What important life lessons have you learned recently?

[pbbth]

When having a sexual relationship with a man who is well endowed one MUST be very careful to avoid urinary tract infections. Pee directly after sex and drink plenty of cranberry juice or you will pay for it later.

[Faruiza]

@olivesmarch4th

I learned that no matter how you react to it, shit’s going to happen, so you might as well react peacefully and with gratitude.

This seems like a good time to tell you that I think you are THE Cat’s Ass TM. Just needed to throw that in right this second.

Originally posted by Argent Towers
If you’re in the process of packing up all of your stuff in preparation for a move, and go to your dad’s house to pick up some plastic tubs, and your sister is there with her friend, do not accept their offer to smoke a bowl of extremely powerful psychoactive herbs, and then go to Nick’s English Hut and order an elk burger and French fries and drink beer at the bar while you’re waiting for it, and then consume the elk burger and French fries in about eighty seconds, giving yourself a terrible stomach-ache.

Wrong, amigo. The lesson here is to learn to moderate the munchies so that one can fully enjoy the powerful herbs in question. It’s easier. Glad to help. My work here is done.

[Naturally_Oblivious]

I’ve learned that most everything modern US citizens do with corpses is a waste of money.

Donate the corpse to the local medical school, spend $100 on refreshments, and have a small gathering at someone’s house. Everyone will be a lot more comfortable, and you’ll still get the closure you need.

[Count_Blucher]

I’ve learned that there is no ethics test to become a next-door neighbor.

Just a mortgage app.

[Stauderhorse]

Do not feed stray, flea-bitten cats and then act surprised when there are fleas on you later.