What "real" wealth is all about; "authentic Indian cuisine" (Winston Smith in UK)...

Well, I’ll agree with you that many Mexican restaurants in the US (and elsewhere) serve what seems like industrial waste; we get that even here in California, especially in chain restaurants. However, I would say that one can find fresh, totally non-greasy, wonderful Mexican food in the US, although it is often not easy to track down. I would say that inspired Mexican food is rarer still; even though I live in the “foodie heaven” of the SF Bay Area, getting a truly memorable Mexican meal (IMHO) involves a trip to Watsonville (about 80 miles from SF and 50 miles from where I am in Silicon Valley).

I think Winston might actually be 36. I am intrigued by his cookies, however:

Those must be magic diet cookies if you can eat a steak dinner and drink port, and still lose 10 pounds!

Ah, you mean £ in the casino, not lbs. in the restaurant.
[Emily Litella]* Never mind! *[/Emily Litella]

Ha! No, I’m 36, and evidently my math skills are seriously lacking.

Yes, I had cod and chips for lunch yesterday, with vinegar on my chips. Yum yum. We got it at a take away shop and ate back at the office. Three cheers for the BIG LUNCH!

I’d be happy to tell you more about my cookies. What would you like to know? :wink: And, look what I found: £

I’m on a double-decker red bus. I am certain the driver is either suicidal or homicidal - not sure which, though. I went directly to the upper deck and front row, but it was nervewracking. I’m now “safely” back on the streets. Maybe I’ll just walk today. :slight_smile:

Winston! Welcome to my home town! Some helpful tips to get you through your time here with the minimum of fuss:

  1. When in a restaraunt, to attract the attention of a waitperson, raise the index and middle fingers on both your hands and wave them vigorously in the air. He will regard you as a local and treat you with special care and attention.

  2. Should you visit one of the several locations of royal residence in the city, you will note some cheerful-looking fellows in bearskins and red jackets standing outside. These are, like yourself, tourists, who have rented costumes to blend into the crowd. They may, however, be a little shy. Try engaging them in cheerful conversation- they will appreciate it. If they don’t relax, a full-body massage may be called for.

  3. You will observe many red upright boxes with glass panes in them scattered throughout the city. These are public conveniences, at the disposal of anyone caught short in the city. Some wag may have sprayed the word “telephone” on them- take no notice and urinate away. This will mark you instantly as a knowledgeable fellow.

  4. There are many historic monuments in the city, from the Tower of London to Buckingham Palace. By special act of Parliament, any building over 100 years old is a monument, open to the public free of charge. The odd local may try to stop you entering, with some feeble protestations about entrance fees or private property. These cheery cockneys are merely trying to gull you, but will freely admit their mischief and stop if you treat them in an appropriately straightforward and forthright manner. Vigorous use of an umbrella or cane to beat aside a particuarly recalcitrant mendicant is encouraged.

  5. The British are a polite and humble people, and as a consequence are not quite so enthusiatic about engaging in conversation with strangers as the average American. To break the conversational ice quickly and efficently, enquire as to the Londoner’s sexual inclination. Do not, however, use any euphemisms- this would be an unforgivable breach of etiqutte. The correct method is to simply enquire “So, are you a poofter then? You certainly look like one?!”. Large, shaved, tattoed men sitting next to you on buses or trains are especially suseptible to this approach. You will soon be firm friends.

Should you get the chance, you may wish to tour some of our great British hospitals, the fruit of the NHS, while here. Following these guidelines will mean that you don’t miss these delightful visits, guarenteed fun for all the family.

I’m standing outside Buckingham Palace, and one of the guards slipped and fell whilst executing his turn. Poor guy. I heard some laughter and heckling off to my left, and a few moments later another guard came out, presumably to make sure he was all right and got him dusted off. He’s off marching again now, apparently no worse for wear.
Happy Clam, thank you for your advice, though I’m well aware those vertical red boxes are toilets - I’m no fool, sir. I’ve also availed myself just this morning of one of your many fine public bathtubs, as well, though I was a bit self-conscious at first about disrobing in a public square. It turned out well in the end, though, as I was heartily cheered on by the crowd.

Trafalger Square?

Indeed. You saw me on the morning news, then? :wink:

I was trying to talk to SmithWife on my mobile, eating a cheese and ham pancake, when an insane woman approached me proclaimed I miss my family, and commenced to Witness, stuck a paper flower in my lapel, hugged me, kissed me, and begged money for charity (poor children). I gave her £1 and begged her to leave me alone. My wife heard the whole exchange and was… Concerned.

My immediate concern was to make sure my wallet hadn’t been nicked (it wasn’t), but my long-term concern is the future health of my “now-tainted-by-that-kiss” cheek. I want to boil my head in disinfectant.

I was wondering where my mother had got to.

