What ridiculously undignified things have you done to amuse your kids?

WhyBaby (18 months old) is having a blast.

(ptooey!)

She’s standing between my legs as I’m reaching over to type on the computer.

(ptooey!)

She’s shoving crinkled up Post-its into my mouth.

(ptooey!)

…which I am shaking around like a dog with a rat and then spitting out with a burst of air and a flying Post-it.

(ptooey!)

And I’ve never heard her giggle so hysterically in my life. I wish I had a webcam for y’all.

(ptooey!)

I dig being a mom.

I drum loudly on my fat hairy belly. For an encore I’ll cup my hand and make popping sounds with my belly button.

I’ve played ‘pony’ and given rides to 8 neices, 5 nephews, and 2 sons.

I’ve let my daughter and her friend give me a makeover. She put nailpolish on my fingers and toes, barrettes in my hair (I’ve got very short hair so that was tough), lipstick and glitter spray. I drew the line at them using eye shadow because I value my eyesight :eek: . I also refused to let them take a picture of me! No evidence is allowed.

One time when we went to Disneyworld I had strep throat but refused to let that spoil my son’s time. I got myself pulled on stage for the Indiana Jones Stunt Show, got a kiss from the Queen of Hearts, danced with Mary Poppins and danced down the mainstreet in the Disney-MGM lot. He was mildly embarrassed (he was 7 at the time) but later admitted how cool it was that I would do that for him.

I will sing and dance with stuffed animals, tell stories in crazy voices, ride little kid’s bikes and generally make a fool of myself just to entertain my kids.

Ooh, I did that once! ONCE! I think it’s even worse with butt-length hair. They just don’t understand hairbrushes at all. And one of them was so proud of the “teeny-tiny braid” she gave me that I had to later pick out with a pin. I swear, she braided like six individual hairs in a microscopic braid.

I love nailpolish though. Even when it’s a mess, it’s fun. Did you ever see that peel-off nail polish? Great for little kids’ efforts.

Pretending to be a gorilla, complete with excellent sound effects. I thought the kids would die laughing the day I took a banana from my son, and in a fit of semi-predictable gorilla pique, threw it on the floor. 'Sploded banana everywhere.

My daughter’s favorite game is to tap me on the nose. I always respond with an angry look and the most high-pitched "Heeeeeeeeeey!" I can muster. Gives the kid giggle conniptions.

I spent Friday morning chasing my son around calling him Daddy and me <his name>. We argued and teased each other for several hours over the weekend about whether he was Daddy or not.

He’s almost 4.

The logic used to refute me was amusing. “You’re wearing the Daddy jacket, so YOU’RE Daddy!”

Eli

I’ve done the same thing with my kids and it’s a blast. My son and daughter switched places with me and my wife for one Saturday. We woke them up early to tell them we were hungry. We then went downstairs to watch TV and “play” and they basically had to wait on us hand and foot. We kept saying we were bored and they should play with us. We whined about the food they served us, wouldn’t eat it and then asked for dessert. We refused to go to bed. We drove them nuts and they sent us to our rooms! Finally at 9 at night we ended the switch. They were so frustrated with us. The next day they actually behaved for a change. Of course, they were back to normal the next week.

I don’t have a kid yet, but I work at a children’s/pregnant woman’s consignment store…

Thus far, probably the most undignified thing I had to do was “take a call” from a toy cellphone handed over to me by my co-worker’s 5 year old nephew. Apparently, this call was from my “dad”, who told me to get to bed on time and be sure to brush my teeth. I was then instructed to hang up. The kid proceeded to hide the cellphone under my ass. He laughed and pointed as it rang and rang and rang. Then vibrated.

Not such a huge deal, right? Except that this all went on in front of two clients and three customers. I just kept smiling, doing my job, answering questions, excused myself to have the conversation, continued answering questions and being friendly as the phone was being “hidden”, and looked thoroughly horrified when the phone vibrated, much to the amusement of all looking on. :smack: When remembering this incident, in my mind, when the phone vibrates, I could swear I made a noise like those chicken on TV make whenever they lay an egg. It was worth it to see the kid laughing.

Kids are okay. They keep me from taking myself too seriously. :cool:

I have a three and a half year old son who lately discovered he is a tiger. A couple of hours ago I said “Goodnight, darling.” He opened his eyes, gave me a tired but serious look, whispered “I’m a tiger.” I said: “Alright, goodnight, tiger”, and he said “Goodnight” and actually fell asleep immediately.

Anyhow, what tigers do is to scare people (which he frequently does at kindergarten nowadays), and so – here it comes – lately I’ve been a fox (!) running around on all four, scared senseless by a screaming, giggling tiger.

When my daughter was about 8 years old, I took her to see a show with her girl scout troup. The guy up on stage is doing comedy routines mixed with a bit of magic tricks. The audience is pretty much all girl scouts and their moms, with a couple of dads there (like me). At some point, the guy says he needs an assistant. This is a girl scout event, so I’m certain that he is going to grab one of the girls up front and put her on stage. I’m thinking its kinda sad my daughter doesn’t have a chance to end up on stage because we’re way in the back of the theater. But, then the guy starts going up and down the aisles. When he comes over our way, he takes one look at me and grabs my arm and hauls me up on stage. I’m thinking, what the heck? Why do you want my ugly butt up on stage? But shortly after that, I figured it out. He had a special “costume” for me to wear.

So picture this. About 30 seconds later, there I am, a big old fat ugly bald guy, standing on stage, with my daughter in the audience, and I’m wearing a tutu. Yep. A tutu. And I’ve got my arms raised over my head like a pretty ballerina. And, much to the audience’s delight, my humiliation on stage continues for another good ten minutes at least.

If that doesn’t fit the definition of undignified, I don’t know what does.

I couldn’t see my daughter from up on stage, but the moms in the troup later told me that the look on my daughter’s face was priceless. Just before letting me off stage, the guy thanked me for having a sense of humor. Apparently he tried the same stunt in an earlier show and the guy was not amused and he had to cut the act early.

I would have to say that “undignified” is pretty much the norm around here. My priggish English grandmother must be rolling in her grave right now.

The worst: when my daughter was about 9, I recited the entire Cheech & Chong Chebornek skit while we were out for a walk, substituting the word “poop” for “s***”.

I’m not proud of it, but on the other hand she couldn’t stop laughing.

Aaaaaaaaaaawwww, you guys! :smiley:

I am not a parent, but I have done various silly things for the amusement of cousins.

I do all sorts of goofy stuff with kids. I totally lose my inhibitions in the quest to make 'em laugh.

Even in public, I’ll wiggle my butt, act like a lion, tell strangers that the kid I’m with is named Dinosaur Spike Tractor and certainly not Charlie, wear silly hats or the hairstyle that they gave me…
The most undignified, though, would have to be when I was playing doggie with a pair of precocious little girls.

They put a bowl of water on the floor and I, on my hands and knees, lapped water from the bowl. It was clean, but still- in any other context, that would have been unbearably humiliating and degrading. But it was okay because I was making them laugh!

At once?

Pull my finger

:smiley:

I’m not sure how to put this to type but I used to have “Voice cracking” contests with both my sons when they were younger. Whoever could do it the longest won.

In case you don’t know what I’m talking about; It’s where you take a deep breathe and make your voice box do a series of long drawn out “clicks.”

(Hope that’s descriptive enough)