I know what you’re saying. That pisses me off immensely. But in the 18 years that Janet has been performing on stage, I have NEVER seen her sing live. She’s too busy dancing. Boobney Spears does the same thing most of the time, although I have heard her sing live a couple of times.
Music isn’t music anymore, it’s product.
OK, my halftime show? The Tragically Hip. Enough said. Lock this thread. 
Ignore the “But”. It doesn’t make sense in that context.
I’d pick one act, someone like the Rolling Stones, the Who, or Bruce Springsteen – people used to performing in stadiums. Give them 15 minutes. No frills, no dancing girls.
Just get a marching band.
Then show game analysis during half-time. It’s a football game, not a concert.
(disclaimer) I stopped watching the game about 10 years ago.
Have the winner of the Drum Corps International Summer Games play. This year, it would have been the Blue Devils.
These drum corps are experts at field spanning, visually stunning, musically proficcient shows, much more than the average college or high school marching band.
Cirque de Soliel was my first choice, but I certainly would not turn down the Rolling Stones.
Just want to point out that when U2 performed a couple years ago, they did not lyp-synch.
Huge Zamboni like-lawn mowers and a team of highway line painters to trim up the field at halftime. Who doesn’t like the Zamboni races between periods at a hockey game? There would be 16 of each, and each NFL team mascot would be behind the wheel. AFC mascots on the Zambonis, NFC mascots in the line painters. If it’s a success, and I can’t imagine that it wouldn’t be, the next year, the mascots switch rides.
And maybe, I can offer Giraffe $1M to eat another sandwich.
I’d revive Up With People.
Hey, if it weren’t lame, it wouldn’t be the Superbowl halftime show. You don’t want to mess with tradition.
Hmmm . . . I think the Brian Seltzer Orchestra with Tony Bennett would make a great halftime show
Of course, the torture and execution of Carrot Top would be the special feature
You don’t EVEN want to know what I’d do to the halftime show… heh heh.
Ok, I’m going to tell ya anyway.
I’d throw a Fetish/S&M show with whips, electricity, and music! Semi-nude fetishists dancing and whipping the football players who happen to be hanging from racks. Goth/techno bands would play while people hung from hooks through their skin and then a fetish fashion show/S&M opera would commence! Girls getting tongues and nipples pierced, guys being dominated by vampy dominatrices… think fetish cirque du soleil. Oh, YEAH!
The Super Bowl halftime show should consist of nothing. Just let the people at the game get up and go to the bathroom and talk to their friends.
On TV, they can show highlights of the first half.
Halftime shows are an abomination against nature. I like covering really small high school football games. Why? The halftime “show” consists mainly of a group of cheerleaders doing a dance routine that lasts about 2 minutes.
That’s good enough for me.
I went to the World Cup Final in 1994 in Pasadena. There was hoopla before the game, but halftime consisted of mostly nothing. And it was bliss.
StrongBad has a halftime show?
Oh. What?
The losers of the league championship games play a consolation game during halftime. No stopping of the clock for any reason whatsoever.
Start with a drum & bugle corps for five minutes. (Either the last summer’s winner or a paid all-star group.)
Cirque de Soleil (or similar type of troupe) doing astounding visual and athletic presentations for five minutes. (With larger than life sets similar to the Olympics opening ceremonies.)
And for the last five minutes, bring back the D&BC with the acrobatic dancers and throw in old timers and contemporary singers who can actually sing well and sing live with the D&BC (e.g., the current boy band and Tony Bennett; or Clay Aiken and the Four Tops) and have them do a knock your socks off Americana medley. (None of this singing of the artist’s pop hits of three years ago crap.)
And, like the Olympics opening ceremonies (the better model to follow rather than the grammy or MTV award shows), have audience participation props.
Possible songs, themes, and crowd pleasers: Soul Train; Copland’s Rodeo and a cowboy theme; parades and floats; surfin’; college fight songs; jazz. (And please, no songs about songs – I hate that.)
This may not be ‘edgy’ or ‘commercial’ but it certainly beats hearing Janet singing about checking out a guy’s package or Nelly grabbing his or Diddy telling us how much better he is than the rest of us or Kid Rock sticking his head through a torn American flag or hearing pop songs that were popular for a few months a few years ago and that have nothing to do with anything else going on.
Although, my ideas still don’t beat bare breasts.
Peace.
All hail moriah!
Then Marcel Marceau is yer only man 
Lingerie Football. Oh, wait. . .
They should stage the fight (discussed over on IMHO) between Samoan Rugby players (with their socks) and a fully tooled-up Navy Seals squad.
It might not last fifteen minutes, depending on who you ask.
Bring back the Kilgore Rangerettes!!!
Or have The Stanford Marching Band perform. Then get back to the game.