Anytime there’s been a discussion of number of past sexual partners on this board, the most common answer is “I’m more concerned that they have a clean bill of health.”
All well and good, but what percentage of sexually active adults actually have regular STD tests? If I were to guess, I would say that maybe 0.3% of people between the ages of 18 and 24 get tested between partners (if ever), and that’s probably a generous estimate.
Now sure, you may say “just be safe and wear a condom,” but people rarely (if ever) use a condom when having oral sex, and herpes can be transmitted by something as innocent as kissing. And given such ambiguous terms as “hooking up” it can be almost impossible to gauge through casual conversation if someone is sexually promiscuous or not.
When I randomly hooked up with my ex a while back, I ended up not going all the way with her. Granted, there were a lot of reasons for me not to have sex with her that night, but at one point I actually said the words “maybe you should get tested before we have sex.” Quite the mood killer. But she had told me on a previous occasion that she and her ex had had a few condom breakage incidents, and he had cheated on her twice over the course of their relationship, so God knows what he may have been carrying.
So how realistic is it to ask someone in their early 20s for proof of sexual health?