What have you gotten away with?

This past Wednesday, I was taking a tour of the Capitol in DC. One of the things our tour guide mentioned was that there was an underground subway between buildings within the Capitol that used to be open to the public, but that the public was no longer allowed to ride.

The next day, I went back to the Capitol to observe the House and Senate in session. In between gallery viewings, I wandered down an unobstructed hallway out of curiousity, figuring that I’d be stopped rather quickly if I wasn’t supposed to be there. I pass plenty of people who pay no attention to me. I pass the Senate barber shop, snack store and other odd locations. And then I find myself at the entrance to the subway. So…I ride the subway. And when I get to the OTHER side, walking out, I see a security guard and a large sign saying that only staff members with ID are allowed.


At any rate, what stories do the rest of you have about getting away with something, whether tame like mine, or not-so-tame (as you Dopers are wont to be)?

I took the “Do Not Remove Under Penalty Of Law” tags off my pillows.

Sometimes when I’m watching Jeopardy at home and playing along, I don’t always respond in the form of a question.

I’m a sock of the grapist, and haven’t been banned

(no, not really)

(really, I’m not a sock of the grapist, it’s a joke)

A few years after graduation, my old roomate and I met on campus at our Alma Mater, the University of Wisconsin. Walking through campus, we found ourselves surrounded by accounting graduates, who were at a continuing ed thing for the weekend. They were talking about a party that night that the department was sponsoring.

On a lark, and while quite inebriated, we made our own nametags and bluffed our way past the registration desk into the party. The open bar made things even worse, and soon we were telling completely made up stories of our campus days to huge laughter from the people at our table. Many people even said they remembered the events that we made up. A couple of guys said they were in attendance at our fake events.

The grads were almost all men, and we danced with their wives and just had a great time. Eventually we became too drunk and had trouble keeping our stories straight and we got scared and ran away. What a fun night.

My buddy lives in Australia now and we see each other once every four or five years. It is always the first thing we talk about.

Short version of a very long story:

Time-late seventies.

After a court appearance for a minor violation a buddy and I informed the judge that we didn’t have the cash to pay the fine on the spot. We were escorted immediately to jail. We were standing at the table where you empty your pockets and they put your stuff in an envelope. My buddy hands over his wallet and instead of putting it in the envelope, the cop starts looking through it. This reminded me that I had a very seriously illegal substance wrapped in aluminum foil in my wallet. Somehow, in a very busy jail intake area, with cops everywhere and surrounded my two-way mirrored glass I managed to, in one smooth motion take my wallet out of my pocket, remove the foil packet, hand the wallet to the officer and stick the packet on a small lip on the underside of the metal table thing we were standing at.

When it comes to getting away with stuff, that may have been my finest moment.

I plea bargained a potentially costly (28 point) traffic violation down to a “failure to signal” (2 points) one time.
I guess that’s not really “getting away with something”

I did not get caught shop-lifting a plastic Care Bear in 1981, hoping to impress a girl.
Jeez I’m pathetic. A freakin’ Care Bear marked the very apex of my criminal career.

There have been a number of small coups related to drugs and/or taking drugs, but nothing that interesting. Just a lot of creative ways my friends and I (back in high school) found to smoke drugs during the school day and almost get caught and wiggle our way out of it.

Oh yeah, and there was the time in my senior year when I backed into my teacher’s car while trying to ditch during lunch with a freshman girl who had the hots for me. I offered to pay for the damage and everything, but he neither accepted money (granted, it was probably just paint scratches) nor got me in any kind of trouble. I had my first bag of cocaine on me, too, and she had had a little ‘gummer’ (where you stick your finger in, not all the way in, and pick up a tiny little bit of ambient dust from the bag and rub it on your gums and they feel a little numb). Ditching + taking freshman girl with you + hard drugs + running into teacher’s car. Looking back, it could’ve been a HELL of a lot worse than it was.

I put a dollar in a change machine and the dollar kicked back out, but I also got my quarters. So I put the dollar in again, and again the dollar kicked back out and I also got the quarters. I did this several times, until the dollar jammed in the machine. I then went to the service counter and reported that I had lost a dollar in the machine. I have felt both guilty and triumphant ever since.

