It’s always the guy with the talented tongue that winds up getting blamed when two chicks start fighting.
Why is that?
You’re a student nurse who needs to practice her abdominal assessment skills before the big exam next week. Where, oh, where will you find a mature man to practice on? You meet the nicest construction worker/firefighter/other hunky male. You need to examine him inch by inch; he needs to lie still and not distract you while you study him. Gently probe, push, etc. Nature takes her course.
Worked for me when I was a student nurse way back when…
He is a Soldier, what? who is traveling back to the war. He came home on leave and discovered his wife has left him while he was deployed. The Soldier just wants a beautiful woman to talk to before he has to return to his unit the following morning. The Unit has suffered some losses and morale is low. What would really make him happy and better able to serve his Country is to meet someone he could write to while he is away.
Hubby would have to be ok with a haircut to really play the role.
Maybe a couple of drinks could loosen up his tongue and you could be the understanding woman.
SSG Schwartz
Wow. It’s bad enough that his wife left him. His eyes were damaged in service to his country, too? That sucks! 
He is a counter-intelligence officer with the CIA. He has just stolen nuclear launch codes back from a secret Russian alliance trying to return the Motherland to its former glory through manipulation and coercion.
He has just been betrayed by his immediate superior (on the Russians’ payrool, apparently), which resulted in a five-minute shootout/car chase during which nobody seemed to reload and he escaped death by a hair’s breadth several times. He has managed to escaped his pursuers for a moment by ducking into a random bar.
You are married to an architect who has no room in his busy schedule for maintaining his relationships, yet seems to show a lot of affection toward his new secretary, Cindee. Your husband just left on a four-day “business trip” with said secretary. You find yourself alone at a local bar, in a booth because you don’t feel like socializing (you have no friends because you met Mr. Architect on vacation, and the whirlwind courtship and marriage moved you 1,500 miles from home).
A strange man slides discreetly into your booth and tries to strike up a converation, keeping his eyes toward the door the entire time. After a few thinly-veiled “get lost” comments on your part, the door opens and he swoops in for a kiss to avoid showing his face. The kiss lasts a few second longer than it needs to.
It turns out, he needs a place to hide for a while…
Whaddaya think, too hackneyed?
I am afraid I will have to see a cite for that post. 
SSG Schwartz
I think this could work!
Have him get fitted for a prosthetic 3rd arm and 2nd head, then approach you in the bar after you have struck up a conversation with some other guy. He would approach you and say, “Hey! Is this guy boring you? Why don’t you talk to me. I’m from another planet. Wanna see my space ship? C’mon… let’s blow this popsicle stand and rearrange the alphabet and put U and I together.”
Just don’t take the extra time to go after your handbag before you leave with him.
He’s a mysterious stranger with no memory of who he is or where he is from (but with an impressive collection of scars). He forces you to help him avoid his pursuers, which involves changing clothes and locations.
Of course, the special word to “activate” him is Treadstone, and then
he slaughters everyone in the restaurant with two toothpicks and a menu and you start to wonder whether this is such a good idea…
Si
He should go as Glen Quagmire and you are, of course, Lois.
Giggety-giggety
*
Allllll-riiigghhtt!*
You should call him, “Farm Boy” a lot…
…and he should answer all your requests with, “As you wish.”
You’re going to be in WV? That’s a no-brainer: he can pretend to be your brother.
I was born and raised there, and figure I might as well say it before someone else does.
Better yet, he’s some kind of laborer…and she finds out he’s her brother AFTER she’s had sex with him!
You say “hackneyed” like it’s a bad thing.
That’s just dumb. It’s WV. You don’t go to a bar to pick up your brother. You fuck your brother back at your trailer to get ‘warmed up’, go to the bar and pick up your uncle. Duh. 
I’m not actually from WV. I recognize all my immediate relatives by sight! Again, duh!
norinew,
You missed my post at the end of the first page (I hate when my post is at the end of a page…)
Of course, for added amusement, you could talk quietly in the bar for a while, and then when there’s a brief silence, you could distinctly say “Two hundred bucks for the hour, dude” and he could say “Okay”, and then the two of you leave together.
This better not be one of those threads that doesn’t get updated after the event.
What are you going as? Will you be you, having an affair? A single woman?
I think he should be a vampire or a serial killer. Or you both could be serial killers!
ah, to look like a 19-year-old Robin Wright! Or to have a shot at a 20-something Cary Elwes. Sigh.
Well, you won’t get the “down and dirty” details, but I promise to update on Tuesday and let you all know how it went (well, the ones of you who care, anyway).
I haven’t made any final decisions yet. I’ll decide by Friday and email him the details (but not on his work account! :eek: ) He won’t be home until Friday night (he works out of town), and though we’ll have hours in the car on Saturday morning, once I make my decisions, I don’t want to intrude on the illusion any more than I have to!
You are the cougar (growl) and he is a young investment banker surfer rock climber nonsmoker long haired sensitive type. He is fixacted by you from across the room, but slides into the booth to meet you. You are looking at a book, something significant, he will change you from a somewhat humourless but passionate and impatient dirty talking heartless bitch in heels to the next level of youuuurrrrr Ultimate fantasy!
dont forget the trojans!
::melts::
…You people are all weirdos. [/SamTheEagle]