My friend who lives down the street had a party on Saturday, and myself and a couple other friends decided to check it out. It was pretty much a run-of-the-mill party, with about 10 people hanging out on the porch and some more inside. I was there for about an hour and intermingled around the house, and went to the bathroom a couple of times.
When I left, I realized I didn’t have my cell phone. I knew that I had brought it with me because I had made a phone call while I was there. I didn’t feel like looking for it so I told my friend to tell me if she found it, since we work together.
Fast forward to yesterday. I ask her if she found my phone and she said that they looked everywhere and didn’t find it, but their downstairs toilet was completely clogged.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen. I dropped my own cell phone in the toilet and managed to flush it down. It’s still in the tiolet, waiting to be liberated. My friend told me she was going to bring it to me at work in a plastic bag when they get it out.
That’s the second phone I’ve lost to the toilet. I have no idea how I not only failed to notice that it fell out of my back pocket and into the toilet, but actually FLUSHED IT DOWN. Please, make me feel batter and let me know of the stupidest thing you’ve done lately.
About a week ago I ordered a pizza. About an hour later, I’m beginning to wonder. I get a vague sense of impending doom… oh, no, I didn’t… did I?
I hadn’t ordered pizza for several weeks, but I always order it online. Last time I ordered, I was at my ex-husband’s, and I must have not changed the destination back to home. Just after realizing what must be going on, good ol’ ex calls- “Did you order a pizza?”
raz, don’t feel too bad. I have a girlfriend who has done the same thing (minus the flushing) three times in the same year. The first two times were into a pee-filled toilet and the third was into a freshly flushed toilet, but it was in the dorms so the cringe-factor was still there. At least it was her own urine, right?
Her phone was fine after it was dried out. She used something anti-bacterial on the outside for her ease of mind. After the third time, she just got a new phone–which stopped working after about two months.
Here’s one for you. Thank og there were no witnesses.
I was driving to work and had stopped at a stoplight. For a moment, I was afraid that the key to my workplace had been left at home, so I began searching through my purse to make sure I had it. And I searched…and began to panic! Where are my keys? Only a mild brainfart of course, because clearly my keys are in the friggin’ ignition where they belong!
This was so embarrassing even though I was alone. If anyone else had been in the car I would have blurted out my stupidity for all to hear. I hate Mondays.
not so recent, but mind numbingly dumb (literally);
I was late for work one day and was rushing around the house. Just before leaving, I opened the closet door, reached in and grabbed my coat. I then closed the closet door.
On my head.
I still have the scar to remind me anytime I get to thinkin’ how smart I am.
I stumbled into the shower one bleary morning at 5:00 am. Big meeting that morning so needed to look my very freshest.
I commenced to wash hair, soap and rinse, grab the pink daisy razor, put the shaving gel on, shave legs, wash off, get out and dry off. Hurriedly I dried my hair, got dressed and as I was putting on my stockings realized…
I didn’t do a very good job of shaving, did I? It felt like I hadn’t shaved at all.
I don’t have to shave the legs very often; my hair doesn’t grow very much at all, so I only need to shave every couple of weeks or so. But the girls needed a good trimming by that point.
Went back to the shower, peered at the razor and - well, I hadn’t taken the plastic cap off the blade when I shaved. :o
I wear contact lenses. Everything’s a big giant blur without them. I showered without my lenses in. Does that get me excused?
My friend got a flat tire in our apartment complex a few days ago, and the lugnuts were stripped, making it nearly impossible for us to change the tire ourselves. So last night we decided that we would plug the hole, then have AAA come fill it (we didn’t want them to change it because we assumed a tire from them would cost a fortune). So AAA told us it would take 90 minutes, so we hopped in my truck to run up to the auto parts store to get the plug kit. At the store I proceeded to hop out quickly, roll up my window, lock and close the door-- with the keys in it and the car running! :smack: Then I realized, well I can’t very well call AAA, they’re already on their way to my apartment.
Luckily, a guy that worked in the store was able to take a slim jim and get the truck open.
To top it off, a couple days ago I was just bragging about how long it had been since I had locked my keys in my car.
