What’s the definition of agony?
A one-armed man hanging from a cliff with itchy balls.
That’s a bad joke, but I kind of like it.
Watch it there! My grandfather died at Auschwitz
He fell out of a guard tower.
Did you hear the news about the 2010 Haiti Earthquake?
Damages were estimated at $48
What’s the hardest part about learning to rollerblade?
Telling your parents that you’re gay.
With remarkable timing, we have a late entry for this contest. Apologies to US/global Dopers if this is old news.
In another report Baker excused himself thus:
Doesn’t make it any more funny, or any less crass and insensitive.
j
“I identify as an attack helicopter” and all its runty little bastard offspring.
This has less to do with the joke being inherently unfunny (although, let’s be clear, I have yet to hear a formulation of the joke that actually qualifies as “humor”, even when South Park did it) and more to do with repetition. Specifically it is one of the exactly two go-to phrases about trans people that most people know, and you hear it fucking constantly. It wasn’t particularly funny 5 years ago on 4chan, and the ten thousandth fucking repetition has not made it funnier.
That’s a real meme? If I heard someone say that, I would have assumed they were a fellow Skin Horse fan (in which someone’s identity as an attack helicopter is a plot point, because he is a brain-in-a-jar cyborg attack helicopter).
Bernard Manning that one - old school gagmeister from the UK.
Danny Baker’s tweet this week that just got him sacked from the BBC is a contender for worst joke I can recall seeing - report here
Completely unfunny and mediocre in the context he intended, as funny as anal cancer in the context it was actually taken, and a cretinous misunderstanding of media from someone who’s been in that game for 40 years.
I don’t know if this qualifies as a joke, but I think I’ll remember it forever. I had a friend who said they had a great joke for me, and they said, “repeat after me and you’ll get it”. They said some inconsequential sentence, and I couldn’t figure out any wordplay about that made any joke-sense or would make me look dumb, so I just repeated it. They laughed at me, and said, “no, you didn’t get it.”. Rinse, lather, repeat 5 times. I’d repeat the words they said and they’d laugh louder at me every time. Right when I was starting to get actually mad at being laughed at over something I didn’t get, they told me. I wasn’t doing the arm movements that they repeated every time they said the words. The setup for the “joke” was that I was supposed to mimic their every movement as well as their speech. And the “joke” was that you weren’t supposed to take notice of their arm movements, therefore not repeating them, and so become the butt of the joke.
I still seethe thinking about it to this day, because it isn’t even attempting to be funny and only aims to mock somebody else for being “stupid”.
If you haven’t seen The OA yet, you might want to consider this post a trigger warning.
I saw this as someone’s forum sig yesterday.
What do you say when there are nuts on the wall?
Walnuts.
What do you say when there are nuts on your chest?
Chestnuts.
What do you say when there are nuts on your chin?
You can’t say anything because my cock is in your mouth.
Recently: I had an accident at home and had a pretty nasty bump and bruise. My doctor made a “joke” about my husband HITTING ME !!! I told him, that’s not at all funny; someone could overhear it and think my husband really IS abusing me and could get him into a lot of trouble. “Don’t EVER say anything like that again.”
Can you image-- someone who’s supposed to be smart saying such a thing? I still get steamed just thinking of it.
I don’t get it.
Lucy, you got some ‘splainin’ to do.
“House” is a synonym for family. A bay window projects outward. In other words, George’s gut sticks out.
How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? Answer: None
I heard it here first, and since then one asshole or another has come back to tell it again around Paddy’s day every year. F that joke and every asshole who tells it.
The I’d guess you don’t like this one:
What’s the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish wake?
One less drunken Irishman!
I recently read one on Twitter that was pretty bad…
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