Apparently, you can’t convert to Zoroastrianism; you have to be born into the religion. 
Or just buy a Mazda.
I hate those shitty entitled smokers who feel they have the right to flick their shit out open car windows, especially when the town we are in is bone dry and at a high risk of fire.
Nope. Don’t get this.
slow drivers during rush hour traffic. Slow drivers in non-rush hour traffic. Slow drivers sleeping peacefully in their bed at night. Deceased slow drivers who’ve been dead for hundreds of years.
If the rest of traffic is going 70 then we should have the right, nay the duty, to ram anyone driving 50 off the road.
If the light turns green and there is a line of people behind you then accelerate fast enough so people can get through the light. It’s not that hard.
Users, like every programmer the world over.
Ahura Mazda is Zoroaster’s supreme god. God of light, truth, and goodness. Creator of all that is.
Ever since I first saw a Mazda car, way back whenever, I wondered about the brand name choice.
Mazda was also a brand name for incandescent light bulbs. From the wiki “Mazda brand light bulbs were made for decades after 1945 outside the USA. The company chose the name due to its association with Ahura Mazda, the transcendental and universal God ofZoroastrianism whose name means light of wisdom (Ahura = light, Mazda = wisdom) in the Avestan language.”
Fucking Humans. You fucking semi-evolved half-apes who are shitting on this planet and ruining it for every other species.
You’re not fucking special beings created to own the planet. You’re animals, like all other animals, but with thumbs, self-importance and greater communications skills.
Yeah, them. Great post.
People who complain when other people make innocent “insincere” comments. You know what they mean, so accept it like that instead of taking offence.
For example:
“How are you?” Yeah, they don’t really want to know everything that’s wrong with you. Its a greeting. Say “fine, how are you?” and move on.
“Guess what?” of course you don’t have to guess, it’s an expression to get your attention before sharing news.
“Did you get a haircut?” Sure, it should be obvious, but they’re just trying to acknowledge your change in appearance. It’s usually a compliment or prelude to one. Most people would be upset if no one noticed.
And many other common sayings that people complain are stupid. Take it how you know it’s intended and move on.
This one bugs me too. Why, when one gets a haircut, must every living speech-enabled soul I encounter comment on it?
Here is a true conversation I once had at a high-tech Silicon Valley company.
The scene: Several programmers chatting in the hallway. I join them.
Programmer 1: You got a new haircut!
Me: No, it’s the same old haircut I always get.
Programmer 2: It’s a new instance of an old haircut.
Me: There you go!
Suck-it-uppers, sack-uppers, nut-uppers, cowboy-uppers. I have been called pussy just often enough by such people that I assume they always mean me, and that I therefore owe, them, the world, and myself a vast debt of misery I have no intention of ever paying off.
It’s actually a pun! The founder of the company had the last name Matsuda, but he also thought Zoroastrianism was kinda of cool, so he decided to name the company “Mazda” as both a reference to the faith and his own name.
Phew! Glad you didn’t say dirty hippies!
Picky eaters. If the list of foods you avoid consists of things that don’t cause you to break out in hives or cause you brutal acid reflux, it’s a sign of deeper issues.
Evangelicals who respond to non-religious people rejecting their evangelism with any variation on, “But I’m not talking about religion! I’m talking about a personal relationship with God!”
Webster’s, y’all. Check into it sometime.
Thank you.
People who take food & drink from the fridge then place it back in a different, illogical place. They take the mayonnaise from the side door and place it back on the drinks shelf or take salad from the vegetables tray and put it back somewhere else. Also related is people who can’t be bothered to see anything in the fridge behind the front row, so they buy more of it at the grocery store so it’s up to you to make sure things don’t go to spoil and you wind up with four partially used ketchup bottles and so on.
People who have no inside voice for their daily routine, saying what a busy day they have ahead of them each and every day, stating each and every thing they have to do throughout the day, multiple times a day, changing their mind multiple times so you never can tell if they’re really going to do it, then telling you how you can help them out to accomplish their daily goals like the whole world revolves around them.
So go ahead and file for divorce. it sounds like you’re ready. 