What is the most embarrassing thing you witnessed

In My Humble Opinion
1

For some reason I remembered something today I forgot about for years. So, I thought I would ask if anyone else had any other painfully embarrassing situations they have been witness too. It does not even necessarily something you have done.

The one that I remembered is when I was in high school. One day, there was a “talent” show. The whole school was called into the gymnasium to witness this event. Do you remember the song from the “Karate Kid” movie? I think it was called “The Glory of Love” or something like that. The chorus was something like:

I am the man who will fight for your honor,

I’ll be the hero you’re thinking(??) of… dah-dah-dah.*
Anyhow, the singer had the highest voice I think I have heard for a man. Well, this young man (about 16?) decided HE was going to sing the song for the talent show.

In the same key.

Oh, did I mention he was 15-16 and still going through puberty?

Well this poor kid got about 10 words out of the whole song on key. 1/2 way through he stopped and the pianist just kept playing and he was just standing there, head down. After the song, some people clapped (to be nice?) but most just sat there, silent. He ran out of the gym. It was just awful… I felt so badly for him.

Anyone else?

2

Tenth grade biology class.

Hormones raging, minds wandering, etc, etc.

Teacher has members of the class reading out of the textbook. Pretty girl sitting next to me is picked to read a passage.

“There are countless orgasms…err…umm…organISims in the ocean…”

Class was dead silent - you could hear a pin drop. Her face turned a thousand shades of red. I think we all experienced her embarrassment vicariously, though. No one said a word to her.

To this day, when I think of that moment, I get all anxious.

3

Earlier this year, I had an experience very similar to the one related by heembo. I teach 9th grade physical and Earth science. A cheerleader in my class was picked to read a passage about sedimentary rock layers. Part way through, when she should have read “These rock layers contain remains of organisms”, she said “These rock layers contain remains of orgasms” . The boys erupted in laughter, the girls gave a collective “ewwww!”, and the poor cheerleader was too flustered to continue reading. I tried my best to contain my own laughter, but couldn’t quite do it.

I find her version much more intriguing…did dinosaurs masturbate? And if so, are there huge deposits of dino jism lying about, waiting discovery?

Definitely one of the highlights of a long and ardous school year.

4

A couple years ago, my friends and I were at the pool. There was this girl who jumped off the diving board in a bikini type swimsuit. When she emerged from the pool, her top wasn’t covering everything it was supposed to. The worst thing was that no one said anything to her. So she really didn’t find out until she walked half way around the pool. I’m sooo glad that wasn’t me!!

5

City Basketball Tournament, 1987-ish.

All three public high schools in town, plus the biggest private one, compete in a round-robin tournament for city championship. It’s held at the Convention Center. About 4-5,000 fans are in attendance.

The cheerleaders from the private high school attempt a pyramid. The girls form the first two rows, and then they begin climbing up for the third row. That’s when it happened. :eek:

The last girl to take her position in the third row begins wobbling and shimmying back and forth and side to side, and finally falls to the floor. When she hits, her skirt lands in such a way that it falls mostly on her back, exposing her butt. Now, we’ve all seen cheerleaders a thousand times and know that they wear these colored undergarments to match their uniform colors (aren’t they called “candies”?). Not this girl. Nope, she forgot, and was just wearing her Strawberry Shortcake® underpants. In front of 5,000 people :eek:. But she was too overcome with embarassment from the fall to realize that she was showing her Underoos to God & everybody, and she just laid there on the floor. A fellow cheerleader whispered something in her ear, and she jumped up and ran from the floor, head buried in her hands.

6

Another high school memory. A girl reading something aloud in English pronounced “Grand Prix” is if it rhymed with tricks. “Good pun” said the teacher.

7

I didn’t witness it personally, but one of my (male) classmates in middle school was reading aloud something about the colonization of Virgina (in American History class). Except he read it as the “colonization of Vagina”.

I think middle school is prime time for Freudian slips.

8

BTW, I’m wondering when someone is going to come in with a story that ends with a cheerleader asking the science teacher, “but why does it taste so salty”?

9

BTW, for the OP: Peter Cetera - The Glory of Love

10

Senior year of high school. She was hugely overweight and had a serious pimple problem. She walked into Biology trailing a long tail of shit stained toilet paper.

I look back and cringe on her behalf. I don’t think I could have survived it.

11

It happened on the first day of my sophomore year in high school… my family had just moved to a new town halfway across California. I, a fairly shy kid, was sick with apprehension about being in a small-town school. In my previous schools I’d had two years of German and this new school was just starting to teach German, so the new German teacher had promised to show me off to all the kids just starting out. A demo conversation. I was sure I’d freeze up and look like a complete retard.

Just as the teacher introduced me to the rest of the class, one girl on the other side of the room hurled a bit of her lunch (this class was right after lunch). And then she puked a little more. Then the floodgates opened and she projectile-vomited all over her desk (the double-desk that one shares with another student side-by-side). As she thrashed she vomited on three or four other students. She tried to stand up but slipped and landed face-down on the table in the pool of chunky spew. And she was still vomiting. And vomiting. And vomiting.

