My new boss is a dick. (long, boring)

The BBQ Pit
1

Ok muthafucka. You have been in your job a month. We have had two meetings and they have both not gone well.

First off I work for a bank. I am in sales. I was a top loan (refi, equity lines, business lines of credit, purchase money) producer until the bottom fell out of the market…AND I only wrote good business, able to sleep at night knowing I did the right thing for people, even if it meant counseling them to save money and not borrow from me.

After the loan market collapsed I REMAINED a top producer in our other lines of business. In all areas where we are objectively measures I am in the top 5%, somtimes in the #1 position. I do an excellent job.

So you, fuckwit, come onto the scene from a peripheral position. You know vaguely what I do, and you are a manager and your job is to help me with MY job, or coach me if needed.

Your first day you come to my office with your boss. I tell you about an equity line I am trying to get closed for a guy in time for him to pay college tuition for his daughter. All of the requirements are in and documented, but in our (GINORMOUS) bank’s infinite wisdom, we decided to start doing loans without hiring any underwriters. So My customer’s deal languishes on some desk without being looked at. So I give you a chance to shine in front of your boss, asking you to swing your big-manager-dick around a bit and get an underwriter to look at my deal since it is time sensitive. You proceed to lecture me at length about how I could have made this deal go smoother. Except you have never originated or processed a loan in your fucking life and you are completely talking out of your ass! Yeah I called you out on it front of your boss, but if you don’t want to look like a fool, don’t try to make me look like one. But I did learn that after working for many bosses who believed if they can make me look good, they in turn look good as well, I finally have a boss that wants to make himself look good by making me look bad…point well taken.

My bank is merging another bank. Our loan processes are combining as well. It is very confusing. It is next to impossible to get anything approved, and it is like navigating a maze of horseshit and razorwire to make progress. The VAST majority of people in my position are still focusing on other lines of business waiting for more clarity before they start doing loans, but no not me. I am still trying to do what is right for the customer, even if it is a loan.

But this particular gentleman, even though he has good credit and plenty of value in his house, was turned down because he has a high amount of revolving credit (AKA credit cards debt). So he tells me he is going to sue. (whatever, dude) So I send an email to my boss filling him in so he isn’t blindsided by this guy.

He comes into my office today unannounced at 5:00 and tells me we need to call the customer. OK, no problem. He goes in another office and calls me in. When I get in there he is talking to the customer. HELLO? Don’t you want to talk to me to get some details? Find out what happened? But ok, you want to wing it. I’m cool with that.

The call goes on for 30 minutes and I just sit there. The air condition is on WAY cool and at one point I wrap my arms around myself and rub my arms a bit.

So he gets off the phone and says, “So do you want to tell me your side of the story?” Ummm, my side? I didn’t turn the guy down, the new guidelines did. Well the customer was pissed and embellished a few details, saying I told him he was approved, which I did nt do. He also said I didn’t return his call promptly, but his expectation was a return call within an hour, which just is ot reasonable.

So I start to tell Mr. Boss Man what happened and he cuts me off saying that he believes the customer and doesn’t want to hear my excuses. Huh? What the…? Are you kidding me?

He said he was concerned because this is the second customer issue I have had. MOTHERFUCKER THE FIRST ISSUE WAS ME ASKING YOU FOR HELP, NOT A CUSTOMER COMPLAINT. I FUCKING CALLED YOU! The second is a disgruntled guy who got turned down. So you know what? I am joining the ranks of the rest of your crew, and just avoiding loans. Do 'em yourself, or explain to your manager why your team is not producing.

Then to cap it all off he says, “You must respect me, and it is innapropriate for you to yawn while I am on the phone with a customer.” I said, “I didn’t yawn.” He said “I am pretty sure you did.” I said “I shivered a little because its cold in here”. He said, “That was disrespectful.”

Fuck off.

2

I would say you need to be extremely careful around this man. He is in the position of having to manage people with more expertise than he has, and that is not an acceptable balance of power for any manager.

He’s going to make your job depend on anything but that expertise…ass kissing, picayune procedure, slights real or imagined.

I might start keeping a list of such incidents, just in case it ever comes time to go to HR.

3

Document everything. Cultivate a positive professional relationship with his boss. This guy will sell you out in a heartbeat.

4

“You must respect me?”
This, in and of itself would set my hair aflame.

5

Yeah, good advice in the previous answers.

I’d be, out of experience, very, very wary of a boss that demands respect without doing anything whatsoever to earn it.

Be careful.

6

Like others have said, document everything (I know it’s a PITA, but it’s useful - I was once in a similar position). If it’s legal where you are, voice record every conversation (even if it’s not legal where you are, I would consider it - you don’t need to go to court with it, you just need HR to hear it off the record somehow).

7

“Fastest way to prove that you don’t deserve respect is to demand it” - me.
“I’m sorry, I’m Human and I have Human reactions. If this is a problem, please take it up with HUMAN resources.”

