Seriously, a lot of people don’t learn this by 18 (I didn’t, and it caused me lots of heartache). If you haven’t, then by all means make it a priority. In every situation where you feel inclined to take offense or have a bad reaction to another person’s actions or words, stop and tell yourself not to take it personally, because it very rarely is. Lather, rinse, repeat until you’ve got it down.
Another important thing: learn to take responsibility for your own health & well-being. That means eating food that is nutritious (most of the time, at least) and getting some exercise. That means recognizing when you need rest, and getting it. That means getting suspicious changes in your body checked. That means having the means (if at all within your ability) to pay for medical insurance and/or doctor visits and meds you may need if you get sick/injured.
It takes more than compassion and intelligence to not be a loser. You must be both willing and able to compete. Or else where are all these friends, dates, spouses and jobs supposed to come from?
One of the things competitiveness requires is the ability to tolerate and thrive in an environment where people are not on your side. Another is the ability to overcome both compassion and intelligence when necessary.
What we need in life may not actually be a scarce resource, but there are enough people out there who play the game as if it is that you better play by their rules.
This is just my opinion. I believe competitiveness is the root of most evil. It is not a trait that I seek out in people. Yeah, there are things (and maybe people) you have to fight for, but I don’t think competition is something that should be encouraged. It brings out the ugly in both parties.