I do seem to be in the minority around here–but I just can’t stand CW vol 2. My wife agrees with me on this, but we’re both hardcore hopheads; overly malty beers just don’t do it for us–and CW2 is about as overly malty a beer as I’ve ever had. The Sorghum just kills it for me. (And also neither of us have ever cared much for bourbon-barrel aged beers.)
Granted, what I’ve heard from many sources verifies that is true, and that’s great if you’re in Holland, but I’m in America, where Heineken is consistently terrible (note the emphasis); it’s impossible that every Heineken I’ve ever had just happens to be a bad one, and I’m not alone. So actually, it does.
My friend and I stopped in at a bar that was running a promotion for LandShark Lager. We were given an shot-sized sample of it and could not even choke that down.
Speaking of Olde English 500, my friend had a 5 year old 20 oz. can in his fridge. No one had guts to actually drink it, so after it failed to get drafted in our annual beer draft during the NFL draft this year we took it out to the shooting range and put it out of its misery.
The worst beer I ever had was a skunked can of Milwaukee’s Best Ice that had been left in the condo I rented in Hilton Head. Took one sip, nearly puked and poured the rest down the drain.
Worst non-skunked? Probably Natty Light.
I was really pleasantly surprised by most China regional beers, good stuff 
The worst I had was at a little bar in Jinan, they had a Guinness sign on the wall, so I asked if they actually had any. They brought a literally dusty bottle out from the back room, warm and unrefrigerated. It was nasty and spoiled, cloyingly sweet and syrupy. The small print on the label was in Chinese, so I had a friend translate it later. It had apparently been bottled and distributed from Singapore, and was at least 3 years old.
[bolding mine]
And you drank it anyway?! I’m sorry, my friend, but that one is on you.
That’s too bad, I like wheat beer, one of my go to types really.
That’s made by Flying Dog, which has moved to Frederick, Maryland in the last couple of years. I like the majority of their stuff, but I’ve heard really bad things about this brew and I’ve refused to even try it. I haven’t heard anyone say they like it at all.
I don’t remember what the brand was, but 4-5 years ago I tried some strawberry beer in a can. Thank og I only bought one because it was full of salt and after two sips I poured the thing out.
I love Flying Dog’s Pearl Necklace. I recently nearly pissed my pants when my wife said out loud, “My mom would like a pearl necklace, honey.”
(Her mom was visiting, tried one and wanted another.)
The aforementioned Cave Creek and Beer 30 are both quite awful. For my money, though, Schlitz is slightly worse. It has a nasty metallic tang that makes me think it might be leaching something out of the cans it comes in. Blech.
Going against prevailing opinion here, I liked Sam Adams Cranberry Lambic, though admittedly it did seem miscategorized. It tasted more like a Berliner Weisse than any lambics I’ve had. This isn’t a style that a lot of people are familiar with in the US, and I could understand the tartness being off-putting.
The one beer I absolutely could not finish was Jenlain Bière de Garde. I don’t know if the particular bottle I had was horribly mistreated, or if there was some industrial accident when it was being fermented, but it smelled and tasted like glue…or maybe permanent markers. Even the worst of my homebrewing mishaps never came out like that. Hopefully it wasn’t a representative example of the style.
These are purely my opinions, and not based on any chemical analyses. Please don’t sue me.
It’s been years, but I honestly don’t remember any sour tang in that cranberry lambic, at least not to typical lambic or Berliner weisse levels (and I love me a good Berliner weisse). That’s part of the reason I was confused–it had none of the tartness I expected. Tasted nothing like a lambic or any other sour beer. I love Sam Adams, but that one just tasted like stale beer with a hint of cranberry, from what I remember.
I can’t stand to drink the mass-produced ale that used to predominate in English pubs - stuff like John Smiths, Boddingtons, Tetley. Fortunately, real ale is now taking over, but it’s a disgrace that those beers were allowed to establish themselves - a travesty akin to the moneychangers setting up shop in the temple of God.
Newcastle brown ale is a bad beer that is the beneficiary of unbelievable marketing success. No one under 60 drinks bottles of brown any more, so the fact that a bad brown ale can be exported around the world is remarkable.
Along the same lines, leffe can be found in every supermarket in the UK, marketed out the bazoo. It’s not egregiously bad, just very ordinary, which is unacceptable for a style where excellence is expected.
I’ve judged beers from the local contest level, to the state fair level, to national professional competitions. I will exclude amateur beers because, as silenus notes, they often are quite formidable in their loathsomeness.
A few commercial breweries have had problems over the years with infections, the ones that stand out notably in my mind are Millstream in Iowa, Sprecher in Milwaukee, and New Holland in Michigan. The latter two have cleaned up their acts and are now dependable and make some great beers
I don’t know about Millstream because the beer I sampled from them at the Great Taste of the Midwest a few years back was so horrifyingly bad that I can’t imagine trying anything from them again. It tasted as if someone had vomited into the kettle and then extra vomit was added at kegging.
Cave Creek Chili is mind-bogglingly awful. I think I still have a few bottles somewhere in my beer cave* that were given to me over the years as part of “novelty” 6 packs. I should go put them on fence posts and use them for target practice. Same goes for that Banana Lambic that is in a green bottle.
*Yes, I have an actual cave in the basement of my house. It’s old.
And I just saw Busy Scissor’s post above mine and can’t believe I forgot Newcastle Brown. Insipid garbage. I try to think the best of everyone, but if I see someone willingly drink more than one Newkie Brown, I assume they are a necrophiliac serial killer.
I once bought bottled Newcastle from a convenience store and it tasted like it had gone skunked. There’s a place that sells it on-tap not far from where I live and I’ve been considering giving it another chance. However, judging from the reviews here, I get the impression “skunked” is its actual flavor.
Pearl Light. Watery.
Red Stripe. Tastes like piss.
.
Wow, I’d forgotten all about RWB. I, too, remember it from college. Its only redeeming quality was the price. Horrible stuff. I drank my share, though.
My worst is from a dive trip about 15 years ago; a Nassau beer called “Hammerhead”. I was only able to choke down about half of it.
And I’ll add to those who say that Heineken isn’t that bad if you get one in Europe. Apparently it just doesn’t travel well.
The mainstream ‘ice beers’ that Anheuser Busch marketed in the early 90’s. They didn’t just cause headaches, I think they were made of headaches.