This Homestarrunner cartoon–when the Poopsmith holds up his sign at the fight–it reads “I’m #2!”
This site always makes me laugh - the little orange xylophone kitty with the beady eyes just kills me!
This just happened on my way to work. I get up to a red light, there is a an ancient pick up sitting in the intersection with two people under it. They are trying to attach a chain to the underside of the truck which is connected to another vehicle, a slightly newer jeep. They get it reattached and start to pull out into the intersection. Turns out not only do they have a jeep chained to the first truck, but they have a boat chained to the jeep. And as soon as they got a few car lengths further into the intersection, the chain connecting the boat to the jeep came off.
It was funny.
I think the hardest I ever laughed for a movie was the scene in Office Space where Ron Livingston and his two friends go to Chatchkees for some coffee. Ron goes: “Boy I tell ya. Some days. One of these days it’s just going to be…” And he fake pulls out a gun, loads it and starts shooting it. Then the waiter walks by and goes: “Jigcka jigcka jigcka.” I nearly died.
Another thing, a running joke with my friends is if we’re driving around, and one of us has to go to the bathroom, we go to Barnes and Nobles. Well, we go there, and me and my friend both take a piss at the same time. We’re telling jokes and laughing and stuff when this huge guy walks in. The guy goes to a stall while my friend finishes up and leaves. Meanwhile, I’m still chuckling and going strong. Then the guy in the stall starts farting, and I think this is the funniest thing ever. I’m trying to refrain from laughing but eventually I can’t hold it in any longer, and I burst out. But I’m not done peeing yet so I’m trying to finish peeing before the guy in the stall comes out and kills me. I barely finish when I hear the toilet flush, and I run out without washing my hands. All in all, it was pretty funny.
I’ve got plenty more anecdotal stories but they probably won’t be funny to anyone but me.
If any of your remember the Onion a while back with the “Point/Counter-point,” this one will be funny. My friend and I were in History, and our teacher was answering one of the very open ended questions he often got regarding the war. Out of the blue, I hand my friend a note that said “No, it won’t.”
No one couldn understand what we were trying not to laugh at.
If any of your remember the Onion a while back with the “Point/Counter-point,” this one will be funny. My friend and I were in History, and our teacher was answering one of the very open ended questions he often got regarding the war. Out of the blue, I hand my friend a note that said “No, it won’t.”
No one couldn understand what we were trying not to laugh at.
Back in the mid 80’s, I visited a friend who was working in a small department store stocking shelves. We were in the arts and crafts department, when an elderly lady came up and asked in all seriousness, ‘Do you have styrofoam balls?’ I managed to make it around the next corner before I busted out laughing uncontrollably, and my poor friend just busted out laughing in front of the lady. To this day, I still get a chuckle out of the incident. 
Waaay back when I was in high school (and still went to church), my friend and I were sitting in church being the very models of Southern Baptist decorum. That is, until the preacher quoted a Bible Verse about Lazarus --“He stinketh.”
For some reason, this struck both of us as hilarious and we started to laugh (that silent, shaking-all-over laughter). As we laughed, the pew we were sitting on began to shake. The harder we laughed, the harder it shook until it was banging against the floor.
At this point, people were turning around and staring at us–and this was in a pretty big church–at least 400 people in the congregation.
The preacher stopped talking, gave us this “go to hell” look, which was pretty ironic coming from a preacher, called us by name and asked us if we’d like to share what was so funny. We couldn’t stop laughing even though we were throughly embarassed. He then said, quite seriously, that he would stop talking so we could regain our self-control. The whole church got completely silent as the entire congregation waited for us to stop laughing.
I was completely mortified but still unable to control my laughter. We ended up having to leave the building and stand outside.
My parents were not happy with me that day…but it’s still funny.
My Story
Back when I was at university I shared one of those old victorian homes with a handful of interesting characters, by far the Nabob of the place was D, a philosophy major, with a huge brain and even bigger thirst for alcohol and herb.
Many were the nights spent inbibing one thing or the other and having deep angst filled discussions which, as the evening waned turned into rollicking debates and not unusally ended with fits of uncontrollable laughter.
