It’s not floridly entertaining like belief in shape-shifting lizards. But for my money, the most batshit insane (and quite widespread) conspiracy theory involves the entire medical establishment/health care industry suppressing cheap, safe, 100% effective natural cures for cancer and serious chronic diseases.
Millions of health care workers around the world, all of them susceptible or actually suffering from these diseases, with loved ones and friends similarly susceptible or afflicted, but the massive conspiracy/coverup of alternative cures continues because Filthy Pharma Lucre is just too good to pass up, even if you’re dead.
The people who believe this tend to be the same ones who don’t believe in vaccines, and advocate hemp oil as a cure-all for everything. Hemp oil does have its uses, but folks, it’s not that simple.
Well clearly that’s the Illuminati sending a coded message about how the gays are going to cause the downfall of the USA. It’s kind of obvious when you think about it.
That any govt hides alien crafts/bodies.
Illuminati
Alien bases on the moon and the fake NASA photo’s that they blurred out…etc.
Nasa has a warp drive
CIA has a heart attack gun capable of causing someone a heart attack…possible perhaps I guess.
There is one theory that I believe to be true…that the American govt is completely paranoid with irrational fears.
Yeah, that one is ludicrous… Just because millions of people just somehow inexplicably love a poorly written Twilight fanfic about an abusive relationship…
My impression has been that people who subscribe to this one are emotionally conflating scientific + everything else complex = steps away from Christianity/God = secular government + whatever complex suppressing alternative approaches to medicine, lifestyle, entertainment, and everything previously dominated by religion.
Therefore it’s a conspiracy to persecute the faithful.
[Faithful to Christ, Crystals, Essential Oils, Pyramids, whatever.]
sigh
More locally, probably not so universally known, but overheard from my coworker’s phone call to his friend in Ohio (therefore it might be repeated in a tavern near you quite soon!):
Recently, a pipeline in Santa Barbara County was discovered to have been leaking and officials calculated that thousands of gallons of crude oil had made its way to the local ravines, rivulets, and water supply (possibly including all the way back to the beach, miles away).
My coworker’s theory is that radical environmentalists were the culprits.
Why? Wouldn’t that be counter to their cause?
Actually, it’s not counter to their long-term cause; they will do absolutely anything and go to any lengths to suppress industrial efforts, including sabotaging the local oil pipe to make it pollute the environment in the short term (then call media attention to it) so that the oil industry looks bad and will not be allowed to set up additional oil derricks off the coastline – any coastline – with the ‘2015 disaster’ in Santa Barbara used as an exemplary argument against additional drilling.
Because Deepwater Horizon wasn’t argument enough?:smack:
–G!
I know some people will ask why I’m using the colors.
I get those complaints every so often here.
In this case, I’m using the brown to indicate the theory is full of $#!+
Yea, the whole secret FEMA camps/ Prez preparing to declare martial law/ UN takeover. stuff was just garden variety crazy 30 years ago. But it gets a little crazier every year, since you have to believe that the gov’t is not only planning some nefarious genocidal plan, but that they’ve been doing the basic prep work for decades without actually getting around to all the actual evil stuff yet.
ISTM that the CTs get more elaborate every year. 50 years ago “President in cahoots with Mafia” was enough. Now there’s all sorts of baroque complications and plots within plots. With ever lessening connections to sensible motivations.
IOW, we ain’t seen nuthin’ yet. The CTs of the 2020s will make the stuff upthread seem tame. I can hardly wait. :smack::eek::dubious:
President ___ is going to suspend the next election and declare that he’s going to continue to be our dear leader for life (have heard for both W Bush and Obama)
Ebola was created by the US government because we hate black people
I used to think that the government spying on the internet usage of US citizen was out there, but now…
Some of these beat this hands down, but the reason they put the little strips that say “100,” or “50” etc. in paper money has nothing to do with making it harder to counterfeit.
It’s there so that the government can scan you with some kind of electronic reader and know how much money you have in your pocket!
The non-blacks who have gotten it over the years would probably have a few things to say about that. One of the American victims is of Asian descent, and a Cuban physician got it too. Both have recovered.
There are also people who believe that Obama was responsible for the epidemic, although they’re never clear as to exactly how, and others who believe that the American patients were brought here to kick-start our own epidemic. :rolleyes:
I first heard of the electronic scanner 30-plus years ago. In this case, this person told me that bills of all denominations have some kind of special metal in them, and people drive around with scanners and point them at people’s houses to find out how much cash they have on hand.
I didn’t believe it then, and don’t believe it now.
Former co-worker was into CT’s big time*. He asserted, among other things, the government blew up the WTC during 9/11 using planted explosives, and that the jets seen flying into them were 3D Holograms.
And his favorite: Anyone who tries to debunk a CT is in on the conspiracy.
*I don’t know about the lizard people one, but it tops anything I have ever heard. :eek:
The lovely Flat Earthers occupy a special place in my heart. They’re a little forum on the outskirts of the web that seem to honestly believe NASA is lying to us and the world is, well, flat. Their reasoning is . . . uh . . . despite spending way to much time browsing there, I’ve never actually wrapped my head around it. Something about bending lightwaves and fish-eye cameras. Now, I don’t doubt a significant percentage of them are just trolls, but there has to be a couple guys who buy into it.
Also, members there call people who disagree with them “Roundearthers,” which sounds like they’re calling you fat.
