What Radioactive Creature Do YOU Want to be Bitten By?

You’re lucky. I was going to do that but I forgot.

P.S. I loved his outfit. We need a Fistie smilie.

I want to be bitten by a radioactive bat!

Wait…it’s been done.

By whom? Bruce Wayne wasn’t bitten by anything except for an insatiable urge to wear tights.

The Onion wasn’t the only one who’s done this before.

Iid like to be bitten by a radioactive duck-billed platypus. I’m not sure what super-powers that would give me, but I’d sure look cool.

I want to be bitten on the ass by a radioactive parent.


Squid. I would look good with tentacles, jet propulsion, and colour-changing skin. Well, better than I do now, anyway.


I supposedly implied that I was about to say “Batman!” but then realized that there is already a Batman. I love Batman, though, and would rather be bitten by a radioactive bat than lose my parents (although didn’t Spidey lose his parents, too?)


When danger calls, I could leap out of my ottercave, slide down the hill on my belly, find the criminal where I’d flip him onto my chest and bang on him with a rock!

Now that’s justice… otter-style!

Radioactive chinchilla!

Super running and jumping powers, super-hearing and the ability to see in the dark, and razor-sharp teeth that can graw through any obstacle! Only problem is that you have to roll in dust periodically to maintain your fur…


Okay, so we’re assuming that the radioactive bite doesn’t kill you, but rather gives you superpowers representative of the creature who gnoshed on you?

Godzilla. No question about it. :smiley:

A badger! Then, my enemies could taunt me by saying “Badgers? We don’t need no stinking badgers!” :slight_smile:
Actually I’d pick a winged monkey, 'cause their cool! I like winged monkeys!

A radioactive butterfly!!!

Or a sea sponge could be cool. Regenerating from anything and all that.

I’d like to be bitten by a radioactive roadrunner. that way I could run really fast. I’m one of those guys who takes about 11 minutes to run a mile, it would be so cool to do one in 45 seconds.

Plus I could say ‘Meep-Meep’!

A sperm whale!

I would lurk in the Atlantic, off the coast of New York, snacking on Steve Wright and his friends and waiting with my approximately 8 foot penis for Eve to come to the shore, where I would impress her so much she would be mine forever.
See you at Coney Island, Evie.

Dammit, CalMeacham beat me to it! I picked a radioactive cat too. I’d like to have cat ears and be able to do that cool “I meant to do that” look cats can do when they do something stupid.

The ability to fall asleep in eleven seconds flat would be nice too.

A Wienerdog!

Just picture it! I’d low to the ground, so I’d be hard to hit. Streamlined for aerodynamic speed, and best of all, I’d have my NUCLEAR YAP!

As Atomo, the Golden Wienerdog, no criminal could withstand me! And for a sidekick, I could have a huge, broad-beamed woman with pointy glasses and a beehive hairdo, a la Gary Larson, with a golden leash!