Because, even while I was pregnant, even now that I’m four months postpartum, I catch him staring lustfully at me at least twice a day. 
Sometimes every five minutes.
Because he has a completely terrible sense of humour, and childlike glee in awful puns.
Because he loves books, words, and writing, and takes them all very seriously.
Because he also takes me seriously, and also doesn’t hesitate to let me know- gently and tactfully- when I’m being ridiculous.
I love that…
when I was nauseas and only was able to get to the kitchen linoleum (not to the sink) he tucked me in bed, brought me a glass of water & a bucket, then cleaned up the floor. :o
he got up early (after working late the night before) to help me say goodbye before we had our beloved, ill pet put to sleep. 
he offered to go beat up a mean-spirited guy at work who said something rude that really upset me (no, he wouldn’t really beat them up, but it made me smile all the same). 
he loves me in spite of my occasional craziness. 
How do I love thee, let me count the ways . . .
First thought is his twinkly eyes. I call them elfin. They’re a medium hazel that just takes on this . . . quality, especially when he smiles that shit-eating grin of his. He kind of looks like an elf to me, or maybe a hobbit, which I know he would like to be.
He can’t keep his hands off me, and he calls me “babe,” even though I’m . . . not one.
He’s thoughtful and kind, and can always see when someone needs attention. He’s kind to animals, children, and little old ladies. (Especially in his new job as a nursing assistant.)
He’s smart and witty, and he has a phenomenal memory for history, politics, movies, music, books . . . People are always surprised to learn that he didn’t go to college.
He built most of our house with his own two hands.
He once called me into the kitchen to show me the bubbles in his freshly made espresso. He once spent an hour drawing a dead spider in a window . . .and another hour finishing the drawing after the dead spider got up and crawled away. He gets joy out of the little things.
I think the best thing is that he loves me for who and what I am, not in spite of it, and he never wants me to change. That blows me away. I was always a square peg and figured I’d have to stifle myself to be acceptable. But he loves it when I let my freak flag fly.
Incubus, she sounds fantastic! Good on you!
I get to meet Guitar Mommy’s kids today. I already spent a little time with her son, but today I’ll meet the daughter as well. I’m a little nervous about it, because the entire relationship hinges on whether I’m going to be a good influence on her life. I hope that all I need to do is have a warm heart and give her the respect that I’d give any adult. Oh, and listen to whatever she has to say.
His drive is the biggest thing about him I admire, and, in effect, love. He decides he wants to achieve something and he does it. If he fails, he tries harder without being negative about himself. He decided he wanted to quit his well paying job and be a fire fighter. He did it. He decided he wants to do triathlons, so he started taking tri-swimming training (his weakest aspect) and now he’s one of the faster swimmers in his class of super athletes. He wants to be on the dive team at the fire department and wanted to apply even though he wasn’t yet out of his first year (still on probation). He talked to the Sergeant in charge of the dive team, proved himself, and was allowed to apply. And he got accepted! He starts training this month. He just decides he wants to do something and just…does it. It’s amazing. I want to be like that.
I also love that he’s put up with my issues for six years. My problem with alcohol and eating disorders, my on and off smoking. I was a pretty bad girlfriend for a while there, but he stuck by me and he loves me. He proposed and I accepted, and I think that cemented his resolve that he’s going to help me get better and we’re going to have a great life together. I want to be driven like him and do all the things in life that I want to do.
To be honest, the thing I love most about Derek is that he makes me try to be a better me.
That right there. That is so important.
A lot of cynical people might read that and think that that’s a narcissistic attitude, that you just need someone to make you feel better about yourself. But it’s not. If you can find someone that will inspire you to become the best you that you can be, then you’ve found someone that you can love on a really deep level.
He just “gets” me. I’m not sure how to explain it any better than that. A friend calls it “married ESP” (we’ve been married almost 17 years), but we had it even before. This example is actually from after we were married, but the phenomenon predates the wedding: I was trying to describe something, and I said, “You know, it’s like that guy…in that movie…” while I was racking my brain for the name of the actor or the film. Immediately, he said, “Yeah, Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil, the Jack Thompson character.” I can do it to him, too.
I get horrendous motion sickness. He just deals with it.
His sense of humor is so highly developed - when I do make him laugh out loud, it feels like an enormous compliment.
Because he loves me and has put up with me for 26 years, which automatically makes him crazy batshit insane like nobody’s business. Thank goodness!
He’s also funny and smart, sweet, generous, considerate and kind.
Because on the phone, his voice changes depending on if he’s talking to someone else, or me to such a degree that anyone on his end of the conversation knows he’s talking to me (anyone else: normal voice. Me: slightly higher-pitched, softer, very gentle).
