I had a chance to be a tenured professor at an excellent university but left prematurely because of lack of confidence in my own ability and because I was intimidated by the Chairperson. I ended up in a less prestigious university, but am still pretty happy.
I think I just screwed up a promotion by not interviewing as well as I might have. I was irritable and showed it. Oops! (This could cost $15,000+ a year.)
I had a chance to be a very very very good competitive swimmer. My highschool coach said that I was one of the best he’d seen. Our pool was not official though, and the official timing was at a pool across town (about a 20 minute drive). My mom didn’t want to drive that far (it was a town called Gates-Chili which she felt was ‘squirrely’) and I was never officially timed. So, even though I could beat everyone else on the team at 100 m freestyle, I couldn’t compete at states.
I was offered a 100% free ride at a state college far from home. Instead I chose a pricey local private school which I basically ended up flunking out of, costing my parents a mint and getting little or nothing in return.
If I was just going to flunk out, it would have been a lot cheaper to do it for free.
Got a scholarship for college – would have been a damn near free ride, but the school was in Virginia, and I lived in Illinois. My parents refused to let me go, saying that since I was under 18, I was still under their control.
I accepted that, went to a state school, quit that after 2.5 years and getting majorly burned out studying things I wasn’t interested in (and not that talented at to boot), and it took me another 7 years to get the courage up to go back to school on my own.
I am doing well now, and it looks like I will have a 4.0 or damn close this semester.
One of my favorite Yogi Bear cartoons features Yogi and BooBoo trying to hibernate (in a queen-sized bed in their cave) when someone starts banging on their door, loudly. BooBoo whines, “Who could that be, Yogi??” And Yogi replies
"I dunno, BooBoo, but it can't be opportunity, 'cause it only knocks ONCE."
On a more flippant and shallow note. I was invited to a party on Rammstein’s tour bus in 1999. And for about three minutes I was alone in a room with Till Lindemann, the dream man of my life. The man that changed my attitude, the number one lust object in the history of the world. Although I talk a big game, I had no intention of doing anything with him but I had four thousand questions for him: Does you daughter like your music? What was life like in Berlin in the eighties? Is your favorite band REALLY Duran Duran? Blah blah blah…
I went totally starstruck…COMPLETELY. My face went red, I stumbled on my words and I said:
“I heard you dislocated your knee. Does it hurt?”
He looked at me, waved his hand in my face and said “Don’t talk about that at a party”
and walked away.
sigh. A better opening line and we may have had a real conversation…
I got accepted to our highly-competitive Junior year abroad program in England when I was in college. I decided not to go. My parents were pretty pissed, I think.
The girl I was in love with for years was interested in me, when I was single and fancy free, and I elected not to become involved with her. Trust me, it was the right thing to do… I know that… but I cannot express how much it stings and how I really wish I could have pursued it.
Well, when I was a sophomore in high school, I met this cute girl, my friend’s younger sister. She asked me to a dance, and I went. However, I was an awkward youth, and didn’t pursue it. We became close friends, but I didn’t think she wanted any more than that, so we just dated other people. Fast forward to my freshman year of college. She all of a sudden confesses her love for me, and you’d think, “Wow, what a lucky break!” However, being me, I freaked out, and said I didn’t really want a relationship, and made up some excuse about distance or something. I did get to make out with her a couple of times when I was home, but never told her my real feelings until after she started dating some other guy. Now everything feels like an awkward mess. The lesson here is twofold- take your damn opportunities when you can, and also- if you’re gonna confess your feelings to someone, don’t wait three years and then blurt out “I’m in love with you.”
I didn’t get laid the night of my senior prom. This beautiful girl was head-over-heels for me (don’t ask why – I have no idea), but I was very unsure of what level of physical intimacy she would be comfortable with – when she’d been with her previous boyfriend she’d made a big deal over how she wasn’t interested in a sexual relationship until she was older. Due to the awkwardness this caused, I ignored several very clear signals (Skewbald would have told me I was being oblivious!) and never made a move. We fell out of touch a little, and then she unexpectedly moved away (broken home syndrome). Of course, I then found out from the ex that they’d been doing it the whole time they’d been together and she just pretended her hesitancy so people wouldn’t think she was easy.
I gave a lousy interview at a very prestigious motion picture special effects company located in northern California.
I was a pretty talented distance runner in jr. high and high school but I couldn’t deal with the pressure & I hated the training, so I slacked off my senior year and didn’t compete in college. Now my knees are screwed up and I couldn’t compete if I wanted to. (I’m probably too old as well.)
I never approached the ONE boy I liked all through jr. high & high school and asked him out. Then he asked out my best friend… (We don’t make that mistake anymore. Nowadays, when we see something we like, we go get it.)
I never met my great-grandmother who lived to be 101. She died when I was in jr. high.
If I had more confidence in my writing ability, I could have lived with my mother out of college and worked seriously on a novel. That was 20 years ago, and in that time, I’ve written two novels and am working on a third, but it’s been a much harder grind.
Of course, if I had been more astute, when I was working at a computer game company in the mid-80s, I could have invested in that start-up company, but I thought Microsoft had crappy software and wouldn’t go anywhere. To compensate, as soon as my mother died, I took part of my inheiritance and invested it in tech stocks, just as the bubble burst.
The only thing good about not winning the love of my life was that I would not have found my wife, who loves me and has given me some pretty fantastic children, and who I love very much. That makes up a lot for the other stuff.