Hypothetical: What would you do for one million dollars, tax free?
- There are three judges- Me, Myself and I.
- Whatever you propose to do, It has to be legal.
- It cannot involve marmosets in any way, shape or form.
Write a hundred page essay on why you rock.
I saw an episode of Dirty Jobs the other day where Mike Rowe had to help renovate a manhole. I’m pretty sure the guy who did the regular job said he got paid a million. They had to go down the hole (full of roaches), scoop out used TP, needles, etc., pressure wash the walls (hot and moist), then paint all with a protective coating. It was horrendous. One of Mike’s cameramen puked on his head.
But if I had to do it one single time…I’d consider it.
I’ve been vegetarian most of my life, but I would eat meat for a million.
I know you’re supposed to say you would never let your pets go, not for all the money in the world, but I would sell any one of them for a million dollars as long as they were going to a nice and loving home.
I would appear on reality TV, but only if I were actually guaranteed a million dollars. Not for a one-in-twelve chance or whatever.
I read that as what would you do with One Million Dollars. I can’t think of anything I’d be willing to do for a million dollars that anyone would think was worth a million. I’ll try to think of something.
Oh, the manhole (short of maintenance hole) story made me remember something. The old inspectors used to say that if your project ever removes a storm drain maintenance hole or drain inlet, be sure to check out the bottom of it. Stockton was a departure point for the hills during the gold rush and they said that you can sometimes find really old coins.
Which made me thing of the Norris, Greg & Norris 1849 half eagle. They were made of California gold before California became a state and didn’t have any government backing. Therefore, after California became a state, most of them were melted down for US coinage, making the remaining ones rare. Most of the remaining NG&Ns have “San Francisco” on the reverse, but one has “Stockton” instead. I’ve seen quotes that the unique Stockton coin is worth $5 million.
Maybe you’d like to sponsor the search for a second Stockton half eagle?
Attend a Trump rally…but I want cash; no NFTs!
I might vote for Trump for a million$$.*
But I ain’t going to no rally.
*I’m in a red state.
- Dumping a bunch of my posts into an AI program just to point out the obvious does not impress me.
- Only 100 pages??
Well, if I could get away with it. You didnt say it had to be something unpleasant or difficult.
Nope, it just has to impress me in some way more than every other entry. 
Well, I could come up with a better one if I could use a marmoset.
Binge watch the entire series of the Kardashians. With appropriate sleep breaks.
This topic made me think of The Book of Questions (misremembered title?), from the '80s. I think I recall one of them being something like, ‘Would you perform oral sex on someone (male) on live TV for a million dollars, provided you’re allowed to wear a mask?’
That one I’d consider, but there was another about eating a bowl of live cockroaches that 10 million wouldn’t get me to do.
On the old Mark and Brian radio show they had a contest of this sort, and the prize was playoff tickets to some sporting event. Everyone thought the guy who dropped his drawers and had his buddy throw darts at his ass until 10 of them stuck was a sure thing…until the next guy used a straight razor to shave every bit of hair off his body and then jumped into a pool of rubbing alcohol.
Hmm, i wouldn’t give oral sex to a stranger on live TV, but I think i would eat a bowl of cockroaches for a million dollars.
I wonder how nasty they taste.
Probably better than a blow job, is my guess.
For a million dollars I would visit Beck and watch her vote for Trump.
For me it would depend on the stranger.
Random homeless person living under a bridge? Nope, nope nope.
Penelope Cruz…sure.
I’d just agree to kick back 50% to the judge(s). Of course, I shouldn’t say that part out loud.
I have two responses; one from Cuba Gooding, and if that gets a satisfactory response, one from Marlon Brando.
(Too much trouble to figure out how to post images):
“SHOW ME THE MONEY!”
and
“Whaddya got?”
I’d answer the phone. Simple as that.
I only answer my phone if I recognize the number/name on my caller display. If I don’t recognize the number, and it’s not an 800 number, it just might be Publisher’s Clearing House telling me that I won a million dollars. So I’ll answer it.
Easy as that.