I was driving a motorcycle at night with only a permit - a no-no in Pennsylvania. I was in a town that I was familiar with, but didn’t know well and went down the wrong way on a one way street. A cop was sitting at the end of the road. Just as he started asking me for my ID, a kid ran up and said that there was a gang of kids attacking his friend. The cop handed me back my ID and drove off.

A couple of minor things come to mind. Many years ago when money was very tight, I stopped to buy a few dollars worth of gas. The station was the type you had to pay first. I paid and started pumping and expected the pump to kick off when I reached the $2 I paid. The pump flew by $2 and kept going. At about $10, I figured I better stop. I hung up the pump and as I was getting in my car, a guy at a neighboring pump started complaining about his pump stopping at $2. I quickly left the station and avoided it for a few months.

A few years after the above, I was working a job in Olympia that I found through a labor union. The jobsite was a large apartment complex. At the end of the day, a guy I barely knew asked me if I could give him a ride home, he lived only a few miles away but had a large toolbox plus a toolbelt full of tools. When we got to the aparment where the guy lived, he jumped out and said he would be back in a few minutes for his tools. He disappeared around a corner. 15 minutes later I went looking for him and when I couldn’t find him, I decided to go home and I would give him his tools the next day. As it turned out, I had a job offer from someone else waiting for me when I got home and I never returned to the job in Olympia. I felt guilty for a while for keeping the guys tools but he never came back to get them. I still have some of those tools in my toolbox.

Parking downtown in a business only parking lot and leaving before the tow truck gets there.

I was smoking in the john in Jr. High and a teacher walked in. We snuffed the butts, but she knew we were smoking and wanted to confiscate our smokes from us.

Not wanting to get busted at such a tender age, I tucked my smokes under the cardboard bottom of my purse (it was there to help keep the shape of the purse.

When asked to dump the contents of said purse, the smokes stayed hidden under the cardboard and I walked. Beauty.

I once landed in a plane with my tray table down, my seat reclined and my seatbelt unfastened. Woo-hoo!

OK, somebody has to ask, and I’ve decided it’s going to be ME.

What does one do to get 28 points at once? Of course, the only reason I want to know is that if I plan on doing the same thing, I think I will change my plan :slight_smile:

I don’t remember the biggest “gotten away with” story but a couple of days ago I’d left my driver’s license in my running fanny pack (to get in the gym… yes, I ran to the gym). The next day I went to cash a lottery ticket. To my complete surprise the clerk asked for my ID. I was so dumbfounded, I blurted out “I’m 25!” and he gave me a very very dirty look but grudgingly cashed them. Sure made me feel good though!

Hit and run - 12 points
Leaving the scene of an accident - 12 points
Careless driving - 4 points

I was rather surprised to discover that hit-and-run and leaving-the-scene are two different offenses.
(No one was hurt - even at 16 I wouldn’t have done that. A parked car in a residential neighborhood that I sideswiped)

I never recycle and for the past 8 years I’m the only house on the block with no green recycle bin sitting out at the curb on whatever day it is that I’m supposed to recycle.

I sneak into the county pool without paying whenever I can. It’s a form of personal retribution to me for having to take care of their grass that’s adjacent to my property.

If I’m at a home center looking for a tiny washer or something and cannot find it where it should be and I cannot find someone to help me then I regard that as permission to go ahead and strip the said part from the display and take it home where it can be of some use to someone.

At concerts where my seats are bad I sneak my way up to a better location.

When I was a teenager I snuck into and out of a mental hospital just for fun.

You probably just whooshed me but…you’re allowed to take those off if you are the consumer. It’s illegal for the retailer to remove them. Doesn’t anybody ever read those things?

Hundreds of occasions of drunk driving, and I got pulled over and breathalyzed once and was let go because I was so close to home. Stupid and dangerous, but I did get away with it. (I don’t do it anymore, fyi)

There are more, but I don’t want to incriminate myself. :smiley: