I’m not sure if this counts as medical advice or what, but perhaps it can squeak by under the line. I’m just looking for facts.
Several people in my family are alcoholics. My uncle on my mother’s side committed suicide because alcholism screwed up his life, and my aunt is broke and basically homeless at age 55 for the same reason. My mom and dad, on the other hand, are both fine - as is my other uncle.
Regardless, because of my family history, and the fact that I’m weenie who always obeys the law (except speed limits), I long ago decided that I would not even touch alcohol until I was 21, figuring that if I was going to have a problem with it, I don’t need to deal with the illegality on top of everything else.
However, I will be 21 soon, and I find myself thinking about whether I should even take the risk. I am living a pretty damn good life at the moment, and I would like to avoid screwing it up.
So, I’m wondering - what is the current state of medical knowledge about alcoholism? Does it run in families? Is there a test for it? Are people born alcoholics, or is it an acquired dependency? If I am genetically predisposed towards alcoholism, is it still possible for me to consume alcohol and simply avoid the disease by maintaining self-control?
Wish I had some answers for you, but I don’t. Still, we have a lot of recovering alcoholics on the board, as well as at least one medical doctor who I believe is an addiction specialist.
Well let’s see, I’ll weigh in as someone in recovery who is a psychologist [though not practicing-just got the letters after my name…].
The current state of medical knowledge on alcoholism can best be defined with cites, so here is one of the best, most current cites I have. I’ve bought the entire series on addiction, and passed it onto friends and family. Scroll through and look into the alcohol areas. Alcoholism fits a disease model, but loosely at best.
Alcoholism is shown to run in families, though not everyone get’s it who has a parent or grandparent with it. There is a list of questions on the AA website that many people use as a barometer for alcoholism. But there is no medical test I am aware of. Yes, if you are predisposed to alcoholism, meaning you have it heavily in your genes from both sides, you can still avoid being an alcoholic. Many, many people do. My wife is a perfect example of that. She has it on both sides, yet is a normal drinker.
If I were you I’d pick up a couple books that have a great track record to showing people a path towards further understanding alcoholism in a family and it’s transcendents on through the generations.
Toxic Parents
ACOA - Adult children of Alcoholics.
Are the ones that come to mind. the latter is more of a group of texts, not one book. If you’d like more empirical evidence look up a local ALANON meeting, and see how others cope, deal, and live with alcoholics, or alcoholic family members.
And feel free to email me for further info if you’d like.
Addendum: You sound like someone who has a good head on your shoulders, and if you are thinking about this before you are legally able to drink, then you are a step ahead. However, alcoholism is a subtle foe, cunning and baffling, that can wait for anyone…Sounds a little cosmic, but most in recovery know what I mean. Staying aware is your best defense.
There is a lot of good information here about the myths of alcoholism: Apple Fanboy
There may be a few things there you hadn’t considered yet. Basically, I believe that you are NOT doomed to a life of alcoholism. More than likely you can have a social drink now and then and control yourself. If you find that’s difficult for you, you might have to rethink that point of view. But I really think a great deal of what we believe about alcoholism (first and foremost that it’s a disease at all) is demonstrably false. I hope you get something out of reading from that link.
Unfortunately the only test is trial by fire and the results aren’t immediately apparent. Living without alcohol isn’t hard though. If you’ve made this far without and have concerns if you don’t drink you won’t get drunk.
Let’s see. Dad, brother, self. Yep. Runs in my family.
Bog, Bog’s Dad, Bog’s Granddad. Runs in his family. (my poor kids are getting confirmed 3 generations on one side and 2 on the other!)
Knowing what it did to me, I’d say don’t take the chance. However, that makes me a hypocrite, since I knew and did it anyway.
For me, it didn’t start out as anything more than a few Social Beverages. Over the years it escalated to a 12-pack-a-night plus shots, case-a-day on weekends. Each person is different.
Now, after 12 years without a drink, it’s not a part of my life anymore. At all. 12 years ago, it had total control over me.
If you are living a pretty damn good life at the moment without alcohol, why change? If you can drink successfully your life might be marginally better. If you can’t then your life can become tragically worse. The upside gain is tiny compared to the downside risk.
In monetary terms you’ve already got a million dollars (a pretty good life). Would you invest in something that would make you an extra 5 grand if it had substantial risk of losing you the whole million?
On the other hand, I’d say the OP has already demonstrated above-average self control; since the majority of college students do drink (link), and I’m sure the majority of those students don’t care a rat’s patootie that it’s illegal for the vast majority of them. Yet the OP has successfully said “No thanks” for, presumably, three and a half years. To me that indicates that s/he has the sense to drink moderately, and to still say “No” when in his or her better interests.
In my experience, as a child of an alcoholic (and grandchild)…if you stress too much about whether or not you are going to drink you might end up in a worse place than if you just live your life as a normal person not pre-disposed to alcoholism.
I have friends who were all “scared” of alcohol while we were in college and they thought about not drinking so much and went to such heights to avoid it and it completely overwhelmed them and they started drinking heavily once they were out of school.
