We occasionally get some freelance street preachers here, too. I used to shop at a grocery store with a parking lot that some guy had staked out as his pulpit. He was there every time I went shopping, early in the morning, late at night. I complained to the manager once, when this guy was particularly annoying (he’d noticed some D&D related bumper sticker on my car and felt the need to tell me that I was surely, surely going to Hell), and was told that he had permission to preach in their parking lot. So I found another grocery store.
Some just preach on the sidewalks. There was one woman who had a house with a wooden fence around the back yard. She was in an old neighborhood, and that block used to have two rows of houses, but now the street had expanded, one row of houses had been bought up and turned into more street lanes by the city, so her back yard faced a major street. She had a treehouse in a large tree, and she’d painted various sayings and slogans on the fence, facing the street. In fair weather, she’d sit in her treehouse and call out to the people riding down the street that they were all sinners and going to hell and other pleasantries. Some time ago, either she sold her house and moved, or she got locked up. I kind of miss her, you don’t get that kind of entertaining lunacy every day. Well, I guess you do, if you’re her neighbor.
Standard stuff mostly: Mormons & JW. In college I had some Wiccan friends who were very mildly evangelical & the generic Christians from the Christian Athletes & Farmhouse frat.
The wierd one a couple years ago was a pair of Bahá’í, mom & daughter I think, who lived in my apartment building and knocked on my door one day.
It has actually been years since I’ve been ‘missioned’ except for once walking home from the grocery store, but I just kept going. There do some to be fewer these days or I’m just lucky and always manage to miss them.
The last time was when I was in graduate school in Denton and moved into an old, run down apartment near the football field in the area know as the UNT ghetto. In fact before I moved in, the place had been emptied of the druggies, prostitutes and the like, so for a while I and one other guy lived in the unit.
Anyway, it was after a long night of studying and I heard a knock on the door Saturday morning. Opening it, there were two young girls, probably high school age, who I think were JW’s since they wore flowery sun dresses, if I recall correctly. I told them I wasn’t interested and looked out past them and did not see any others with them. Then I told them they they probably shouldn’t be knocking on doors around there. I don’t recall what they said after, but they handed me some pamphlets which I dropped on the floor and fell back into bed.
Nothing ever at home in Omaha–that I recall. I’ve been approached by Amway people in bookstores maybe three times.
When I lived in Urbana IL, the JWs came around about once a quarter. One time a lady came around and led by having her 10-year-old son give the spiel. That kinda sucked, but they didn’t get in the house.
Funny thing was that we had two LDS missionaries living in the basement apartment for over two years. They never bothered us once.
JW’s mostly, a couple of LDS, and way too much Scientology associated with a former employer and many employees but none of that was at my home. I only occasionally had to duck and run past them in the parking lot if I was visiting the Pasadena office.
I’ve only had Mormons and JWs come to my door. When I was a churchie, I patrolled some neighborhoods Baja California and Idaho’s Silver Valley as a “missionary” for the Assembly of God - not some of my proudest moments.
Anyway, at my current apartment complex we live four blocks from the LDS church. I see their missionaries on the street frequently, but my elderly apt. manager is friends with some local Mormons and expressed long ago on no uncertain terms that she didn’t want their missionaries visiting our complex. So I haven’t had to deal with any missionaries until recently:
I visit with my apt. manager over coffee and the Price is Right just about every morning and some Jehovah’s Witnesses dropped by during this routine. As soon as they made it past pleasantries, Nina told the missionaries that we were both Mormon, which she claims makes JWs hoof it fast. Not only did we have coffee cups in our hands, the coffee pot on her counter is prominently visible from the front door… But the JWs did go away
Not all coffee is caffeinated, and coffee isn’t the only thing that is brewed in coffee pots and put in coffee cups. My opthamologist is a Seventh Day Adventist, and he used to drink Postum all day long.
But as long as the JWs went away, I guess it’s good.
Arizona is like Ground Zero 2 for Mormons, so we get a fair number of them. I’ve also had Jehovah’s Witnesses and several youth outreach program missionaries and “donation seekers”.
It’s funny though, regardless of their individual takes on faith, they are all, to a person, uninterested in talking to the large man “holding back” the snarling Italian Mastiff when I open the door to receive their teachings. How great is your faith, really, when you’re not willing to risk (what you perceive to be) the threat of a mauling?
In reality the dog will only attack on my (or my wife’s) specific verbal command or hand signal, but my hand signal for “bluff and bluster” is very subtle and I encourage her whenever missionaries, beggars or solicitors come to the door.
I do not answer the door unless I am expecting a visitor. My friends and family consider me a bit out there, but they play along.
I did have Jehovas Witnesses approach me when I was doing yard work that involved a chainsaw. I’m in a rural location and rarely have anyone stop, but these fools walked up behind me and tapped on my shoulder, scaring the crap outa me. While I’m holding/revving a chainsaw.
I freaked out on them, pointing out that someone coulda lost a limb.
A priest from the Catholic church down the street stops by about once year with a church member, usually in the summer. I’m never home, but my husband is, he usually invites them in and offers them water.
I think living in an apartment, we get left alone aside from fliers stuck in the door, since most people won’t buzz anyone in unless they know them. The fliers come from all different places, JWs, Mormons, a few Baptist churches, and yes, Scientology, as there is a big church of Scientology right near us.
Do LaRouchies count as missionaries? I ran into one in undergrad, and was too polite to walk away. I still couldn’t help rolling my eyes at their “plans.”
Heh, this is a great story. It’s exactly what would happen if a missionary would try this in my house.
I was a very sheltered kid in elementary school, and we later moved to a larger home at the end of a long (1/4 mile) driveway. I must have been ten or so, but I let Mormon missionaries into the house. 30 seconds later my babysitter walks to the door, took one look at them and immediately asked them to leave, amid my protests (but they just wanted to give me a free book!). I had NO idea why an offer of a free book should be passed up.
The last missionaries i got were JWs and two Mormon boys. I have never gone out on missionary work and do not belong to a church.
I know where all the churches are here no matter what flavour …big, small, Catholic, Baptist, Presbyterian, Orthodox, and if i wanted to … i would, but right now i don’t have much use for religion.
It helps a lot if your dog is protection trained. Bluff and bluster is my term for engaging the dog to do everything but actually attack, and that’s been the hardest part to teach any of the dogs I’ve trained. It’s something most dogs are naturally wired to do, barking a warning at the door, etc., but it’s a real training chore to get them to do it on command.
