Let me start by saying that i’ve never had a particular problem with the idea of being able to watch people have sex on video, the internet or whatever. Although i can’t say that much of what is available is all that exciting.
I’m also opposed to attempts to censor this stuff, although i do support efforts to keep it from minors. Some people on this thread have asserted that porn probably does little or no harm to children. I agree that this could well be true, but it seems to me that those who advocate restricting the availability of porn to children do so largely out of a concern to prevent children’s unauthorized and/or unsupervised access to pornography.
This is certainly my position. I support any effort to keep porn out of the hands of children acting by themselves. But if you, as a parent, believe that your children should have access to porn, and you want to buy them porn videos or set up an internet porn account for them, then go ahead. They may end up with a fairly slanted sense of what constitutes “typical” sex, however.
Now, before anyone starts railing at me and saying that there is no such thing as “typical” sex, i will say that i agree. In fact, the problem with much porn, IMHO, is that to a considerable extent it portrays a very narrow and limited version of what sex is. What i’m talking about here is the more standard devices that seem to be vastly over-represented in modern pornography. Some examples include (WARNING - sexually explicit content ahead):
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The women’s bodies, especially the size of their (obviously enhanced) breasts, which are often out of all proportion to their body shape. Curiously, the obsession with enhanced breasts appears to be much more prevalent in American than European porn.
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The frequency with which the women have shaved genital areas. Some people ascribe this to a male desire for women to be very young, with a shaved pussy substituting for the fact that the actors are required by law to be over 18. I’m not sure i totally subscribe to this hypothesis, but it doesn’t seem beyond the realms of possibility.
(By the way, does anyone else find the word “pussy” vaguely weird? I moved to the US last year, and it seems to be a fairly American term)
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The size of the men’s penises. Cecil has done a couple of columns on penis size, and i’m sure i don’t need to cite a mountain of statistics to get you all to agree that the dicks on male porn stars exceed the average by a good couple of inches.
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More important, perhaps, than these physical attributes is the way in which sex is initiated and carried out. I don’t believe that all porn watchers expect their everyday sex lives to be the same as what they see on screen, but any man who does must surely expect just about every woman he meets to immediately unzip his fly and start giving him a head job.
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I may be revealing a bit too much about myself here, but i have not slept with too many women who, at the instant of penetration, are immediately screaming and thrashing around in the throes of wild orgasm. It is, of course, possible that i’m just useless in bed, but in my experience the female orgasm manifests itself differently in each woman, and there are many women who take time to build up to the level of excitement that the average porn actress seems to muster at the mere sight of a hard dick.
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Again, my experience may not be typical, but for what it’s worth i have not encountered too many women whose greatest wish is to have me withdraw at the moment of orgasm and ejaculate all over their face. Yet this is the way that about 90% (probably more) or porn encounters end.
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And nor have the majority of my sexual partners begged: “fuck me in the ass”. A desire for anal sex is another aspect of women’s sexuality that seems over-represented in pornography.
Let me say clearly and unequivocally that i am not passing judgment on women or men who do enjoy anal sex, facial cumshots etc. I firmly believe that any sex act between consenting adults is absolutely fine. I just wanted to point out that much modern pornography seems to conform to a narrative stereotype that vastly under-represents the true diversity of sexual practices.
Some on this thread have pointed to the fact that many women in pornography look less than happy to be there. I’m sure that this is often the case. There have, i believe, been studies conducted showing that quite a lot of porn actresses were abused as children, and that some of them are still abused, drugged etc. by the porn film-makers. But i believe that if this is the case, the way to deal with this should be to target the abusers, rather than simply to decide that all portrayals of sex should be banned.
I may be wrong, but it seems to me that pornographers might actually expand their potential adult market if they branched out a bit and portrayed a wider variety of sexual practices that more people could relate to their own sexual experiences. The success of some “new age” and self-identifying feminist purveyors of erotica show that there is a market out there. But i suppose that the multi-billion dollar success of the mainstream porn industry also shows that sticking to a cliched formula can make you plenty of money.