I suppose it depends on what you mean by “masala.” The ordinary definition of “masala” is “spice,” so I’m not sure what it means to say that masala should not be spicy. However, chilis are considered to be a separate category from spices, so I would understand if you were told that “masala should not necessarily be hot.”

It’s raining, so I won’t see the changing of the guard today (I missed it by an hour or so yesterday). I don’t suspect it will rain inside the National Gallery, though. I’ll just get there a couple hours earlier than I intended. :slight_smile:

Last weekend I had five minutes to spare at the National Gallery. If you go in, go up the stairs, and take the first door on the right you go straight into the room with Van Gogh’s Sunflowers, Chair, and some other impressionists. Excellent diversion while my sister was using the toilet.

Just curious. Are indian restaurants rare in the USA?

It depends a lot on where you are. You aren’t likely to find them in small towns in most places, but there should be at least a few in many major cities. There is a whole South Asian neighborhood a couple of miles from my apartment, with dozens of restaurants, grocery stores, sari shops, etc. Especially on the weekends, Indians come from all over the Midwest to stock up on items they can’t get in smaller and more remote places.

(I love grocery shopping in that neighborhood, by the way. Can’t beat the prices, selection, and quality of things like spices, tea, various grains and legumes, etc. Plus it’s like going to India for an hour.)

As Eva Luna says, it depends where you are. Here is a PDF map of the US, shaded by percentage of India-born immigrants in each county. It is clear that the two highest concentrations are in the New York metro area and the San Francisco Bay Area (especially in Silicon Valley, about 50km to the southeast of San Francisco). Note that these are percentages not absolute populations: Chicago and Los Angeles may have more India-born immigrants than the Bay Area, but they’re not as high a percentage. In the Bay Area especially, it’s largely due to the prevalence of India-born engineers. This demographic is generally well-educated, sophisticated, and affluent. Hence, there’s a huge number of Indian restaurants around here, ranging from low-cost “buffet lunch” places to upscale “destination” restaurants. As I mentioned in post #46 above, there are more than 12 Indian restaurants (I think it’s 14, but one may have closed recently) in my Silicon Valley city of 70,000 people. I can easily walk to 10 of these. Around these parts, the word “Indian” invariably refers to people from the South Asian subcontinent.

On the other hand, in most parts of the US, India-born immigrants are much rarer (and most people’s first thought on hearing “Indian” would be “Native American”). I’d be willing to bet – but can’t support with evidence – that the majority of US residents nationwide have never eaten “Indian food” (although as an aside, might that not also be true of residents of France, taken as a whole?). Compare that with Chinese food: even small US towns that have little or no Chinese immigrant populations will have a “Chinese Restaurant” (whether or not it serves anything that bears resemblance to real Chinese food, or is run by anyone with any Chinese ancestry). So, I’d say that most Americans have eaten “Chinese” but a minority have eaten “Indian”.

Apart from the Indian engineers to be found in any high-tech area (Silicon Valley, Silicon Forest, Silicon Prairie, Boston’s Route 128), the other “stereotypical” Indian occupations in the US are family-owned small businesses such as convenience stores (think Apu on The Simpsons) and hotels / motels. These are both business models where hard work and strong family ties can pay off with little risk of the initial investment, and multiple generations can participate. However, the familial nature of both of these business models, stressing meals at home (especially if there’s a store or motel to be looked after during the meal), tends not to support large concentrations of Indian restaurants in the same way that a population of young, single, disposable-income-rich, workaholic Indian engineers does.

The US is a huge country, and different areas have attracted different immigrant groups. Here in Silicon Valley, the local buses and light-rail trains have signs in English, Spanish, and Vietnamese (San Jose has a large Vietnamese population, which might not be obvious at first glance). A few miles from me is Fremont, the city with the largest Afghan population in the US (part of it is known as “Little Kabul”). One block from Little Kabul is the Naz 8 cinema multiplex, specializing in films from “India, Pakistan, Afghanistan, China, Taiwan, Korea and Philippines”.

Pick 100 US residents at random, and you’ll get 100 different experiences with Indian food (compared to the UK, where everyone knows what Chicken Tikka Masala is). I’d still claim that most of the 100 would never have tasted it, or perhaps even laid eyes on an Indian restaurant. Most Americans don’t have a friend or acquaintance from India (although, if you took the Indians out of Silicon Valley, the high-tech machine would wither overnight!). One can drive thousands of miles in the US without finding a curry[sup]*[/sup], whereas “American Chinese” exists in virtually every small town and each suburban mall’s “food court”.

[[sup]*[/sup]My personal “Earthquake Supply” shelf is heavily stockpiled with prepared Indian meals in ready-to-cook pouches: whatever perils the Apocalypse may bring, it’s no excuse to eat bland food! :stuck_out_tongue: ]

Well, it’s been a grand holiday, but it’s time to go home. It looks like I’ll be coming back next month, though, so I’ve got that to look forward to.
Cheers,
Winston