What I said/What I should have said

The rules of the game should be obvious from the examples. You post a time where you accidentally put your foot in it, and what you should have said instead.

Said: I can’t then; I have a PAP scheduled, and I already cancelled one, and I just can’t cancel another-- can we schedule it for another time?
WISHS: That time is not good for me. Do you have another time?
Said: Ma Shlomech?
WISHS: Ma Shlomcha? *

*Trying to be cool and speak Hebrew to people perfectly capable of speaking English, I got the masculine and feminine confused.
Said: Oh, boys do that stuff all the time. Don’t they?
WISHS: I will impress upon him that this is unacceptable behavior, and must not be repeated, or he will be severely punished.
Said: People are going to except us to donate money again aren’t they?
WISHS: Oh, what a terrible tragedy!
Said: It’s always good to adopt shelter dogs.
WISHS: I can tell that’s a purebred Welsh Springer Spaniel.
Asked: At what point in your labor do you want pain relief, on a scale of one to ten, with ten being the worst pain you can bear?
Said: Probably 4 1/2, maybe 5.
WISHS: 0.

I’ll probably think of more later. Right now, I’ve stuck to stuff that really happened, but feel free to steal stories for friends, relatives, enemies, and soforth,

WISHS: Maybe he was late leaving the office, or he could just be delayed in traffic.
Said: Maybe he’s dead.

WISHS: You don’t have to sign the petition if you don’t want to.
Said: It’s just a signature. It’s not like we’re asking for your first born son (THEN I remember the person I was speaking to had a first born son who was the victim of a murder/suicide by his father)