store that sells dancewear. I was a dancer for 15 years, with training in ballet, jazz, tap and modern. I learned everything I could about the stock, and about which studios require what kind of attire.
I spent my days happily fitting four year olds with their first pair of ballet slippers. Little darlings would smile at me. Parents would thank me for my help. People described me as “friendly”, “cheerful”, and “easy to get along with”.

A customer came in with a tracing of her child’s foot, and asked me to fit shoes to it. I had never fit shoes to a tracing before, I had only worked with real feet. Mrs. Customer was from out of town, and couldn’t possibly bring Little Suzy in with her.
Because I had no experience, I politely asked the customer to wait until the manager was no longer busy, and then she could be helped. Apparently, the customer was miffed by my efforts to not screw her over by selling her the wrong thing.

Today my boss pulled me aside and told me that this customer was walking around telling everyone that I am “unhelpful”, and not to visit the store while I am working there.

Woah, hello, WTF?

This story was related to my boss by a crony of hers who has badmouthed me in the past.
Miss Crony came into the store one day and we were making polite conversation when I casually mentioned to her that I was going to be attending a Hot Ticket concert. I told her that I felt grateful to have gotten my hands on tickets, and that I was excited to be going. Miss Crony told my boss that I was “spun”, and “out of control” when I was telling her about my lucky ticket score. Zuh? Whaaaat? Other confused noises? What conversation were you having, Crony? Did you temporarily fall into an alternate reality? because in the convo I had with you, I felt all the exuberance of Alastair Cooke.

Maybe Crony has it in for me. Could she? But why?

This incident of hearsay, coupled with two mistakes I made on the job last month, have led to my resignation, under duress from my boss. How can I possibly keep working there, when I know that my presence is chasing customers away?

Even more frightening than my impending unemployment, is the fact that I feel compelled to second-guess myself. I thought I was doing a pretty good job. I thought customers were walking away happy. Oh my god, am I crazy? Am I completely out of touch with reality? How can I fix this? What if I can’t function in the Real World, because my personality/psyche/logic processes (whatever) are inherently flawed?

I am so confused.

2

So you get at least one reply…

Dont worry about those idiots, and if your boss believes them without knowing your side of things, he’s an idiot too. The world is full of them.

She might have it out for you, but there really isn’t much you can do except make sure your boss knows your side of things. Unless you want to confront this lady, to which I say go for it!

Dave

3

Well, you qoute Buffy in your sig, so you’re obviously doing something right. Based on that fact alone, I’m willing to make up my mind that you were a bright, diligent employee unfairly screwed over by her idiot boss and his revolting side-kick. You were too good for that place; go get a new job at a place that only employs super-cool people (you could make manager, there) and don’t look back.

4

Nice Miller.
Gotta love the thick sarcasm.

5

The best part was when Miller assumed that I said I was perfect (I’m not), and then decided s/he knew everything about the situation. The sig crack was fabulous too. I give it a 10!

Sarcasm is the asshole’s wit. – Oscar Wilde

6

How did you guys figure out Miller was being sarcastic? Was there a [sarcasm] tag I couldn’t see? Do you guys have some negative history? Or are you just jumping him for no fucking reason?

–John

7

So John . . . how 'bout them Mariners, huh? Some catch Ichiro made last night. Hoo boy.

8

I think the tip-off was when he took one or two small points from the situation and stretched them to hyperbole.
Not to mention making fun of my (former) sig, assuming that I want a managerial position (hell no, I’d rather be on the floor any day), implying that I think I am lily-white and my boss is full of shit.

In my actual post, I admitted to making mistakes on the job. I wanted to make it clear that I don’t think my boss is evil, I am just confused. To discover that your perception of reality jars so much with someone else’s is disconcerting.

9

Wow, I wasn’t even trying to be sarcastic! I’m that good at it! My genuine apologies if I offended, Lola, I was just trying to be funny. In all seriousness, I do think you got screwed over by your boss and co-worker, and thought a little unconditional support from a random stranger might make you feel better.

And that wasn’t a sig crack, either. I love Buffy. I’m watching it right now. The one with the ventriloquist dummy.

“I know Principal Flutie would have said, ‘Kids need understanding. Kids are human beings.’ That’s the kind of wooly-headed liberal thinking that leads to being eaten.”

10

Um, I didn’t think Miller was being sarcastic at all. In fact I found his post to be quite supportive in a humerous fashion.

11

I suppose ramrod-straight Nazi thinking has the same result as wooly-headed liberal thinking! LOL.

Apologies to you, fine Miller. Yikes, I’ve been rendered cynical by all this lurking. I suppose a newbie can’t be too careful, especially on this board (did you know the SDMBers are known on other MBs for being hard on newbies?). Please let me curtsy to you and heartily wish you a good night! :smiley:

This post has been declared sarcasm-free by the Strunk-White Institute for Literary Criticism

12

No problems, lola, an understandable mistake. No hard feelings on this end. Although I think this:

seems to be an ongoing problem, no? :wink:

13

What are the odds?

Two Lolas on this board and they’re both Buffyites.

Welcome to the board KFLola, I’m sorry about your job woes but it may be better for your own sanity that you don’t have to deal with these pinheads.

Stress can be a killer.

BTW: This is one of my favourite quotes:

“I know Principal Flutie would have said, 'Kids need understanding. Kids are human beings. 'That’s the kind of wooly-headed liberal thinking that leads to being eaten.”

Again, welcome.

14

Yeah, me too. Does “under duress from my boss” mean that your boss wanted you to quit or not? Cause if your boss didn’t want you to quit, then I think you jumped the gun. Fuck what the crony thinks, as long as your boss knows the truth.

Then again, if your boss wanted you to quit, you should have forced her to fire you. Just for spite. Then you could have told crony what you thought of her.

15

I sure didn’t. What MBs, Lola?

16

I think I have some idea of what you’re feeling. I tend to be a pretty absolute thinker, so one bad event can color my perception of the past and my own capabillity. For example, I have a co-worker who must just be super-unhappy, and talks crap about me (and others). It hurts me that she says these things to people who may only hear from her, and believe it. And for awhile I felt that maybe she was right. But I have to believe too that people who are fair will realize where she’s coming from and take things with a grain of salt.

You know from past customer comments that you were doing fine. One crusty person comes along and has her own agenda, and that means it’s not you, it was you caught in her trap.

I echo the question, is your boss calling for your resignation, or against it? Let her fire you, don’t quit.

And rest assured, in all likelihood, it’s not you.

17

Yeah - don’t quit; Not that I support living off unemployment or welfare, but if they want you to leave, they should have to pay for it;

There is an amazing thing out there called “supportive management” - those are the managers who actually BELIEVE and stand by their ‘underlings’. I have been extremely blessed by having found them in most of my jobs. I would not tolerate a boss who did not believe me, or suspected the worst of me, or believed the client/customer over me. You shouldn’t either!

Best o’luck,

18

It didn’t occur to me for a single second that Miller was being anything other than nice, welcoming, and warmly supportive. In fact, when I read the subsequent posts accusing him of having been sarcastic and/or mean, I had to closely examine those posts to see if they were being sarcastic. But then, I’ve been around here long enough to be aware that Miller is a nice and warmly supportive guy pretty much all the time. Even, apparently, in the Pit.

A valuable lesson to be learned, kung fu lola. On the SDMB, think twice before you leap to conclusions. When I was in Little League playing outfield, they told us that when a fly ball got hit to us, to always take the first step back. Because if you misjudge the ball and have to sprint to catch it, it’s a lot easier to sprint forwards than backwards. Similarly, it’s always best on the SDMB to begin by assuming people are being nice rather than assuming they’re being complete dickheads and deserving of your scorn. It’s much easier to whip out the 'thrower once you realize the person you’ve been treating nicely actually is an asshole than it is to apologize and try to make nice once you’ve mistakenly taken offense.

Trust me. You’ll be happier.

19

Andros, I really want to be discreet… oh no, I think I have something caught in my throat cough SAAN cough cough dotmusic cough cough cough…
This is not to say that the entire board is gossiping about you lovely people. In fact, I have heard more concrete statements from my “Net friends” on ICQ. I have two friends who lurked for a while and then left without registering, because they felt “too stupid” and intimidated to post here.

Anyway…

My boss hasn’t fired me. She never fires anyone except as an absolute last resort.
When she tells me that I am “chasing away customers” because of my shortcomings, and says that someone was overheard telling people not to visit the store when I am working, I don’t feel I have any choice but to leave.
If I am hurting the store’s reputation just by being there, how can I possibly stay? My mandate while I was working there was 1) To satisfy the customers 2) To do what was best for the business and 3) To make my boss’s life easier. If the fact that I am on the clock is hurting the store, it is unconscienable for me to stay. How can I pick up my paycheck and take my boss’s money when I might be causing her to lose money? That would weigh heavily on my conscience.

20

I thought the same thing at first. I read Miller’s post and thought, “Aww, you guys are so nice!”. And then I read what gtzaskar00 had posted. I thought maybe he knew something about Miller that I did not, being a lowly and humble newbie. Dammit, should’ve gone with my first impression!
**“In fact, I have heard more concrete statements from my “Net friends” on ICQ.”

Should read; “I have heard concrete statments from my “Net friends” on ICQ, but posts on the actual boards have been vague.”**