About a month ago, it was still just cool enough to have the heat on some evenings. When I have the heat on, I keep the door to my bedroom closed so I don’t warm up space I’m not using.
Well, one night, I decided it was time to go to bed. My routine is that I turn off the heat and the lights in the living and dining rooms, then I toddle off down the hall to the bathroom by light of the front walkway filtering in through my bedroom and front door windows.
So, this night I did the usual getting-ready-for-bed bathroom things and then I toddled back up hall to where my bedroom is. Just as I turned to go in, I noticed it was awful dark in there. Suddenly, my whole front side collided with something solid. THUMP! The door! Normally, I push it open on my way to the bathroom! :smack:
Sometimes, it’s good to live alone. There was no one to see my embarrassment or laugh at me.
Just last night. We decided that the CD player was too low in the entertainment center so I got all the components out and played musicial gear for a while, got them all wired back together. But the CD player wouldn’t open. It’s one of those old style carousel players that holds 5 CDs and there were 3 in there which I had failed to remove prior. Now they were stuck inside having gotten out of their little spaces and were rolling around inside the CD player. I broke the thing by turning it over and trying to shake them out. (actually got two of them out but the third was really stuck)
That CD player is in the trash now.
This happened on the same day that I realized that the reason that one of my speaker wasn’t working (for the past 6 months) was that I’d crossed the speaker wires.
Last night I had some cooking juices left over from broiling summer sausage, and I thought it would be a nice treat to pour over my dogs’ food. I grabbed a coffee can of dog food in one arm, and the cast iron skillet of juices in the other. I’m steadily thinking: dontdropit dontdropit dontdropit. I’m concentrating so hard on keeping my grip on the skillet that I whack my elbow on the door jamb.
:smack:
Yep. I suddenly had a very juicy and slick laundry room. Yeesh.
Very minor but still one of those whack-yerself-in-the-coconut moments . . .
I have C-thru ruler like this for measuring things on graphs.
I needed to measure something from a graph. So I flopped down the ruler on said graph. But the numbers were kinda hard to read. So I rotated it 180 degrees clockwise. Huh. Numbers still hard to read. I rotated it clockwise again. Still couldn’t read the numbers. Then I rotated it clockwise again.
Somewhere in the dim recesses of my overtaxed brain, a lone synapse bravely sparked.
Along similar lines to the OP, I was finishing up at a urinal in a public restroom when I turned to go and my keys flew out of my hoodie pocket and plunked right into the pee-filled urinal. At that very moment, a friend of mine happened to enter the restroom and saw what happened, and we just stared at each other increduously. Then the moton-sensor, automatic flusher went off, and my keys began being pulled into the urinal drain, so I quickly shoved my hand in and barely snagged the keychain with 2 fingers. At that point, another friend of ours entered to see me with my hand in the flushing urinal and me and the first friend laughing hysterically. I got the keys out and washed them thoroughly, but I don’t think my mini-hackey sack keychain will ever be the same.
I stood in the lobby outside our office the other day waiting for the elevator. It seemed to be taking forever! Just when I was getting a bit huffy, I realized that I’d never pushed the button to call it. :smack:
I’m currently working in a warehouse for a lip balm company. My job is to inventory all the bins in the warehouse, and since lots of them are high up, I have to climb up these moveable stairs. So the other day, as I was rolling the stairs to a new location, I decided to ride them. I built up some speed and hopped on.
Here’s the thing, though. The locking mechanism for the wheels is activated by the bottom step of the stairs…the step I was on. :smack:
The stairs stopped moving, yet I did not…at least not for a couple seconds until my face smacked into the stairs.
We were eating corn on the cob, cooked by wrapping an ear of corn in Saran Wrap and placing it in the microwave. I put it in for 90 or 95 seconds, then remove it. Well, my dad put the last ear in, and pushe 100 seconds.
There’s just one minor problem, the microwave interprets 1:00 as 1 minute, 0 seconds, not as in 1 second more than 99 seconds.
Dad wanted to know why I didn’t say I put it in for a minute and a half, well, cause the microwave understands 90 seconds as the same as 1:30.
Mom shakes her head and says “we’ve had this discussion before”.
