This isn’t going to be a complete answer, but ‘used’ can be looked at a few ways.
- water is treated
- water is treated
- water runs downhill
- water is regulated
Theoretically speaking, most water is neither created nor destroyed, but cycles in one of the great cycles of life. There is only so much fresh water in the cycle, however, and the fresh water that people use usually comes from a lake, river, or well. These are replenished by rainwater and upstream runoff. There is only so much of it and most of it has to be treated before being put to use. That’s the first treatment.
The second treatment was only added in recent historical times and comes after you’ve used it and before it’s released back into the wild. I haven’t been keeping up and no longer know how many times Mississippi River water is ‘used’ before it reaches the ocean. And if the second treatment (and the time it spends in the river can add ‘treatment’) is insufficient, the first treatment for folks further down the line becomes more extensive and expensive.
Since water runs downhill, only the water coming toward you, and that you have the physical equipment to gather, is of use to you. If the water has been pulled out for irrigation, a lot of it will re-enter the water cycle as the moisture in crops, increased evaporation, and groundwater. This will not be water still available for use downstream. As an aside, some irrigation runoff water is rich in selenium, salt, and plain old silt and not only difficult to treat, but toxic if left untreated.
In some areas, water is regulated, so that you are only allowed to remove and use the amount of water that you have been given rights to. It doesn’t matter if it’s there, or if you have the equipment to pull it out, if you don’t have the rights.
The problem with aquifers has been addressed in other posts. I’d add that some of the water refreshing the aquifers is pulling minerals and fertilizers along with it. The replenished water may not be as clean as the older water.
So I guess the short answer is that water is never completely ‘lost’, but we don’t drink salt water and we have water systems that are set up to deliver a certain volume of water at a certain level of treatment. If the demand increases or the water quality declines because it has been put to increased use before it reaches the system, then you’re looking at an investment of millions to expand the system. And if everyone grabs for the same water at the same time, there might not be enough for everyone.