Finally she stopped. But she just stayed there, face-down in the vomit.

Five, maybe ten seconds passed. Finally the teacher (eyes wide and face white as death) asked gently, even meekly, “Are you all right?”

Seconds passed. Finally she replied, still face-down, “NO, YOU STUPID FUCK, I’M NOT ALL RIGHT!”

Sobbing and weeping into the vomit, she lifted herself from the desk, chunks plastered all over her face, hair and new dress. She almost knocked the teacher over in her escape.

In the stunned silence one could hear vomit dripping off the table’s edge and hitting the floor. Then people started catching the stench. The teacher filed everyone out of the room and let us take the hour off.

This poor girl was utterly destroyed and all I could think of was, “HOLY SHIT!!! DID I JUST DODGE A BULLET, OR WHAT?!?”

I never did have to perform the demo conversation.

(By the way, the girl never showed back up to class. In fact, she not only moved to another school in another town, but her family packed up and moved.)

12

Almost forgot…

I never actually witnessed this, but at that school the year before, one of the wrestlers had been cutting weight for a tournament using any means at his disposal… including Ex-Lax. Except he didn’t take it early enough to make a difference at the weigh-ins, but he managed to make his weight anyway.

In one of his matches, he was on his way to pinning his opponent when the Ex-Lax finally did its thing. He let the kid loose, jumped up and bolted for the locker room.

I heard he didn’t make it.

(In stark contrast to the girl of the previous story, that guy was unfazed by the experience. In fact, he treated it almost like a twisted badge of honor.)

13

Fifth grade, and a bunch of us were hanging out between classes at an out-of-the-way outside corner of the school notorious as a place kids went to smoke or otherwise misbehave. We were forbidden to go there, and would get in trouble if caught by the MAN.

Suddenly someone said, “Run! Here comes the Vice-Principal!”

We all took off running, and as we came aroung the corner, in FULL VIEW of the entire student body (in the courtyard having lunch), this fat kid’s pants fell down, exposing him in his undies doing a brief superman impression as his pants caught his ankles! He ended up face first on the concrete, pants around his ankles… the entire school laughing at him!

I laughed and laughed and laug… wait a second! That fat kid was ME!!!

AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

[sup]true story, by the way! May help explain why I am so twisted now![/sup]

14

This happened when I was in the 3rd grade, and I remember it like it was yesterday. One of the kids in class was Billy G., and he, um, well, he shit in his pants.

He couldn’t get his mother on the phone - I think she was at work or something. Poor Billy spent half the day walking around with his backpack slung around his waist, and he just smelled awful. Finally a teacher or someone caught on and brought him to an office.

I was really glad nothing like that happened to me. There was one “jerk in the making” in class who reminded him of it nearly every day after that.

15

When I was a freshman in high school, we had a lip synch competition for homecoming week. Guess who got volunteered to lip synch to “I’m Fat” in front of the whole student body? Do you have any idea how long 3 minutes can feel in subjective time? :eek:

16

Thanks Coldfire. At least I knew the title. :slight_smile:

17

Four months ago. Playing wallyball with a group of adults at an open gym at a racquet club. Wallyball, for those who don’t know, is volleyball on a racquetball court. We were on one of those courts with a glass wall at the entry, so there were eight of us playing, and another group watching while they wait their turn.

Midway through the first game, this 50ish guy goes up to spike, grunts … and loses all control of his bowels. Splattering on the floor, running down his leg, even splashing one of the guys on the other team that was trying to block him. Just walks off the court muttering “sorry guys … guess I shouldn’t have played tonight.”

Hasn’t been back since to these twice-monthly open gym “parties” that he never used to miss a one of. Don’t expect to see him ever again.

18

I went to a summer camp a number of years ago. One kid about 14 at the time would always sleep in late. One of the counsellors decided to pull him out of bed. He carried the kid still in his sleeping bag in front of the communal area where we were all having breakfast. The counsellor then dumped the kid out of the sleeping bag and that’s when we all discovered he liked to sleep in the nude. He wrapped the sleeping bag around himself and ran back to his cabin. That was the last year he attended the camp.

19

Oh yeah, then there was the time in Jr.High English where we were reading stories we’d written out lout to the class. One young woman’s story involved her fighting an octopus, she’d made the mistake of using testicles everywhere instead on tentacles. Nobody felt her embarassment at the time because we were all laughing too hard.

20

I was discussing this thread with a co-worker. He related one his girlfriend told him a while back, he thinks she read about it in Cosmo or something… I cannot vouch for its authenticity, but tit was sooo bad I had to put it here.

A woman and her boyfriend were sitting by a pool. She was wearing real short cut off jean shorts. The guy spotted a loose thread on her cut offs and gave it a quick sure yank to cut it loose.

Well, it was not a thread from he cut-offs.

Poor girl.