8

Never mind recording and documenting - just start interviewing. This cannot end well.

9

Another vote for keeping notes and documenting everying. sorry to hear about your situation.

10

True words; it appears the handwriting it already on the wall, and the handwriting says ‘YOUR BOSS IS A DICK.’ Oh sorry, that was your thread title.

Anyway, I agree, your boss is a dick. Where’d your old one go? Time to dust off the resume and rolodex–or alternatively, spend some serious time and effort going toe to toe in office politics with this retard. Option 1 is probably less risky but ymmv.

11

Right, documenting is useless. Get a transfer or apply at another bank.

You can have solid 100% proof your boos is a dickwad, and absent defalcation or racial/sexual discrimination, they won;t do anything. YOU are an employee, HE is a manager. You are thus wrong, he is thus right. At best you can take him down with you. At worst, you’re fired and you’ll find it hard to get another job.

Get out NOW!

12

Because of the merger, districts were realigned recently. His job before was managing the service people (tellers, bank managers, etc.) I am in sales. I have my series 7 and 66, life and health, and various other designations. He has no clue how to do what I do, much less manage me. But I don’t have a problem with that. I know the technical aspects, I need him to help my with systematic breakdowns like when I can’t get an underwriter to look at a deal. But because he doesn’t understand what I do, I think he is trying to put me on the defensive by being a dick.

My last 2 managers (who NEVER had a cross word for me) are in adjacent districts that are still really close. Actually just across town. But I live in the community where I work and people know me. Over the years I have built up a base of clientel. To move would be a huge setback.

We have HR mediation available. I think I am going to try to set up a meeting and try to get the relationship back on track. At the least I will have something on file with my grievances. But once you go the HR route, I know it can get ugly. As has been said before, he is management. But I know for sure there have been many other HR complaints lodged against him.

Who knows? The thing is, I have never had to work for a person who manages from what appears to be insecurity. Its a “gotcha” mentality. I guess I have to be on my toes. The good thing is I see him less than once a week…so there’s that.

13

Maybe give your last two managers a call? I mean for advice. They higher up in the organization than this guy is? It might be worth it to save his job and yours.

14

I’d go the mediation route. And the sooner the better. You have your past to back you up and who knows… it could resolve itself nicely for you. Just remember to keep it professional and impersonal. Present facts, not emotions. Remain calm, even when you want to throttle the idiot(s).

15

It won’t, it can’t. Even if the OP gets a transfer or a new boss, he will then get a rep as being difficult to work with, and a complaint filer. But what they will do is talk with them both and of course the Boss will agree to whatever they say. But 100% of the power stays with the manager. Life will become a living hell. Bad evaluations will follow. The OPs work history will go down the toilet.

Get out now.

16

You are so fucked, one way or another. The only thing I can even imagine helping is going immediately to HR, but then you risk being a “problem employee”.

17

The OP isn’t some entry-level flunky moving into an established organization. He’s a professional who has several licenses and designations that make him employable just about anywhere he cares to go, and a Rolodex of clients and contacts who may very well come with him. It also sounds like newcrasher is responsible for developing many of those clients and probably all of his contacts, so if he leaves, it can be devastating to the bank.

Since that is the case, a mediation may very well go in his favor, especially since Dick Manager has already interfered with an established client’s ability to get a loan closed. However, as you rightly pointed out, it’s not a good way to make a good impression in a new organization.

ISTM that Dick moved from an area where his presence and authority were required more than they are now. He can’t grasp that change, so instead of learning about newcrasher and what his new area does, he’s gracing transactions with his presence where it’s not required, and doesn’t understand that it’s actually interfering with the new department’s business.

18

I have been with the bank for years, so I am not a new entry into the company.

My past managers are not the same level as my current boss, and they all share the same job, but in different districts.

I think my best chance is to call him and say we got off on the wrong foot, and ask if we can talk about it so we can have a more productive relationship. I kiss his ass a little, keep producing, and he finds another target to pound in the ass. All he wants is me to be submissive to him. I have a wife and kid and can’t lose the job.

meh…

19

Into what?

20

Last time I got a new boss mid-job, in our first meeting he told me “I don’t like you, and I don’t need you.” I thought he was kidding, since he had never met me in his life. I said “You really should give me a chance, most people take at least 2 weeks to figure out that they don’t like me.” That went over like the proverbial lead balloon. He ended the conversation by telling me I made too much money, and that the following week I would be on a new “Pay and performance bonus” schedule.

Resumes went out the following night, I had my first interview that Friday, and accepted a new position within a week. He fired me before I got a chance to quit, but I didn’t miss a day of work.

I’d start keeping my ears open for new opportunities, especially if they’re within your bank. It’s fairly obvious that you’re not going to respect him (for good reason, don’t take that wrong!) and that he’s a tool who wants his way, even if it’s wrong.