Oh either are okay. Though jokes that are in fact truth are preferred to the just silly?
The point of the exercise as my wife shared it is to have us evaluate how we are living. And of course it can be serious and goofy both.
So for you, @Moriarty, and @GuanoLad , you content with the current state of your relationships?
Some of the joke ones really seem to focus around that it would be nice to be living a life that will have us remembered by “They knew how to have and be fun!”
Honestly since I suspect it will mostly kids and hopefully by then grandkids memorializing me, I think that’s at least as good of a goal to have what they’d say as the first thoughts I had - that I was a person they could depend on, or my desire to be the best me I could be? Probably as important a guide moving forward? Neither eclipsing the other but maybe I should prioritize the fun part a bit more than I do.
Wouldn’t be the first funeral with people hired to do just that!
There are some of us who would just stop posting with no notice ever given to the community here about our demise. Have you instructed your GF to notify us if something were to happen to you?
Alternatively, you could start a thread asking us to memorialize you while you’re still here to read it. I’m pretty sure my entry would begin, “That SOB…”
I really don’t care what happens at my funeral since I won’t be there, but I suppose I’d like at least one person to acknowledge that fact. I do care what people think of me while I am still alive though, so here is a list of those:
His sudden disappearance was addressed in the “Who are you missing” thread. I too worried for his welfare there.
Short version, at least as of a year ago is that somebody who knew him IRL & had his Facebook moniker checked and he was alive and well and living large just as he always has.
He just decided for whatever reason to totally bail out of the 'Dope.
The serious side of the exercise, as my wife explained it to me, is then to ask what you plan on doing to change your life. Cause we ain’t dead yet.
Interesting about friends. My wife and I both recognize that we focused our lives around our kids and our careers for a very long time and that neither of us have too many close friends outside of those contexts. We are not huge socializers. She is bothered by that. I am honestly perfectly fine with it. I am not sure if that is gender conditioning or just who were are though.
When I die, I don’t want a traditional eulogy. I want something modeled after the Speaker for the Dead concept from the Ender’s Game series. A Speaker tells the truth of a person’s life — the good, the bad, the complicated — in a way that helps people understand who that person really was. That’s what I want: honesty, context, and clarity.
After that, I want a party. Not mourning for its own sake, but a celebration of the life I lived and the people I cared about. The Speaking is for understanding; the party is for remembering.
I read of that before but I was suspicious because how would the dead person be there to hold the mystery woman accountable, “Hey, you took my money and didn’t show up to my funeral?”
However, I would guess the woman would still do so because of the threat-risk that the soon-to-die person may have told someone else she’d show up, so she better not be a no-show.
What I would like to be said about me would be that I was unique, quirky, odd, and often helped people out, such as gifting money to a Korean friend to help her pay her college tuition, or getting groceries, clothes and a place to stay for several homeless people. I’d hope a lot of such recipients would be there to show up or at least say something upon my death.
More realistically, I’ve been a church pianist for many churches for 20+ years, so I’d guess a lot of people would just say things like, “Well, he played piano for us…”
I don’t want a funeral. Since I cleverly arranged not to have any family, there won’t be anyone to arrange one. I know what people will say about me, that she was reliable. For about two weeks until I’m completely forgotten. Which is fine with me.
I agree. I don’t want a funeral - I don’t like going to other peoples, and I’m not going to be there (well, yes in body, but not in mind). I always thought the idea of demanding things to be done for your own funeral was rather selfish. If ther rest of the family want to do something, that’s fine - it’s their party, they can do what they want (even if it’s ‘Thank christ the silly old bugger’s dead’) - but I’ve told them, if they ever spend so much time and money that they are inconvenienced by the funeral arrangements, I will personally come back and haunt them.
I had a dream about my own funeral. A speaker said about me “Typo told me a lie once.” (paused for emphasis.) “He said he did not believe in unconditional love. That’s not true. If you were in his family, if you were his friend, he’d do anything - anything - for you.”
I don’t have any relationships. What friends I once had have drifted away, and I’ve always been alone romantically. I like it this way, I don’t feel lonely, just alone, an important difference. But it will make my funeral rather sparse, I guess. Could be a bit of an Eleanor Rigby situation for me.