In the wee small hours of just such an evening, D announced he had a radical new theory to propose, would we please arouse the unconscious among our midst.
It was simple enough and seemed innocent. The theory was that you could end bouts of uncontrollable laughter by waiting till the next natural pause and finished your laughter with the syllable, ‘yum’. Yes, that would finish it off apparently. Swore he’d been testing this theory and found it very helpful.
Of course, this presentation was met with the predictable bouts of uproarious laughter. Thought we’d all split a gut. And then, just when it looked like it might stop didn’t we hear D insert a little ‘yum’. We were undone all over again. And again when it seemed it might end, a tiny barely audable, ‘yum’. We were begging for mercy, when D insisted, ‘stop laughing I swear it works!’
For months afterward, unsuspecting bouts of laughter would be punctuated with the ending ‘yum’, it got so we’d all have to leave the room to avoid laughing till we cried.
It still makes me laugh just thinking about it.
What a fun thread. 
Monty Python- Life of Brian:
A palace guard has laughed at the stupid name of Pontius Pilate’s friend. “The next person who laughs will be executed!” Pilate rattles off some more stupid names, glaring death at each guard in turn. They are sucking in their cheeks, biting thier lips, looking like they’re about to cry… trying not to laugh. “Do you find something… rrrrrisible?”
Oh, that scene almost makes me throw up it’s so funny.
MST3k: One of the “Shorts” about women’s college?
There’s a scene in the film where a girl has just had her boyfriend propose to her that day. She tells her girlfriends about it, and the narrator says, “Now she’s going to have a five-pound party!” Except he has a little Boston accent, and it sounds like “pahty”. Joel says, “Five pound potty? She must have had a BIG breakfast!”
A lot of times I have to pause MST3k because of cracks like that. I do have a question though, I don’t know what a “5 pound party” is… has anyone heard that phrase? Or did the narrator really say something else?
-k
Any Herbert Kornfeld article from The Onion.
Oh, man, one thing that slayed me was during the “Trumpy” episode of MST3K. One of the guys breaks open this alien egg thing and this red goo pours out of it. Joel does a perfect little old man voice and says, “Schhmucker’s Raspberry Preserves.” I was on the floor choking. And he does it three or four times in the movie! Nearly killed me.
Dr. Evil is astoundingly hilarious. And the scene in Goldmember where Austin and Mini-me are fighting. And the scene shortly thereafter where he winds up poking Fred Savage’s mole with a stick.
Mr. Bean. Especially the one where he’s driving home, sitting in a chair, on the roof of his car. Or towards the end of the skit, where things are getting more and more insane.
Jerkcity has made and still makes me laugh until I hurt.
The Rugrats episode where they went on vacation to Las Vegas. They had these magicians who were a parody of Sigfried and Roy called “Heimlich und Bob”. “And now we pat on it with our special Heimlich und Bob hands…” (well, OK, I thought it was funny)
Also about ten years ago I was on a bus and there was a teenager wearing Big Pants. When he left this elderly lady followed him off yelling “Yoo-hoo, yoo-hoo, your pants are falling off!” The entire bus cracked up.
Repairman is working on a very large printer. After much effort, the offending motor is free. He leans into the machine and pulls out the football size part and, holding it up, declares, “It’s a boy!”
At the moment a bearing falls off the motor and rolls across the floor. He says, “No! It’s a girl”
If you didn’t read anal scurvy’s I Don’t Know How To Put Things In My Ass OP in MPSIMS not long ago, you should do it. Um, it is very much the way it sounds. Damn, it’s funny.
I thought of this thread just last night. I forgot to say “Space Ghost Coast to Coast can nearly kill me.” We were watching it and he was talking to a reggae singer. After the reggae singer said, “Oh, I was playing some shows down in South America,” Space Ghost leaps in with “I love South America! Home to all those great Delta Bluesmen!” and then starts singing Sweet Home Alabama.
The whole of the Power Puff Girls, Boogie Man episode completely cracked me up. The attack on the Disco ball is a fantastic parody.
This
http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/blackadder/epguide/two_chains.shtml
The argument between Blackadder & the Spanish Torturer is …ROTFLMAO!