Monkey Butlers.
Desktop sized mousepads.
Oh yeah, and round sneakers with velcro like they make for kids but in my size!
What the hell are you talking about? It’s CHRISTINA AGUILERA. She’s got both righteous pipes and amazing pins. She deserves only worship and love, not being eaten alive by cloned dinosaurs.
Just for that, I’m erasing her name from the wheel and putting yours on TWICE.
Unfortunately I cannot recall the Procompsognathi who were sent after her automatically when her name came up on WOV earlier. Can’t argue with the wheel.
Yeah… I always see this in Drs. Foster & Smith and wonder how exactly you’re supposed to get your cat into that. And then how you keep them from rolling away. My cat would NOT lie there like the cat in the picture.
The above isn’t really what you’re looking for featherlou, but it’s on the right track. (It just leaves the other paw and the teeth out and able to attack.)
Natural style peanut butter sold in oversized (not full) jars, so that the nutcrete on the bottom can be stirred in without overflowing the oil on the top onto the counter.
I’d make the monkey butler do it.
taxi, that is very close to what I had envisioned (but you need the head covered, too. Don’t these people know cats have teeth?). And it’s a carrier, too? What do you do, put all four legs through the holes and pick the cat up like a gym bag?
Remote control for the traffic lights …
How 'bout a hand crank charger?
My grandfather the mad scientist used to make me spotted paint to play with. I think he just mixed oil and latex and told me to paint fast, but I’m not sure. Back in the days when dinosaurs roamed the earth, he supposedly made and patented a paint that would come out of the can striped, but I’ve not seen the patent (it might not have been in his name, but in his employers).
Me, I’m waiting for a family restaurant that has toddler sized silverware, bibs, sippy cups and straws that are short enough for a small person to use in a high chair - I hate having to carry all the baby gear and and scissors to snip straws in my purse. Offering finger food for baby appetizers (Fruity Puffs, Cheerios, Goldfish crackers) would be a bonus.
I want mid-sized plastic hangers. Most of my kid’s T-shirts fall off the kid-size hangers, but are too small for the regular ones. Pain in my ass.
Another thing that would make me very happy is a website on which I can check the progress of local retailers who are remodelling. It makes my brain itch bad to shop in a place where things are in a state of flux.
My current cell phone (Treo 700p) will play mp3s and does many other marvelous things, but I would really like an mp3 player that has not only an FM but also an AM tuner. I don’t need a huge memory and the device should be very compact. No such animal.
A step down the road, I want my phone to do all that, have GPS, AND be my car and front door key as well as electronic wallet, and secure ID. This is the holy grail. One device that would eliminate your wallet, mp3 player, keys, etc. One device to rule them all!
I would like to buy unwaxed dental floss in my local store, instead of through mail-order.
I want an inexpensive toilet snake with a collar where the thumbscrew that secures the snake isn’t made out of plastic so it cracks and breaks the first time you try to use it. All the ones at Home Depot, OSH, and Lowes are the crappy plastic kind. They are selling you something that will break before it ever does you any good. Sometimes when I am in the plumbing aisle I will go up to one, twist the thumbscrew just to hear it crack. It doesn’t take much force at all.
In fact, I want all my products made the way they used to be. Now they are DESIGNED to break. Ever try to buy a doorstop lately? They used to be made of solid hard rubber and would last a lifetime. Now they are made of hollow plastic, and don’t even last a few WEEKS before they smush and crack. It must be great business for the doorstop makers, but I have stopped buying them. What’s the point? A wad of paper jammed under the door lasts longer and costs nothing.
Same thing with bathrobes. Do they intentionally make the belt loops so they are literally hanging by a thread when you buy them? I get about two months out of a bathrobe if I am very gentle and careful with the loops (even expensive department store ones) before one of the belt loops tears off. I used to have bathrobes that lasted for years. Now you can’t find a decent one.
I would like to buy a new car with a standard opening for the stereo in the dash. Try and buy one! All the cars today have custom car radios molded into the dash. When that radio goes bad, you will be basically SOL, because if the manufacturer even has a replacement (doubtful) it will cost an arm and a leg compared to an aftermarket Pioneer or Sony, and not be nearly as good.
I would like to buy some spark plug wires that can be pulled off the spark plug without the plug end contact tearing away from the wire to remain on the plug, leaving the wire useless. They have figured out a way to make you buy wires every time you change your plugs! It’s genius, Manny! We’ll make a fortune!
While there are many new wonders for us to choose from, in many ways we are going backward. In short, what I would mainly like, is to be able to buy products that are made as well as they were only 30 years ago. Things today intentionally engineered to break so you buy them over and over again. The list is long, but I mentioned a few that are on the top of my mind lately.
To top it off, I want decent service when I am buying products. Several times a week I find myself saying to store clerk “You don’t know what good service is, you are too young to have ever seen it.” Proper bagging in a grocery store is a prime example of this. Since no-one knows how to do it anymore, it has effectively been erased from our institutional memory. It will never be seen again.
Now get off my lawn!
Since I bag my own groceries, I’ve learned how to properly bag, especially since I went for years without a car and had to fit everything in the fewest bags possible. Heavy stuff in the bottom, fitting stuff to build up the sides, frozen and refrigerated stuff stays together, planning what goes where for maximum packing, etc. My wife complains that I pack the bags so densely she can’t lift them easily.
You mean, like a 1920’s style death ray?
I’d love to get those candies again, the ones that look kind of like little snowballs or something…
A little research reveals that these were sometimes called “cream filberts”, “crystallized cream filberts” or “mothballs”
MMMmmmmmmm…
They make a silicone lubricant that you can coat the white part of the plug with, and it lets the rubber boot slide off easily. It’s about a dollar a pack at AutoZone, and a little goes a long way. One pack was enough to do both Hubby’s and my car, with some left over.
Monstro, Tashabot, Argent Towers, don’t get your hopes up. Individuals and companies in the recording industry spend millions annually developing hardware and software sound processors of all sorts, and professionals in this field will quickly tell you this is not possible. Human voices have a very complex frequency spectrum compared to most instruments, nevermind the fact that each voice is different too, and if you do really want to block out all the vocals - well, that is possible, but you would be blocking out half the music as well.
The *only *way to do a good job of removing a vocal from the mix is to have a copy of the original multi-track mix with the vocal confined to one track, and then obviously mute that track.
A spray bottle. I’d spend upwards of $20 for a spray bottle that well, sprays. What the whole “truth in labeling” people haven’t figured out is that if you sell something and call it a spray bottle and all it actually does is hold water and piss you off, then it isn’t actually a spray bottle.
I hate buying things for a purpose, not being able to tell if it will actually perform the duty specified only to find out that it was a complete waste of money. (Like the dishwasher that was in our house when we bought it. It actually made dishes dirtier.)
I’ve changed my mind, I’d pay $50 for a spray bottle that wouldn’t break after the first 3 spritzes. I’ve even considered buying one of those pressure pumpy sprayer things for insecticide but use it for windex and 409-y type things. I have a toddler, it’s not like I couldn’t use it.
damned hamsters
They make a wrist watch like that. We’ve discussed it here, but I wouldn’t know where to start looking to find the link.
I want a complete line of baby gear that can be operated with one hand. A highchair, stroller, carseat, etc. Every feature on it should be able to be done with a single hand very easily.
My life will be complete when the secrets to the Jet Pack are released by M5.
I know the stroller and carseat already exist - Graco makes them, for one. The stroller that collapses and uncollapses with the press of one red button is especially nice.