It’s like if you’re trying to diet and you go to an extreme by eating nothing but celery and cottage cheese every day all day. Sure, it will give you the desired effect but I guarantee one day you will wake up in a haze underneath a pile of pizza boxes and ice cream cartons and the whole celery idea will be out the window. Better to just stick with a healthy eating plan that you can reasonably live with for the rest of your life.
So note that if a person pre-disposed to alcoholism isn’t going to have one drink and become instantly drunk or feel the urge to slam a twelve pack. But if you let it stress you out so much that the IDEA of one drink freaks you out and you say to yourself “oh well I guess I am just going to have to get smashed now! I am doomed!” then that will probably be your fate.
Just think rationally. What do you think of your alcoholic relatives? How do you feel when you see them drunk? Do you want people to think of you that way? Do you want to feel like them?
Keeping that in the front of your mind is much more sobering than being afraid of alcohol.
I’m from a similar family – father, a couple of cousins, a half-dozen or more cousins all are alcoholic.
Like the OP is considering, I have made the decision to simply not drink alcohol at all. I did try it some in HS & college, and I really didn’t think it tasted that great. And the damage it does to people’s lives can be horrible. I felt that my family heredity might make me more susceptible to abusing alcohol, so I decided not to take that risk.
I can have just as much fun at parties as all the drinkers (just watching the antics of the drunks staggering around), and I don’t have a hangover the next morning. I haven’t been aware of missing anything by not drinking for 50-some years, and I don’t feel burdened or restricted at all.
So if you feel that way, then go with it. Why take the risk at all if you don’t feel any need to do so?
Just to clarify, I’m not a board-certified addictionist. But I have studied addiction medicine extensively, under a variety of mentors well-known and respected in the field of addiction. And I do routinely detox patients from alcohol, opiates, and benzodiazepines.
However, I do not give formal addiction treatment beyond detox.
To address the OP: It depends.
Alcoholism and other substance abuse runs strongly in families, but genetics is not destiny. While one’s chances of being alcoholic are higher if one has alcoholic parents or other 1st degree relatives, it’s not automatic.
Meanwhile, many alcoholics come from families where normal or no drinking was typical, and no family history of alcoholism is noted.
Some alcoholics feel that they were born with their disorder, and it needed only alcohol to activate it, others felt that it developed over time and was influenced by circumstances and other life events.
There’s really no good test to tell what’s likely to happen to you if you take a drink. Unless you’ve had experience with other addictive substances, such as nicotine, or prescription meds. If you had significantly positive mood-altering effects from nicotine, opiate-based pain med, or benzodiazepines, and had to struggle a bit to get off of them, then I’d guess (and that’s what it is, an educated guess) that alcohol is more likely to be problematic.
Also: If you have mental health issues or diagnoses such as bipolar, or depression, then your risk may be higher for future problems with alcohol.
Ditto if you are gay/lesbian (not that these are mental health issues). Now this is just correlation, not causation. It just seems that the wiring for sexual preference/identity may be closely tied to the wiring for substance abuse. Or maybe the stresses that homosexuals deal with in our society induce more substance abuse (tho I am not partial to this latter hypothesis myself).
At any rate, someone in your situation should look realistically at the possible benefits of drinking for them, and weigh them against the possible liabilities, then make your choice.
As for the “sense” to drink moderately, because you’ve been rational so far: Don’t count on that. I was a rational, goal-directed college & medical student, with enough self-control to be a high achiever, and be perceived by my friends, colleagues and family as a safe, solid, reliable, rule-respecting, idealist. But drugs and alcohol eventually made me toss all that aside.
Fortunately, it’s now been over 16 and a half years since my last drink or drug.
I’ve got, let’s see, my dad and dad’s sister are in AA. dad’s mom and dad’s dad drank up until the day they died, and then there’s my brothers and sisters. My oldest brother drinks too much, but he’s not ready to quit. The rest of us are okay, so far. Like you, I was terrified to drink because of my family’s history. I had my first beer on my 21st birthday, and it was good, but not great. I like having a drink or two every once in a while, mainly beer, but I do like gin and tonic’s. Oh, and screwdrivers. I hate wine, but I’ll drink a glass of champagne with my mom every once in a while.
I know it could snap back on me anytime. I do have an addictive personality, but I’m far more addicted to food and caffeine than alcohol.
One fact that’s useful in discussions like this is that most studies find that approximately 30% of Americans are nondrinkers. It’s worth keeping that in mind if you feel like you should drink because “everybody does it.” Ultimately you will have to weigh the risks of alcohol use (and potential abuse) against the benefits (social, health, personal enjoyment) to you.
Drinking has never made anyone more intelligent!
Drinking has never made anyone more attractive!
Drinking has never made anyone more pleasant to be with!
My Father died drinking and driving. His mother died of cirrhosis of the liver a few years before him. Drinking almost killed me and when I quit it was several years before I got my life back together.
In my personal opinion, ethyl alcohol in its myriad of forms has ruined more lives than all the other drugs combined.