He calls me “darlin’” and it doesn’t sound weird.
Because he likes Kate Bush and good movies and cried the first time we watched The Elephant Man together, and likes to sit in or near the front of the theater at the movies, and reads while he eats (which means I can also read while I eat), and because he’s highly tolerant and generally supportive of my Happy Rhodes obsession.
I don’t deserve him. I have never deserved him. I love him most of all because he doesn’t realize it and almost certainly never will.
i have a love of my wife’s hip bones. don’t ask me why. she can’t figure it out, either. i just love to touch them when we’re spooning, even if we’re not getting freeky.
my wife is a wonderful cook. i know, i know, typical answer, but she really is a fantastic cook. you should have seen the spread for Thanksgiving, it was amazing to see and taste.
she sometimes gives me this look that sends me over the top. it’s a little playful, a little naughty, a little coy, and a lot seductive. i don’t want to know how she developed that look, but i love it, simply love it.
sigh
I want an SO, so I can talk about my favorite things about him and imagine that he has favorite things about me.
sigh
She’s bright colors, I’m all earth tones.
She’s got a spirit as big as all outside, I’m contained in myself.
She’s got the wings, I’ve got the feet.
…and somehow, she loves me anyway…
He knows my very worst traits, the parts of me which are unkind, mean-spirited and which I hide from everyone else in the world because they’d make people hate me - and he loves me anyway.
He gets genuinely excited by learning new things, and loves, loves to teach them to other people. There’s a light that comes into his eyes when he’s telling you about something he finds fascinating.
And speaking of his eyes - when he smiles now there are lines around them which weren’t there when we first met. I love his eyes and his smile anyway, but those lines - I treasure each and every one of them, because each one is a reminder that of all the people in the world, he has chosen to grow old with *me. *
I’ll get out of bed and not more than 60 seconds will have passed before she’s rolled over into my spot, “Because it’s warm and smells like you (me).”
I’ve been dating a wonderful girl for six months now. The thing I love most about her is her sheer vitality and love for life. Everything she does uplifts. She finds humor in everything, and we can always read each other like an open book. Nice knockers too! She’s the real deal
On the superficial - he has a great ass ;).
On a more serious note - he grounds me. He keeps me sane when I’m the kind of person who could easily fall off the deep end with worry. He keeps me solid.
And I did not expect this, but I fell even more in love with him after our son was born. For someone who has never been around kids in his life, he is AMAZING with him. Sometimes, I see the kid’s face light up when Daddy comes home from work, and I really think my heart’s going to explode with the love I feel for my family, and especially for my husband, who thought he was going to be a terrible father (I can still remember when he told me to turn off “Soliloquy” from Carousel on the Sirius Broadway station two days after I told him I was pregnant because it was making him freak out), and has turned out to be a fantastic dad. When I see my friends whose marriages have fallen apart or turned even more stressful after having a baby, it makes me even more grateful for him because we’ve only grown stronger.
But the great thing about having an imaginary SO is that they can look however you want them to look, behave however you want them to behave, and think however you want them to think.
I’m going to go drink heavily now.
Oh! And there’s never any chance they’ll cheat on you.
This thread is making me cry.
I don’t know whether I will ever have a truly adult, one-on-one emotional relationship outside of the counseling that at long last taught me what it was like.
But this thread is another of the things that give me hope. To want someone to be the best someone they can be. That IS it. Such caring and support are the hope of the world, for without them, and the guts and determination they require, society would be nothing but bloody carnage.
And…
Way to go tdn, Autolycus, Incubus!
I must say, I concur. She’s just so incredibly full of spirit and positive emotional energy. And I danced with that sweetie! You are a lucky guy.
I spent some time with Guitar Mommy’s son yesterday, and finally met the daughter. Such wonderful kids. The son is a typical sullen teen who doesn’t talk much, but when he does, he’s full of wisdom. The daughter can chatter nonsense until the cows come home. She’s so funny.
When Guitar Mommy dropped me off last night, her phone rang. “Hello? No, honey, you’re not interrupting anything! I’m on my way home right now.” She’s such a liar! She was half naked and straddling me on the passenger seat at the time.
Sunspace, I hope that you someday find this kind of happiness. It really comes down to just making a commitment to do so.
Probably the fact that he’s not thrown me out for being a miserable, mean-spirited grumpy old bag. I guess he’s just too lazy to do that, and he likes having someone to make cups of tea for him.
She’s warm. And funny. And cares about the world and everything in it. And she likes Star Wars, Firefly and Doctor Who, not just tolerates it. Plus she lets me think she thinks I’m smarter than she is, even though I’m really not. And she’s sexy as hell. And pretty. And makes good babies.