We’ve just had our first baby, who is now 2 weeks old. What’s the SD on popping a dummy in his mouth? (I think these things are called pacifiers in the US). Is it an entirely normal thing to do? We’ve not given him one yet - I kind of think they look stupid. This is probably a trivial consideration, however, in relation to our current sleepless night situation.
The little’un is breast feeding well, if that makes any difference. Just wondering if there is any reason not to give him a dummy, and if we can expect it to settle the small chap down - He is very restless at night right now.
I have four kids (all bottle-fed) and never used a pacifier. I figured it would be just one more thing to break them from. Besides, when they’re sucking on a pacifier, you can’t see their cute little mouths.
Also, I was told (probably incorrectly) that pacifiers would make their teeth come in crooked. One of the kids sucked on one of her fingers for years. Now that I think about it, maybe a pacifier would have been better. You can’t take a finger away.
There is nothing on this green earth more beautiful than a baby’s mouth. Perfection.
Two kids, no nooks. They never needed them and I was not inclined to introduce them.
Actually, I take that back. In the spirit of fun I ordered a nooky from Carol Wright, or some such type of place, where the outer part looked like a big ol’ pair of red lips, oversized. My son looked hysterical when he would take it, but it broke soon after I bought it (way to go, Quality Control).
This was my thinking, and I tried to get all of my kids started with a binky, but none of them were interested. My oldest sucked her thumb until she was about six months old, but my middle daughter sucked her thumb until she was 8! My youngest never really sucked on her fingers much or anything. But I do think if they need to suck on something to comfort themselves, a binky is better because you can take it away when they get too old!
I instruct women on breastfeeding and I let them ask for a pacifier…some babies like to suck more than others. I think they can save a family’s sanity. I think you can take a pacifier away but thumbs and fingers have a way of making their way back into mouths no matter what you say.
Cyn, OB/GYN RN
Bingo. That was our thinking. Plus, it takes a while for the little one to find his fingers, and some of them really, really need to suck in order to be soothed. They don’t all need pacifiers (obviously), but I think it is almost cruel to deprive the ones who do.
Spencer needed a pacifier. His first night, he was latched on to me for almost five hours. Talk about sore nipples! He turned 2 on April 29, and still gets one for nap time and night time, but that’s it.
Colin took one a little bit in the NICU, but once we got home he didn’t seem to care for it. He’s big on sucking his own fingers now, at four months old. Occasionally, my husband will give him a pacifier, because sometimes that’s the only thing that works for him.
At two weeks, it’s likely that your little one has his days and nights mixed up. Do your best to keep night time interactions quick, dark, and uninteresting. Make daytime the fun time to be awake, and he’ll get it eventually.
My two were breastfed, and were never interested in the binky, though we did try in the first month, just to give me a little break. Since I was a stay-at-home-mom, they could nurse as long as they wanted, so they really didn’t need anything more, I guess. They never sucked their thumbs or fingers either. Of course, they made up for being such good babies later in life…
I discovered it wasn’t about the baby, it was about me.
My son came home at six and a half months (adopted from Korea) with a pacifier. He spit it out, he cried, I put it in, he sucked…five minutes…he spit it out and cried, I put it in, he sucked…five minutes…he spit it out and cried, I put it in, he sucked…five minutes…he spit it out and cried I said “this is stupid” and threw it in a drawer. He quickly adjusted to no paci.
There is an age where they want it, spit it out because they don’t really know better, can’t get it back in for themselves - and then you discover if you are a paci mom.
All three of my boys used them, and all three stopped when they were 4-5 months old, completely on their own. They just lost interest. But when they were tiny, it helped soothe them back to sleep or into their comfort zone.
It is for a bunch, I would imagine. Ours doesn’t seem to care when the sun is up, but I’ve seen 3-month-old kids throw temper tantrums lasting upwards of 6 hours when their parents forgot to bring the pacifier to day care. Stuff that made my jaw drop.
And that too is part of “are you a pacifier parent.” Parents who commit to a pacifier need to make sure to always have it around as long as the child wants it - or until its time to break the habit. If they are lost or damaged, a spare must be handy.
I had trouble remembering to grab enough spare diapers in my sleep deprived state - much less energy for tracking pacifiers, blankies, and teddy bears.
I’m not sure it is all dependent upon the parent, although I know it is in some instances. We had a friend who decided before their child was born that it would never have a pacifier. The kid had an extremely strong urge to suck, and was one of the most miserable babies to be around for the first 6 months of its life. We quit hanging around it after that, so I have no idea how long it took for him to get over that phase.
Mydaughteristhreemonthsoldnow and has had a dummy since she was one week old. I found she was crying for me to nurse her to sleep just because she needed to suck on something. I was worried about getting her a dummy because I’d been told that it could cause “nipple confusion” and lead to her rejecting the breast, but I had no problems with that at all. She doesn’t have the dummy constantly, but I give it to her if she’s having problems settling. Usually, if she’s been in bed crying for a while and then I give it to her, she goes straight off to sleep.
My cousin, a former dental nurse, gave me the nod of approval when she saw Annabel with her dummy. She said she’d seen so many kids who’d ruined their teeth with thumb sucking that she gave her own kids dummies because it’s easier to take away a dummy than a thumb.
She never looks cuter than when I’ve had a good night’s sleep. YMMV.
If I can participate as a mere Auntie . . . my sister says binkies saved her sanity. They worked to sooth her two girls as small infants when nothing else would. She says she figures she quit caring about the binky/no binky debate about her 36th hour with no sleep. And they helped calm her girls and ease them into nap time, bed time, ride time in the car, or any time an incipient fit was in the works.
Do you have to wean the kid off them eventually? Sure, but I don’t think it’s that hard. It’s not like kids show up at kindergarten with a binky.
She moved her two-year-old from “binky anytime” to “binky at bedtime” and then to “no binky.” The only problem she says she had was that the 2 y.o. would walk up to other babies in the store or mall and loudly inform them “BINKIES ARE FOR BEDTIME!”
Mom of two, former newborn nanny, current babysitter to two under two: some need 'em, some don’t. I’ve also seen plenty of kids spit out the paci in order to put the fingers in, so I don’t think you’ll necessarily convert a thumbsucker into a paci sucker! But it’s worth a try, for sure.