It used to happen to me all the time. I mean ALL the time. It was horrid.
I have really rather enjoyed life more since I gained weight. Yeah, that bad.
I intend to employ a taser on anyone who does it to Celtling. (Or whatever more painful device may have been invented by then.)
Well, naturally. But the point I was responding to was SFG’s claim that blowjobs without recompense are some sort of cultural expectation, which they aren’t (at least not anymore than carpet munching without recompense).
Happens every place I’ve ever been. God, especially abroad. I will say the nicer the location, the less it happens, but it still happens. A lot.
It is the one thing that makes me mad enough to hit somebody.
I still don’t see it happening all that much but maybe that’s because I’ve generally only lived in really nice neighborhoods. I can’t really see any of the business men types who live here doing it. The closest I’ve gotten to “harassment” lately was a random vaguely skeevey looking dude asking if he could take my photo because he thought I was beautiful, when I was going into my building, but I wouldn’t count that as sexual harassment, just as kind of weird.
Then again, a lot of it has just been people outside bars trying to pick me up and I don’t really see that as harassment exactly.
I’ve lived in all kinds of neighborhoods (generally improving with time) and it happens everywhere and often, though more frequently in the shittier places. The suits around here do it all the time, and it makes me want to stab.
Wasn’t there an episode of *The Sopranos *that had the one head guy talking to his shrink about being ashamed to admit that he performed oral sex on his wife? It’s not “macho.” Women are expected to provide physical pleasure to men, without the reverse necessarily being true.
Note, I’m not saying all men are like this, or (hopefully) even a majority anymore.
The character who was performing oral sex was Uncle Junior–it got spread around and then Tony used it to make fun of him…which eventually led to the hit on Tony. “Cunnilingus and psychiatry have brought us to this!”
I don’t doubt that there’s perople out there who finds the idea irresistible; rule 36 and all that. But presumably Puma is/was looking for a larger market than the “public sex fetishist” demographic. The stripes in the background look like railings, FWIW, so I don’t think it’s supposed to be a bathroom.
Yeah, but apparently it was proposed as serious ad by a company looking for work. From here: “a small Eastern European agency affiliated with Saatchi & Saatchi created the ads on spec, trying to win business with a PUMA subsidiary.” So someone, presumably someone with advertising experience, thought it was a good ad.
Yeah, but I think it’s all but certain that more men would look favorably on a BJ without reciprocation than cunnilinigus without reciprocation. The idea that sex revolves around getting the guy off is by no means dead. (typing “cunnilinigus” just reminded me how much I rely on spellcheck… it’s not in the dictionary)
Re: the Puma ad, its origins may be murky, but Terry Richardson’s campaign for Belvedere Vodka has been printed plenty. In ads as in life, performing oral sex on a man isn’t inherently degrading – it’s all about context. As it is, most of these ads implying a woman has given/will give/owes a guy a blow job are run alongside ads telling them what products to use to please (usually unseen) men (weight loss pills, push-up bras), or alongside ads telling guys what products to buy (cars, hair gel) to attract half-naked models (or at least the parts of them seen in the ad i.e. boobs and legs).
[hijack]
There are only two i’s in cunnilingus. Or did I get whooshed?
[/hijack]
The asking for boys volunteers to move stuff always struck me as sexist, and I would volunteer. and more often as not was turned down. A few times they tried to harass some boy who did not want to do it while refusing my help. Sometimes, especially in middle school, I was obviously bigger and stronger than about half of the boys in class.
I have been asked to be on the rota to relieve the receptionist during lunch and they got angry when I refused. I went to my boss, a man who was not sexist at all, and he told me to tell them not to ask me to do any of that crap that they would not ask him to do. There was quite an argument, before they relented. I was a network specialist.
In another job, I would encounter walls in some customer interactions where they just would not comply with the instructions I gave them to accomplish what they wanted to do. I got a clue when he kept asking me to tell my manager his demands, which were to reconfigure the network for a global company for his personal convenience. I did confirm with a manager that had a technical background in what I was doing that what I was asking the customer to do was exactly what I should. He even got on the call and told them that I was correct and they needed to do what I asked if they wanted what they requested, but they would not. So I got together with one on my less technical male team mates and wrote him a script for what to ask for, and had him join the call. Only after a man directed them, would they make the changes. In some cases from the same location, on hearing me on the phone, they would excuse themselves and find some woman to talk to me. It was like having a translator, only I could understand what he said, but he refused to talk to me directly.
Throughout my career, I also have received several email complaints about how “my girl” was uppity on the phone from customers thinking that the person on the phone was not lee, but lee’s assistant. They have also complained that I was having “my girl” handle the tech stuff.
There was one driver’s ed teacher in my home town who never passed a female for driver’s ed in his entire career, failing even a friend of mine who was an excellent driver. He retired the next year after she was failed by him. He bragged about it and still he got to work until retirement.
KellyM was told in third grade that she was mistaken that her mother must be a nurse not a doctor.
My woodshop teacher had never given a girl an A…until he had me in his class. He told me that I changed his thinking about girls and woodshop. I was incredibly proud of myself. I still am, in fact.
While I was at the state fair last summer, I stopped at the Primax Windows booth to sign up for more information about window replacement. A woman called me a few days later to set up time for someone to come to my house to give an estimate. She asked for my husband’s name, and wanted to set up a time when he could be there. I thought that made sense from a sales point of view, since it would be easier to get us to make a decision on the spot. However, I told her that it wouldn’t be necessary. I was doing the “scouting” for various remodeling services before making any decisions. Since the house in question was my childhood home and the deed was in my name, my husband was willing to trust my judgment. The lady finally agreed to set an appointment as long as I reassured her that I was the sole owner of the house.
On the day of the appointment, two young salesmen showed up. They asked for my husband. No sale.
I have since gotten follow-up calls from them on my cellphone, which is in my name only, asking for my husband. They tell me that he had previously contacted them aboout window replacement. I tell them that not only has he never contacted them, but thay only have his name because they asked me for it when I discussed business with them.
Needless to say, they won’t be making any money from me.
Although boobs and legs may be the most interesting parts of half-naked models (at least, in some context), I would consider my car/hair gel/cologne to be performing its job poorly if I couldn’t pick up the girl attached to the legs/boobs.
