What's the funniest song you've ever heard?

Cafe Society
81

Tesco Vee’s (singer for the legendary punk band The Meatmen) version of the Smiths “How Soon Is Now”. If you don’t know who Tesco Vee is, well, lets just say he’s the person least likely to be mistaken for Morrisey. Other than it being heavy, its a pretty straightforward cover, but the fact that Tesco’s singing it just breaks my funnybone. On a related note, Mojo Nixon does a very funny version of “Girlfriend In A Coma”.

If we’re talking just novelty songs then Bill Cosbys Barry White parody “Yes Yes Yes” is the funniest song I’ve ever heard.

Jon

82

“They’re Coming To Take Me away, Ha-haa!” by Napoleon XIV is a classic one from 1966.

83

You’re thinking of “The Mayor of Bayswater”, jjimm. I thought that there might be variant titles (my rugby-playing days are long past), but Google gives 108 hits for Mayor vs 0 hits for Earl.

Also in the same vein is The Engineer’s Song (“An engineer told me before he died…”).

To me, both are more filthy than funny, but YMMV.

84

Ah well, “Earl” is how I was taught - since it was an aural tradition before being codified on the interweb thingy I shall carry on singing “Earl”. I must just have learned a rarer version. :wink: And MMV - for me the humour is just how unbelievable filthy it is.

85

The Banana Song
That is where you take the name and twist it.

Tom Tom Bo Bom Banana fana fo fom fe fi fo fom Tom

86

Seconding Kip Adada’s “Wet Dream in the Gulf Stream.” I laughed out loud the first time I heard it.

I haven’t seen “Star Trekkin’” mentioned. It also got some playtime on Dr. Demento’s show.

*Star Trekkin’
Across the universe
Always going forward
'Cause we can’t find reverse.

There’s Klingons off the starboard bow
Starboard bow
Starboard bow
There’s Klingons off the starboard bow
Starboard bow, Jim.

We come in peace [sub]Shoot to kill, shoot to kill …[/sub]*

Good stuff.

87

Actually, it’s called The Name Game .

88

John Prine has a couple of good ones:

Dear Abby

*Dear Abby, Dear Abby, my feet are too long
My hair’s fallin’ out and my rights are all wrong
My friends they all tell me are no friends at all
Won’t you write me a letter, won’t you give me a call
Signed, Bewildered

Chorus:
Bewildered, Bewildered, you have no complaint
You are what you are and you ain’t what you ain’t
So listen up buster and listen up good
Stop wishin’ for bad luck and knockin’ on wood
Dear Abby, Dear Abby my fountain pen leaks
My wife hollers at me and my kids are all freaks
Every side I get up on is the wrong side of bed
If it weren’t so expensive, I’d wish I were dead
Signed, Unhappy
Chorus:
Unhappy, Unhappy…
*

Etc…

Then there’s Beer Run by Todd Snider:

B double E double R UN, BEER RUN…

But maybe my favorite is “You don’t even call me by my name”, by Steve Goodman and John Prine. It’s a song that has everything that’s ever been in a country song, all wrapped up into one. The first two verses are fairly standard, then the monologue goes,

“Well, we missed a lot of stuff in the first two verses. God, Mother, prisons, farms, trucks, trains, getting drunk, big holidays like Christmas, and dead dogs like Old Shep. And with all due respect, you can’t have a good country song without God, mother, prison, farms, trucks, trains, Christmas, and dead dogs. So here’s the last verse:”

*Well since the dog got drunk and died,
And Momma went to prison,
Nothing 'round this farm has been the same.
And God, you know, when mom broke out last Christmas,
She drove a getaway laundry truck right into a train.

<chorus>
And I’m gonna hang around, as long as you will let me,
And I didn’t mind it, standing in the rain,
You don’t have to call me darlin’, darlin’.
But you never even called me by my name.
*

Great song.

89

I remembered another one… " Get Drunk With Dignity " (I’m not sure if there is more than one song called that)

It has some great lines…

“If a bar has human ears nailed to the wall, don’t pass out there”

90

Is everyone burned out on ‘United States of Whatever’ already? I’m still amused by that song.

The various episodes of Mr. Show which contain songs always kill me. ‘Ewww, Girl, Ewww’ by Three Times One Minus One. Those evil, evil parodies of Eric Clapton and Brian Wilson (‘A Mouth Full of Sores’).

The D, always.

David Brent’s horrendous turns on his guitar in The Office.

91

I am not familiar with this particular version … not really Buffett’s thing, y’ask me. Asshole is Denis Leary, all the way. Buffett’s Fruitcakes is pretty funny, tho.

Anybody else know who Stephen Lynch is? Funny and genius. My personal fave is Lullaby (Divorce Song).

92

“Boobs” by Ruth Wallis.

93

Let’s try Chuck! …no…wait… Let’s try Bart! …no …wait… never mind!

94

A couple that I can’t believe haven’t been mentioned so far …

“Alice’s Restaurant” and the “Motorcycle Song”, by Arlo Guthrie.

Also, “Motorpsycho Nitemare,” by Bob Dylan (circa 1964), of all people – a really cool story song that plays off the old farmer’s daughter joke with the movie “Psycho.”

95

I’ve heard this as “You Don’t Have to Call Me Darlin’, Darlin” by David Allen Coe (who also sings the ridiculously filthy “I’d Like to Fuck The Shit Out Of You” and “Whips and Things.”). He mentions Steve Goodman, and the last verse of his version goes:

I was drunk the day my momma got out of prison
And I went to pick her up in the rain
But before I could get to the station in my pick-up truck
She got run over by a damned ol’ train

I really like “Title of the Song” by Da Vinci’s Notebook, “The Commercial” by King Missile, “Tribute” by Tenacious D, and Hayseed Dixie’s cover of “Big Balls” (which must be heard to be believed).

I think that’s “Now You’re a Man” by DVDA, as referenced by incubus on the previous page. :smiley:

96

David Allen Coe definitely recorded the most popular version of the song. It was written by Goodman and John Prine. I have Steve Goodman’s live version, and I think it’s way better than Coe’s. The lyrics I posted are from the live version.

When he does the monologue about what a country song needs, he says, “Getting Drunk thanks to Coe.” I guess Coe earned them some money.